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pharaohmonkey

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pharaohmonkey
  • Town/Country : New York, United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 5 July 1997 (16 years)
  • Number of visits : 274
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About pharaohmonkey : FACE

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pharaohmonkey's favorite FMLs

Today, I posted my status on Facebook as "slightly hungover." My grandma commented on it with "liar, you were helping me clean last night." She's right. FML

#16221236
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12519) - you deserved it (62228)

On 05/17/2011 at 12:15pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I updated my facebook status as "lost all contacts, need numbers". My mom commented saying "her phone didn't get reset, she just doesn't have any friends". Her comment got 32 likes. FML

#16216405
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42939) - you deserved it (7704)

On 05/17/2011 at 12:05am - misc - by Username -

Today, my sister and I both got "good luck" cards from our aunt wishing us well on our exams. My sister's said "We know you will do well". Mine said "We will love you no matter what happens". FML

#16173982
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32614) - you deserved it (4313)

On 05/14/2011 at 4:09pm - misc - by simonjudy (man) - United Kingdom (Warwickshire)

Today, I found out that my grandma has been sending me birthday money every year. My mom just steals it before I ever see it. FML

#16168772
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49464) - you deserved it (2812)

On 05/14/2011 at 7:40am - money - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was taking a dump and I pushed so hard that I got light headed and passed out on the floor. FML

#16168525
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34625) - you deserved it (12378)

On 05/14/2011 at 6:43am - health - by BrownDump - United States

Today, I found out that my neighbors' 9 year old son has been the one taking a shit on my doorstep everyday. Why? Because Cartman from South Park said that if you keep doing it, the person in the house will move. FML

#16166578
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35839) - you deserved it (4156)

On 05/14/2011 at 1:07am - misc - by IhateThem - United States

Today, I realized my mom cares more about Kurt's bullying problem on Glee than she does for mine. FML

#16162317
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37792) - you deserved it (3571)

On 05/13/2011 at 8:17pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was sitting on the bus following a harrowing breakup. A boy of no more than 6 looked at me full of compassion and said, "Are you crying because you're ugly?" FML

#16116610
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40929) - you deserved it (5219) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 05/10/2011 at 10:56am - kids - by Hahapasdroleleptit - France

Today, my 12 year old son came home from school and informed me that he bought an air guitar for $20. He honestly thinks this is a good price. FML

#16113855
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28048) - you deserved it (9219)

On 05/10/2011 at 1:18am - kids - by Whatdididowrong? -

Today, my six year old told me I have a big nose. When I told her that she hurt my feelings, she laughed and said "Don't be silly mummy, ugly people don't have feelings." FML

#14199055
292 comments

I agree, your life sucks (104543) - you deserved it (14020)

On 12/14/2010 at 3:21am - kids - by uglywoman - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my husband dropped me off at work. Ten minutes later I got a text saying "I just dropped the b*tch off I'll be there in a few baby, miss you". I asked him about it. He said, "I don't know what you're talking about, Megan". My name isn't Megan. Not even close. FML

#159600
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (1097670) - you deserved it (108940)

On 02/28/2009 at 6:10am - love - by thatsucks (woman) - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)

Today, I saw an elderly man fall in a crosswalk, so I jumped off my bike to help. As I helped him across, the light turned green. I then watched across a 6 lane street as someone stole my bike. FML

#86179
717 comments

I agree, your life sucks (737612) - you deserved it (74063)

On 02/20/2009 at 3:29am - misc - by Mick (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML

#56665
496 comments

I agree, your life sucks (218431) - you deserved it (77984)

On 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm - kids - by offbeans (man) - United States (California)



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