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picklezz123's favorite FMLs
Today, I wore my brand new Wonderbra to school. When I got home, my dad looked at me and started laughing hysterically. Between breaths, he asked if anyone actually thought my chest was that big and said "You know why it's called a Wonderbra? Guys take it off and wonder where your tits went." FML
by Anonymous / 10/10/2011 at 6:26pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
Today, I peeked through my window and trained a pair of binoculars on my neighbour's house. Every night without fail, he ends up standing in front of his window topless to flex his muscles. This time, I was surprised to instead find a note taped to the window saying, "Sorry, I'm out tonight." FML
by Anonymous / 06/29/2011 at 7:52pm / United States (Indiana) / Intimacy
Today, I was reading a crappy "How to spice up your marriage" book with my husband for laughs. One of the ideas was for the guy to whip his knob out, stand behind his girl and say "Can you say that into the microphone?" Now he does it every chance he gets, and I fall for it EVERY TIME. FML
by Kate / 06/07/2011 at 3:50am / United States (California) / Intimacy
by liynda / 05/05/2011 at 9:49pm / Canada / Miscellaneous
by Nxydolli / 04/29/2011 at 3:34pm / United Kingdom (Durham) / Geek
by Anonymous / 04/26/2011 at 9:56am / United Kingdom (London) / Health
by HWS / 04/15/2011 at 1:47am / Canada (British Columbia) / Health
by Anonymous / 04/14/2011 at 1:49am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
Today, I realized I don't know which is sadder: the fact I have detailed conversations with myself in my car, or that I bought a Bluetooth earpiece so that I can do it in public without people thinking I'm a complete lunatic. FML
by shelby / 03/30/2011 at 12:54am / United States / Health
Today, I joked with my dad, saying I'd gotten my boyfriend pregnant. In response, he slapped me, threw my phone across the room, smashed my laptop, and then took a moment for what I'd said to sink in. FML
by rowie1311 / 03/27/2011 at 2:09pm / United Kingdom (Northamptonshire) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 03/21/2011 at 1:32pm / United Kingdom (Wiltshire) / Geek
Today, at the Mommy and Me dance class that I take my four year old daughter to, the instructor had us do a stretch, telling us to pretend we're mermaids. My daughter said to me, "But you're not a mermaid, you're a whale!" FML
by Abby_gummibear / 03/19/2011 at 5:04pm / United States (Nevada) / Kids
Today, I emailed my potential boss a copy of my résumé. However, I didn't realize until too late that it was my fake resume, created for an English class project. Some of my former jobs included being a certified gangster, as well as the former president of Canada. FML
by Almostfunny / 03/16/2011 at 9:01am / United States (Massachusetts) / Work
by Anonymous / 10/17/2010 at 2:28am / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous
- Today, marks the third week after getting my braces, and yet I still can't eat any solid foods. My… Today, early in the morning, I went to the store for a few things. The doors wide open, I gather my… Today, I missed points on a visual inspection at work. Being the manager, I stayed after close the…