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pink_pulse

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  • Number of visits : 4232
  • Number of comments : 8
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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pink_pulse's page activity

Visits<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:15pm

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pink_pulse's favorite FMLs

Today, I tickled my girlfriend, and her first reflex was to swing her elbow back and break my nose. FML

#15281927
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14183) - you deserved it (29214)

On 03/12/2011 at 5:53am - misc - by Nerrh - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my boyfriend said he wanted to try something new. By something new, it was to put flour in my butt and see what would happen if I farted. FML

#15281187
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45432) - you deserved it (7708)

On 03/12/2011 at 12:10am - intimacy - by Username - United States

Today, my boyfriend did the Austin Powers dance/strip-tease while dancing to 'I Touch Myself'. It was cute until he ripped off his shirt and revealed that he'd shaved his chest hair in the shape of a penis. FML

#15261290
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45895) - you deserved it (8716)

On 03/10/2011 at 10:08am - intimacy - by Anon (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I bought my fiancée a dress for her birthday. She accused me of saying she was fat, because I bought it in medium rather than small. After trying on the dress, she's now not only mad at me for buying it, but also because the dress fits perfectly. FML

#15252423
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42132) - you deserved it (4085)

On 03/09/2011 at 5:27pm - love - by drebel (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, as I couldn't get the airplane seat buckle to buckle, I faced the fact that I've been in denial about how fat I have become. The people in my row faced it too as I began to sob uncontrollably. FML

#15240526
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17843) - you deserved it (32041)

On 03/08/2011 at 1:25pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, my five year old son decided to move all my stuffed animals I have around the house, into sex positions and massive orgies. What have I been teaching my son lately? FML

#15229654
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13542) - you deserved it (41590)

On 03/07/2011 at 2:04pm - intimacy - by lolzboss - United States (Virginia)

Today, I discovered that my Facebook profile picture, of me between my boyfriend and a friend, is actually me between my boyfriend and the girl he has been cheating on me with. FML

#15220903
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49196) - you deserved it (3809)

On 03/06/2011 at 7:27pm - intimacy - by ocean555 (woman) - United Kingdom (Newcastle upon Tyne)

Today, my girlfriend was giving me a handjob in the shower. As I was reaching climax, my mom walked by the bathroom door and started talking to me. My girlfriend didn't stop, and in order to distract from the situation at hand, I had to carry on the conversation with my mom. FML

#15218324
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38974) - you deserved it (10538)

On 03/06/2011 at 1:15pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Sweden (Vastra Gotaland)

Today, my husband told me I was lucky to have someone who would love me no matter what my vagina smelled like. FML

#15215941
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40346) - you deserved it (20882)

On 03/06/2011 at 6:28am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Reserved

Today, I was performing a show about pirates for a youth program. A child started crying because I wasn't a real pirate. A little girl took my defense: "He's a real pirate, his teeth are all yellow!" FML

#15203420
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27257) - you deserved it (10139)

On 03/05/2011 at 1:07am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my girlfriend went down on me for the first time. Just as I was reaching climax my brother raced into the bathroom right next to my door and began to vomit extremely loudly. FML

#15202722
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32419) - you deserved it (4934)

On 03/05/2011 at 12:05am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was answering a text from one of my students asking me if they could re-take a test. I thought I'd texted back "No, you can't." Auto correct had used a more frequently used word: "No, you cunt." FML

#15184059
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37543) - you deserved it (23391)

On 03/03/2011 at 6:22am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend was inside a cell phone store talking to a sales guy while I waited outside. I sent him a text, not realizing that the guy was using his phone to call customer service. A topless photo of me shows up on his phone when I text him. The sales guy looked. Twice. FML

#15183432
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9456) - you deserved it (52585)

On 03/03/2011 at 3:32am - intimacy - by LLCoolBean (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my boyfriend and I were play-wrestling on the bed, when he started to tickle me. I tried to pull away but he pushed me back down. I ended up hitting my eye on the corner of the nightstand. His comment was "this is why you shouldn't struggle." FML

#15177463
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27397) - you deserved it (7129)

On 03/02/2011 at 6:43pm - misc - by taiannalynn5 -

Today, while pensively thinking up my next awesome Facebook status over dinner, I finally came to the conclusion that I need to get a life. FML

#15165493
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12900) - you deserved it (36165)

On 03/01/2011 at 6:18pm - health - by Baileyy - United States



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