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petrolhead

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petrolhead
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  • Number of visits : 2355
  • Number of comments : 45
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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petrolhead's favorite FMLs

Today, I was online and I saw a friend that I hadn't talked to in two years come online. I IM'ed him, only for him to respond, "I haven't responded to any messages of yours in over a year. Most people would get the hint." FML

#14062616
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21411) - you deserved it (6958)

On 12/02/2010 at 6:43pm - misc - by wingless_angel_7 (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, while having sex on the couch with my single neighbour, a beam in the couch broke. Not even slightly fazed, she said, "It's okay, my husband can fix it." Husband? FML

#14059458
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26645) - you deserved it (6210)

On 12/02/2010 at 12:02pm - intimacy - by nickyboy (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I had to explain to my doctor and parents that I dislocated my shoulder while masturbating. FML

#12316575
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28405) - you deserved it (32119)

On 08/04/2010 at 8:24pm - intimacy - by kinky - United States (Virginia)

Today, I found out that my entire family thinks I have no friends, am expressionless (to quote, "a robot") and that my monotonous voice hints at the suppressed depression hidden deep inside me. According to them, I need psychic evaluation. It all came out at a family reunion. FML

#8993949
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18174) - you deserved it (2724)

On 03/11/2010 at 9:28am - misc - by talhabilal - Pakistan (Punjab)

Today, I got on a treadmill for the first time. I was running at a very high speed. I needed a break but didn't know how to get off. I decided to just let the machine take me to the edge so I could get off. I was thrown off the treadmill and landed with my happy sacks crashing into a dumbbell. FML

#7231973
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5914) - you deserved it (34095)

On 01/09/2010 at 5:17am - health - by King7 (man) - Pakistan (Sindh)

Today, I was eating a packet of chips while watching TV. I saw a crumb on the table in front of me, so without thinking I picked it up and ate it. It wasn't a crumb. It was a tick. FML

#5679809
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10886) - you deserved it (38341)

On 10/06/2009 at 9:01am - health - by ticked (man) - Pakistan (Sindh)

Today, I took my friends out to an expensive restaurant for my birthday treat. They had arranged for a surprise birthday cake for me which I cut, very happily, while they chanted birthday wishes. When the bill came, I discovered I was supposed to pay for my great 'surprise' cake. FML

#2336185
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47260) - you deserved it (4651)

On 05/27/2009 at 6:15am - money - by abc (woman) - Pakistan (Sindh)

Today, my physics teacher asked who had implants. I raised my hand. Then he asked me to show him the implants. Shocked at his request I called him a perv. I later discovered he meant dental implants as he was teaching x rays not breast implants. FML

#232961
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11017) - you deserved it (105225)

On 03/07/2009 at 8:40am - misc - by Noname - Pakistan (Islamabad)



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