Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

pleasedonttellme

Search for a member

pleasedonttellme

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4587
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

pleasedonttellme's page activity

Visits<b>SatansAnus</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 3:18am<b>ireply_wlyrics</b> - the 11/06/2013 at 1:33pm<b>jaybrown</b> - the 10/20/2009 at 9:00pm<b>ch2358</b> - the 10/07/2009 at 4:50pm<b>MadHate4MyLife</b> - the 09/09/2009 at 11:50pm<b>prplr</b> - the 08/26/2009 at 6:17am<b>kayla_f_babyyy</b> - the 08/20/2009 at 8:59pm<b>EMR</b> - the 08/14/2009 at 3:49am<b>LebChickOnFira</b> - the 06/22/2009 at 4:38pm

pleasedonttellme's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

pleasedonttellme's favorite FMLs

Today, I was pulling out of my driveway, and was being aware of the flowers I had just planted. I moved my head to look out my window as not to hit them, not realizing my window was up. I then hit my head break my nose and drive over the flowers. FML

#1845735
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20291) - you deserved it (39033)

On 05/11/2009 at 3:46pm - misc - by samantha246 - United States (New York)

Today, I bought a brand new flat screen TV. When I brought it home it didn't work. Furious, I walked into Best Buy and yelled at a guy in a tucked in blue polo and khakis. I asked him why it didn't work and he said he didn't know. I kept screaming. He didn't have a nametag. He didn't work there. FML

#1101827
287 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11719) - you deserved it (115509)

On 04/18/2009 at 10:44pm - misc - by asdfghjkl (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, when my boyfriend reffered to my hair, I told him I was going to dye it. He responded by saying, "finally, so how much you going for, 40, maybe 50 pounds?". I said dye it, not diet. FML

#810319
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57557) - you deserved it (8540)

On 04/05/2009 at 12:17am - misc - by lifestinks - Canada (Ontario)

Today, me and my girlfriend got into a fight. After giving my genius response to one of her asinine comments, I stormed out of the store, having the last word. Ten minutes later she comes out to find me in the parking lot. My car wouldn't start. She texts me "Karma's a bitch" then drives away. FML

#159138
46 comments

Today, my dad told me to take my stress out by getting a girlfriend. My mom laughed and said, "no that won't work, just go jack off in the shower again." FML

#54872
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42081) - you deserved it (4395)

On 02/16/2009 at 5:59pm - intimacy - by IBleedArbor - United States (Connecticut)

Today, on campus, these really overly-happy people walking around with big signs saying "free hugs". When I walked towards them, their smiles faded, and they put their signs down. FML

#38092
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45650) - you deserved it (4094)

On 02/13/2009 at 4:51pm - misc - by shit's weak - United States (Indiana)

Today, I took my dog to the vet and she was diagnosed with obesity. The vet then told me that dogs usually imitate their owners eating and behavior habits. FML

#26407
18 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17135) - you deserved it (22445)

On 02/11/2009 at 5:05pm - animals - by qwertyasdfghzxcv - Canada (Ontario)

Today, at lunch I ordered a coke. The waiter replied "diet coke?" and I corrected him saying, "No, regular coke." He shook his head and said again, "diet coke." FML

#24019
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47329) - you deserved it (7921)

On 02/11/2009 at 2:14am - misc - by J (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was eating ice cream and I noticed some on my jeans so I wiped it off with my finger and licked it. It was bird shit. FML

#9438
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45965) - you deserved it (13846)

On 02/05/2009 at 8:23am - animals - by #201 (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, after numerous attempts, my car door still wouldn't unlock. After going ballistic on the lock, the key broke off inside. I then realized it wasn't my car. FML

#395
26 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10838) - you deserved it (24754)

On 11/26/2008 at 11:21pm - misc - by Smile - Sent from mobile version



FML's blog

  • Jim Trim's Illustrated FML
  • Action stations! I'm back from my holiday, I've got some sort of weirdly uneven tan and I already want to go back to the beach to bum about and finish off my colouring book. But I can't. I'm still…

Friday 29 August 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: