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About philosophyfail : I'm a recent college grad with a philosophy degree... What else am I going to do?
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
YDI master
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
Judgmental
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
Today, I was discharged from the hospital after having scrotal surgery. When I got home, the anesthetic had worn off, but I felt okay. Then my dog jumped up at me, paws slamming straight into my nuts. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5523) - you deserved it (477)
On 05/23/2012 at 2:47pm - health - by shanxi (man) - United States
Today, my colleague yet again misused the word "literally." It's driving me insane. I have to work opposite him and hear him say things like he's just "literally shit himself inside out." FML
I agree, your life sucks (5333) - you deserved it (1172)
On 05/21/2012 at 10:11am - work - by Rebecca (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I was jumped and savagely beaten to the ground by a group of six-year-olds wearing Disney princess masks. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5214) - you deserved it (1355)
On 05/18/2012 at 10:13am - kids - by 23yearoldtoddler - United States
Today, I was at the supermarket checkout. I handed over my items, which included some tampons, tissues, and toilet roll. The security guard standing beside the cashier remarked loudly, "I'll be damned; she's flowing from every hole!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (10342) - you deserved it (1102) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Today, my turtle, who had a little portion of the garden all to herself, died. My 5-year-old nephew wanted to "be like Mario" by jumping on her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10675) - you deserved it (621) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 05/05/2012 at 6:06am - kids - by Grindyloo -
Today, I shot a paintball gun at a bees' nest. The bees flew through my neighbors' windows and, for lack of a better word, slaughtered them. An ambulance was called, and I feel like a total dick. FML
I agree, your life sucks (2048) - you deserved it (14007)
On 04/30/2012 at 5:34pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, at a concert, I got into a fight with a man in a banana suit. FML
I agree, your life sucks (2617) - you deserved it (4246)
On 04/29/2012 at 5:45am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Manitoba)
Today, while at work, a man grabbed my beard, said it was impressive, and then uttered the words, "I love you." FML
I agree, your life sucks (6008) - you deserved it (713)
On 04/25/2012 at 2:46am - work - by foshizzle (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, I was trolling in a chat room when someone said, quote: "He's just a no-life, unemployed loser still living in his mom's basement. Probably spends all day stroking his tiny dong and fantasizing about having a real girlfriend." I actually started crying because it was so accurate. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9183) - you deserved it (30484)
On 04/23/2012 at 6:06pm - misc - by pathetic (man) - Poland (Mazowieckie)
Today, while landscaping my backyard, I was pulling a big weed out of the ground. After the last tug, the soil came free, but ended up with me punching myself full force in the nuts. I think my future children are already filing for parental abuse. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13788) - you deserved it (2512)
On 04/21/2012 at 11:27pm - health - by JurassicHole (man) - United States
Today, my husband drew a penis on every one of my cigarettes. It's a new pack. FML
I agree, your life sucks (1956) - you deserved it (15063)
On 04/21/2012 at 11:15pm - misc - by Jenn P (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, my boyfriend said he was going to give me breakfast in bed before he left. He walked over, threw some granola bars on the bed next to me and left. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6542) - you deserved it (992)
On 04/21/2012 at 9:04am - love - by still hungry - United States (Illinois)
Today, I found myself humming a Skrillex ditty all day. I'm beginning to wonder if I've had some sort of stroke. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3606) - you deserved it (1436)
On 04/19/2012 at 8:12pm - misc - by WTF? (man) - United States
Today, I had to put one of my preschool students in timeout for masturbating during nap time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8778) - you deserved it (782)
On 04/17/2012 at 8:07pm - intimacy - by lindsaykay - United States
Today, I was at a party, when the cops busted us. Since I'm underage, I hid behind a chair for an hour and a half while they breathalyzed everyone and sat them in the same room I was in. The cops left, everyone realized I was behind the chair, and now my nickname is "Anne Frank". FML
I agree, your life sucks (9871) - you deserved it (21786)
On 04/12/2012 at 2:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)
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