Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
About pickles1994 : Hi. About me:
I am currently upgrading my high school courses while I ponder on what to do for my career. For the mean time I work a part-time job at Walmart.
My hobbies: I have been long boarding for a few years now, I love to bomb down hills with friends and have a good time. Along with that my Need for Speed doesn't just come with long boarding, I also love to race in my little $800 car. What can I say... I'm an adrenaline junkie. I have an Xbox live account, mostly used on weekends.
People who I find hilarious because they actually put effort into their comments: Doc Bastard, Perdix, Pleonasm, and boners who is MIA.
Feel free to message me! I'm known as a great people person. Enjoy reading other peoples miseries!
PS: why can't we all just get along. I realized over the years of being on FML the community here has gone downhill. To the people who are new here: watch out there's a lot of assholes on here who will rat you out if your comment is not witty or gos off topic.
I agree, their lives suck
200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
100 kick ass comments
100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!
Today, I found out that the candy bracelet my sister gave me a few days ago was actually a candy cock ring she'd used on her boyfriend just a few hours prior. Apparently, she didn't like the taste. I however, did. FML
Today, after dealing with tons of drama and working a 14 hour shift, I took a shower. When I stepped out, a weak spot in the floor gave way. While falling through the floor I grabbed the toilet tank lid, which fell into the tank and broke it. Now my leg hurts and the bathroom's flooded. FML
Today, I thought I'd surprise my girlfriend with a bear hug. I found her in the hall with her back to me talking to friends. As I walked up behind her and was about to wrap my arms around her, she said, "so does anyone have any ideas about how I should break it off with my boyfriend?" FML
Today, I was playing football for my school. I had the ball and was running down the sideline. The guy behind pulled my flag off along with my shorts and boxers. I dove to try to escape and I happened to land on the hottest girl in the class who was on the sideline. I had no pants on. FML
Today, I got to work in the ER at the local hospital. A lady came in with high blood sugar. She was concerned because the same thing happened to her husband. I reassured her, telling her she'll be back with her husband in an hour or so. Her husband died four years ago from something similar. FML
Today, I finally got my paycheck from working at my minimum wage job for the last three months. I was delighted when I saw it was worth $846. On my way to cash it, I destroyed my car's suspension. It's going to cost almost $800 to fix. FML
Today, after a long workout I come back to my locker, to find my lock had been cut. I looked inside realizing my phone and ipod had been stolen. If that wasn't bad enough, my keys were gone. I ran out to the parking lot to find an empty spot where my car had once been parked. FML
Today, I had my first job interview and didn't have much of an appetite because of the nerves. So I grabbed a brownie that my roommate had left in the fridge and ate it on the train ride in to the city. About 20 minutes into my interview I was so stoned I couldn't speak. FML
Today, I was feeling sick and having trouble breathing easily. I decided to take a nap and apparently ended up sleeping with my mouth wide open since breathing was an issue. I woke up to my boyfriend trying to put his penis in my mouth. FML
Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML
Friday 30 January 2015