About philosophyfail : I'm a recent college grad with a philosophy degree... What else am I going to do?
This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
YDI master
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
Today, my boyfriend and I were talking about being super heroes. He said I could be "The Period" because I'm a bitch. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13440) - you deserved it (5974)
On 08/25/2012 at 8:47am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I realized how much I hate my girlfriend, when I got excited as the doctor told me I should refrain from having sex for the next two months. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6836) - you deserved it (16807)
On 08/22/2012 at 4:08pm - love - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my boyfriend and I reached that point in our relationship where just a simple phone conversation was too boring. His idea to spice things up? Playing Minecraft together. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12668) - you deserved it (4847)
On 08/22/2012 at 11:13am - love - by Minecraftwhyyy (woman) - United States
Today, my boyfriend and I reached that point in our relationship where just a simple phone conversation was too boring. His idea to spice things up? Playing Minecraft together. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12668) - you deserved it (4847)
On 08/22/2012 at 11:13am - love - by Minecraftwhyyy (woman) - United States
Today, my boyfriend and I broke up. I was pretty upset, so one of my guy friends offered to comfort me and get some ice cream. Apparently his definition of "comforting" is to feel my tits and try to get me to give him head. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24135) - you deserved it (3727)
On 08/21/2012 at 9:59pm - intimacy - by m (woman) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I had to bail my boyfriend out of jail. He got arrested because he was tugging his man-meat in the drive-thru at a McDonald's. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17903) - you deserved it (3520)
On 08/19/2012 at 10:05pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, at the water park, my grandmother's boob slipped out. Every time I close my eyes, I see her dangling breast in my mind. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21869) - you deserved it (1688)
On 08/19/2012 at 1:25am - misc - by JMG - United States
Today, as I was riding my bike, my foot slipped and I did a slow speed-tumble over the top, ripping my balls wide open. Number of stitches: too many to count. Size of balls: softball. Color: blue. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31145) - you deserved it (1491)
On 08/18/2012 at 1:15am - health - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I was at the gym, when a pretty overweight guy started staring and eventually taunting me. Let me tell you, lines such as "Lay off the cake, fatty!" and "I can see your gut hanging out your ass, for fuck's sake!" don't exactly boost one's self-confidence. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16564) - you deserved it (1505)
On 08/17/2012 at 12:27pm - misc - by fuckoffandfuckoffagainyoucunt (man) - United Kingdom (Kent)
Today, I was talking to my husband about how I wanted our marriage to improve and not just be sex all the time. In the middle of my sentence, he asked for a blow job. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20978) - you deserved it (653)
On 08/17/2012 at 9:31am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (South Carolina)
Today, I was suntanning outside, when I had a bout of nausea. I rushed to the toilet, hoping at all costs to just dry-heave it away. When I lifted the lid, I was faced with two of the most rancid floaters I've ever seen, courtesy of my live-in gran. Well, my stomach's empty now. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17365) - you deserved it (1340)
On 08/16/2012 at 8:22pm - health - by rainbows? more like shitstorms (man) - United States
Today, my aunt borrowed my favorite shirt. Don't worry, she returned it. Complete with jizz stains. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25195) - you deserved it (2213)
On 08/16/2012 at 3:28pm - intimacy - by itwasmyfavoriteshirt - United States (Arkansas)
Today, my girlfriend admitted she had a nightmare about having sex with me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19578) - you deserved it (1880)
On 08/15/2012 at 7:40am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Kent)
Today, I had a chat with my husband, and I convinced him to try being more spontaneous to spice up our sex life. This evening, he burst into our bedroom with an eyepatch on, and "seductively" growled, "I'm gonna slay your pussy, wench." FML
I agree, your life sucks (10552) - you deserved it (32416)
On 08/11/2012 at 6:22pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I was at the mall, when a guy started screaming at his buddy for sleeping with his sister. It was pretty hilarious, so when he stormed off, I mockingly yelled, "Pussy!" He then whirled around and beat the absolute hell out of his friend. Now I feel like I'm going to reincarnate as a turd. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4465) - you deserved it (32285)
On 08/09/2012 at 3:51pm - misc - by feelsterrible (man) - United States (Georgia)
Monday 20 May 2013
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