Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

poncho55

Offline (the 04/27/2015 at 8:26am) | Search for a member

poncho55

23Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Monday 9 November 1992 (23 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 4757
  • Number of comments : 113
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 20 posted

About poncho55 : Hello, welcome to this page that is reserved for me. Yay.

I love FML, animals, spending time with my hubby, cooking, skiing, hiking, camping, video games, cartoons, stuffed animals/plush toys, swinging on the swings at the playground, eating sushi, adventures, the variety of beers in the world, Stitch (Lilo & Stitch), Merida (Brave), The Lord of the Rings, Harry Potter, Bioshock, Borderlands, Parkway Drive, Lights, Five Finger Death Punch, aaannd.. Sharpies.

If you cared/were bored enough to read that, thanks I guess. Have a nice day.

poncho55's page activity

Visits<b>Noelletakumi</b> - the 01/11/2016 at 2:35am<b>wondercat40</b> - the 01/09/2016 at 5:23pm<b>Aukrenchi</b> - the 01/03/2016 at 5:55am<b>Epickiller</b> - the 12/11/2015 at 4:09pm<b>Joshwarrior</b> - the 11/22/2015 at 9:15pm<b>raven83</b> - the 11/02/2015 at 7:26am<b>ahomelessmario</b> - the 10/18/2015 at 4:00pm<b>edgycliff</b> - the 10/16/2015 at 10:24pm<b>stereofeathers</b> - the 09/19/2015 at 6:58am<b>Etched</b> - the 09/03/2015 at 5:40am<b>djTrikhster</b> - the 08/28/2015 at 12:05am<b>beautifulmymy</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 6:30pm<b>khoov19</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 8:42am<b>knightofdarkness</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 12:43am<b>Liamj774</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 11:43pm<b>keilei</b> - the 06/02/2015 at 11:42am<b>Anikaaaaa</b> - the 05/28/2015 at 8:14am<b>trevorecb</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 11:22pm

Fucked!<b>Joshwarrior</b> - the 11/23/2015 at 3:16am<b>stereofeathers</b> - the 09/19/2015 at 12:58pm<b>Etched</b> - the 09/01/2015 at 9:25pm<b>khoov19</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 2:42pm<b>keilei</b> - the 06/02/2015 at 5:42pm<b>knightofdarkness</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 11:37pm<b>yuno_gasai</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 1:35pm<b>ahomelessmario</b> - the 03/02/2015 at 5:11am<b>Princess_Ash12</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 6:52am<b>ImTheAlpha</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 6:31pm<b>martin8337</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 8:36am<b>angelk19</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 8:50am<b>dk1991</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 7:17am<b>Zigstyle308</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 11:17pm<b>AndyClara</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 7:58am<b>EvilTurtle</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 7:23am<b>Noelletakumi</b> - the 02/19/2015 at 7:01am<b>MDoremis</b> - the 02/18/2015 at 7:50pm

poncho55's FML badges

Gold Rush

How about we run you a bath and give you a new car as well?

Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja

You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Seen it!

You’ve watched 5 FML videos on the website, and commented on them.

See all of poncho55's badges

poncho55's favorite FMLs

Today, I had a dream where I whacked my head against my shelf. I woke up immediately after, freaked out and whacked my head against my shelf. FML

#21360941
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31737) - you deserved it (4544)

On 02/22/2015 at 8:54am - health - by IngenuityAbsent - Canada (Ontario)

Today, a guy attacked me and tried to steal my bag. I tried to defend myself by biting him as hard as I could. I then woke up to my husband screaming in pain. FML

#21360466
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35073) - you deserved it (4321)

On 02/21/2015 at 3:28pm - misc - by poncho55 (woman) -

Today, while skiing down a steep mountain, a man ran over my skis, causing me to fall and roll down the slope. When I regained my balance, I saw the man had followed me just to say "How graceful" and continue on. FML

#21355416
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28632) - you deserved it (2277)

