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pissflap

Offline (the 08/21/2014 at 5:40pm) | Search for a member

pissflap

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 464
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About pissflap : A bit of a tit really!

pissflap's page activity

Visits<b>olpally</b> - the 07/24/2013 at 10:33pm

pissflap's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

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pissflap's favorite FMLs

Today, at the pool, I decided to face my fears and go off the high dive. I slipped off the edge and did a barrel roll into the pool while screaming like a little girl. FML

#21231087
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32677) - you deserved it (5537)

On 08/06/2014 at 5:14pm - misc - by poolfail -

Today, there are people working in my bathroom. I have the shits. The only place I could think to go was in my cats litter box. I've used it twice and am now contemplating using it a third time. FML

#21220246
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38508) - you deserved it (6623)

On 07/25/2014 at 11:54am - animals - by shewhopoopsinlitterboxes (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my mother-in-law tried to "accidentally" run me over. FML

#21052599
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43372) - you deserved it (3807)

On 02/06/2014 at 6:07pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend decided the best way to inform me of his shoplifting tendencies was to steal stuff while we were at Starbucks. FML

#21049681
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37414) - you deserved it (4001)

On 02/03/2014 at 8:30pm - love - by lbailey32 - United States (New York)

Today, while in the prison I work at, I came down with severe digestion issues. Master control probably laughed as they watched me wait at the security gates in a cold sweat, squeezing my ass-cheeks together like an inmate smuggling contraband. FML

#21047394
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39138) - you deserved it (3997)

On 02/01/2014 at 5:42pm - work - by TwistedCherub1 (woman) - United States

Today, my evening was shot to hell when I found my pregnant wife on the floor, sobbing because we'd run out of cheese sticks. FML

#21046394
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43234) - you deserved it (8217)

On 01/31/2014 at 5:08pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was in the process of finally losing my virginity. Part-way through, my neighbour started shouting from his backyard, "Go, Nicolas! You can do it!" He was talking to his son, but the two of us have the same name. I couldn't finish. FML

#21046533
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55790) - you deserved it (6186) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/31/2014 at 4:05pm - intimacy - by prochainefois (man) - Sent from mobile version

Today, I finally finished making my daughter's wedding cake. When I checked on it later, I found a large slice had been cut out. I soon found out that my husband had instagrammed himself eating it, with the caption "#guiltypleasures". FML

#21046154
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47095) - you deserved it (4012)

On 01/31/2014 at 11:36am - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I had an upset stomach all day at work. When lunch break came, I rushed to the bathroom. Just as I turned into an unstoppable human whoopie cushion, a co-worker walked in. He heard the entire arse symphony, and just asked "What the fuck, dude?!" as he left. FML

#21045407
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41553) - you deserved it (4529)

On 01/30/2014 at 5:46pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Lancashire)

Today, I was at my new boyfriend's house, and he was taking a shower. I had to take a crap real bad, but his apartment only has the one bathroom. I couldn't wait for him to finish, and ended having to shit in a plastic bag. FML

#21044466
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48998) - you deserved it (21573)

On 01/29/2014 at 7:52pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was packing, when my parents told me to put my little sister's toothbrush in the top pocket of their suitcase. The pocket I opened had 3 unopened boxes of condoms in it. We're going to my gran's house, and I'm going to be sleeping on a mattress on the floor of their room. FML

#21040204
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52634) - you deserved it (4878)

On 01/26/2014 at 12:10am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)

Today, while driving home, my 3-year-old daughter told me she had to poop. I told her that she would have to wait until we got home. When we got home, she pulled down her pants and shat on the floor, because, "I'm home now." FML

#21040159
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44647) - you deserved it (9235)

On 01/25/2014 at 11:29pm - kids - by mom - United States (Texas)

Today, I ran into my apartment and let one rip, since I'd been holding it the whole elevator ride up. My parents had let themselves in while I was out, and laughed at me for a good 20 minutes. 5ML

#21038740
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36276) - you deserved it (5960)

On 01/24/2014 at 8:34pm - misc - by DJ (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my mum decided that having the flu and being too lazy to go upstairs to the bathroom is a valid excuse to shit in a jug instead. 5ML

#21038402
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40032) - you deserved it (3181)

On 01/24/2014 at 4:02pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (West Lothian)

Today, my husband and I are sick. He keeps whining about how bad he feels. I'm just as sick, as well as 7 months pregnant. I've not only been taking care of his whiny ass: I've cooked, cleaned, and gone to the store several times because the tissues we had were too rough on his nose. FML

#21035436
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61158) - you deserved it (8693)

On 01/21/2014 at 8:16pm - health - by AnonWife - United Kingdom (North Lincolnshire)



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