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pink_pulse

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pink_pulse

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  • Number of visits : 4235
  • Number of comments : 8
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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pink_pulse's page activity

Visits<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:15pm

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pink_pulse's favorite FMLs

Today, I was on Facebook, looking at pictures from a party I went to. In most of them, I was sitting on the sofa, my shorts bunched to the side, with half my vajayjay on show. FML

#15381782
319 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19167) - you deserved it (61896)

On 03/19/2011 at 11:43am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I found out that when I orgasm, my increased heart rate causes me to pass out. I also found out my boyfriend doesn't stop when I'm unconscious. FML

#15379416
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52758) - you deserved it (7770)

On 03/19/2011 at 6:32am - intimacy - by anonymous - United Kingdom (Kent)

Today, someone rear-ended me while I was on my way home. I was extremely upset and I called my boyfriend for comfort and to help inspect the damage. After taking a good look at the car, he said, "Damn, if only you fucked this hard." FML

#15366691
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33875) - you deserved it (8860)

On 03/18/2011 at 12:11pm - intimacy - by emm (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was spending Saint Patrick's Day with my girlfriend, when she started pinching me for not wearing green. To my complete shock, when she pinched my nipple, I got the biggest, most noticeable erection I've ever had in my life, and no matter what I did, it wouldn't go away. We were in public. FML

#15355329
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43870) - you deserved it (8695)

On 03/17/2011 at 6:38pm - intimacy - by Mr. Sensitive Nips - United States (Texas)

Today, after my 22 year old son realized that there was no more contact solution, he decided to use tequila because he thought it would "kill the germs." We had to go to the hospital to have his eyes flushed out. I raised this moron. FML

#15339337
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41740) - you deserved it (11203)

On 03/16/2011 at 6:05pm - kids - by WTF -

Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. I started to moan right when I was about to climax. He got worried, stopped and asked, "Are you okay?!" FML

#15336474
292 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46021) - you deserved it (8106)

On 03/16/2011 at 12:50pm - intimacy - by thisblows - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my mom caught me talking to my penis. FML

#15333405
378 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19363) - you deserved it (88628)

On 03/16/2011 at 3:31am - intimacy - by eric - United States

Today, I got a call from my long distance girlfriend. She's about a month pregnant. I haven't seen her in person for six months, but she still insists it's mine. I don't know which would be worse: her lying or her being that stupid. FML

#15321178
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54054) - you deserved it (5161)

On 03/15/2011 at 11:50am - love - by notthedad (man) - China

Today, I banged into a glass door. My friend laughed at me, so I turned around and gave him the finger, then turned back to continue walking and banged into the door again. FML

#15319937
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14283) - you deserved it (51193)

On 03/15/2011 at 8:37am - misc - by sylverster - Singapore

Today, I showed my colleagues how I could switch on my webcam at home from the office. That's how we all found out my wife is cheating on me. FML

#15309756
282 comments

I agree, your life sucks (107622) - you deserved it (6444) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/14/2011 at 5:26pm - love - by Albert06 - France

Today, I told my boyfriend that I love him. He responded by asking for a blowjob. FML

#15308745
257 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44524) - you deserved it (13539)

On 03/14/2011 at 3:16pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I came back to my boyfriend's house where I've been staying to find all my things thrown outside, ruined, including my entire CD collection, textbooks and clothes cut up. All because I had left my cell phone there and had got a text from a guy saying "Hi, how have you been?" FML

#15301527
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53247) - you deserved it (8313)

On 03/14/2011 at 12:07am - love - by wtf -

Today, I found out the reason my boyfriend dumped me was because his parents don't like the fact that I go to a prestigious university. However, they're completely accepting of the drunken slob who's dating their daughter. FML

#15294376
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33108) - you deserved it (3252)

On 03/13/2011 at 3:17pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Sheffield)

Today, I was at Aéropostale with some friends when I noticed a woman glaring at me. When we got to the checkout, the woman still had her eyes on me, so I asked why she was staring. She snapped, "If you had kept your legs closed, you wouldn't be pregnant." I'm not pregnant. FML

#15284565
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42434) - you deserved it (5617)

On 03/12/2011 at 4:11pm - misc - by vlcardenx3 (woman) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, I was texting a girl I like. Every message she sent came ten minutes after I sent her a message. When I told her "I've to go", she responded almost instantly with an "Ok, bye". FML

#15282818
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31639) - you deserved it (9011)

On 03/12/2011 at 9:43am - love - by AuraOfJustice - United States



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