On 02/13/2015 at 3:31pm - misc - by jostertoaster12 - United States (Colorado)

Today, at a paintball match, my boyfriend shot me between the legs and asked, "Still want kids now?" FML

#21354035
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33804) - you deserved it (3801)

On 02/11/2015 at 11:11am - kids - by maybe? (woman) - Germany (Hamburg)

Today, my manager gave me hell for leaving the restaurant early yesterday. Guilty as charged, but only because I was rushed to the hospital after going into diabetic shock. This assmunch is convinced that I either faked it all to get off work early, or that I'd been eating our own stock. FML

#21343418
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31980) - you deserved it (2232)

On 01/24/2015 at 12:24pm - work - by Anonymous -

Today, I realized my job working with food is getting to me. While having sex with my boyfriend, I fell asleep. He asked me what I was doing, and apparently I sleep-talked, saying "I'm chopping lettuce". FML

#21343098
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35773) - you deserved it (4765)

On 01/23/2015 at 8:29pm - intimacy - by xoragebaby - United States

Today, I was complimented on my freckles. I don't actually have freckles, just a load of blackheads that won't go away. FML

#21322767
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30272) - you deserved it (3623)

On 12/23/2014 at 3:41pm - health - by eamiller (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, thanks to some asswipe drunk driver fleeing the cops the wrong way down a one-way street, I've now had my third wreck this year. My insurance premium's now higher than Bob Marley in a weed factory. FML

#21321099
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34761) - you deserved it (3279)

On 12/20/2014 at 7:53pm - money - by financially_wreckd (man) -

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend of 2 years after eating in a 5-star restaurant. She said that she wasn't ready and that she would walk home by herself, which she did. A homeless gentleman walked up from behind me, patted me on the back and said, "Bitches man." I cried. FML

#21315476
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42750) - you deserved it (3194)

On 12/11/2014 at 7:01am - love - by Brasilian29 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I decided to check out a dating site, when I stumbled across my ex wife's profile. She'd had it for four out of the five years of our marriage. And no, it didn't rate us as a good match. FML

#21305183
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33802) - you deserved it (3675)

On 11/24/2014 at 1:47pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, I had a dream that I kicked the moon like a soccer ball. It started swearing in my boyfriend's voice. That part wasn't a dream. FML

#21300835
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30658) - you deserved it (3639)

On 11/17/2014 at 5:00pm - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I get to add spaghetti sauce to my rather extensive list of things that don't belong in a person's eye but that end up in mine anyway. Other items include molten cheese, rock salt, orange juice, chips of nail polish, cotton fibers, and firework ash. FML

#21299049
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29677) - you deserved it (4818)

On 11/14/2014 at 4:58pm - health - by gspotter (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I was sitting on a bench at the local park, eating a banana. A guy old enough to be my grandfather walked by, turned to look at me, then said "Young man, I wish I were that banana." He walked away, and I almost blacked out choking on it in shock. FML

#21265897
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38633) - you deserved it (4035)

On 09/26/2014 at 4:40pm - misc - by Operation Yewtree here I come (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, my psychotic, very jealous ex-boyfriend appeared out of nowhere and punched a male store clerk who was helping me look for azaleas in a garden center. FML

#21264094
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37411) - you deserved it (3063)

On 09/23/2014 at 9:19pm - love - by Tag (woman) - Australia

Today, my fiancé and I were having sex in the early hours of the morning. He said "Morning sex is the best thing to wake up to." Without thinking, I responded "Yeah, unless you're in prison." He lost his erection due to laughing so hard and now can't look at me without laughing. FML

#21262210
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45716) - you deserved it (12721)

On 09/21/2014 at 1:11am - intimacy - by RuinedTheMood (woman) - United States (Texas)



Maïté Verjux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie delivers in 2016
  • Greetings my young friends! It's 2016 and I'm late. No, I'm not pregnant, I'm way too old for that sort of thing, even though I've been trying a lot recently (hey there Didier, you randy rascal…

Friday 5 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: