petrolhead

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Offline (the 08/29/2015 at 9:29am)

petrolhead

3Fucked!

petrolhead
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 4 February 1990 (26 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4729
  • Number of comments : 58
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About petrolhead : not using fml frequently. do leave me a message if you wana talk about G wagen ;) or aircrafts. I have authorities on both. :D

petrolhead's page activity

Visits<b>Infinity_seeker</b> - the 09/22/2016 at 10:53am<b>cats4lyfe</b> - the 07/16/2016 at 10:08pm<b>AHzulu</b> - the 05/01/2016 at 5:59pm<b>flupsht</b> - the 03/07/2016 at 9:52pm<b>captain_fail</b> - the 01/07/2016 at 4:25pm<b>Envy22</b> - the 11/20/2015 at 6:30pm<b>apineapple</b> - the 10/17/2015 at 10:25am<b>supershot33</b> - the 10/12/2015 at 12:04am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 10/11/2015 at 9:56am<b>BasketCase092</b> - the 08/29/2015 at 11:09pm<b>hotheadslav</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 11:21pm<b>umerin</b> - the 05/31/2015 at 3:06am<b>cutiegurl2</b> - the 05/30/2015 at 10:43am<b>eeshaa</b> - the 05/15/2015 at 8:30am<b>vlopez917</b> - the 03/12/2015 at 9:07pm<b>Bazinga_1821</b> - the 03/06/2015 at 6:34pm<b>AlyssaDiannaa</b> - the 01/15/2015 at 10:13pm<b>macncheeze97</b> - the 01/14/2015 at 11:21am

Fucked!<b>AHzulu</b> - the 05/01/2016 at 11:59pm<b>BasketCase092</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 2:59am<b>collegecutie</b> - the 11/03/2014 at 7:29am

petrolhead's FML badges

Happy Ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

See all of petrolhead's badges

petrolhead's favorite FMLs

Today, I was answering a text from one of my students asking me if they could re-take a test. I thought I'd texted back "No, you can't." Auto correct had used a more frequently used word: "No, you cunt." FML

by Anonymous / 03/03/2011 at 6:22am / United States (California) / Work

Today, while riding the bus to a really important job interview the child sitting next to me threw up in my lap. His mother then told him to wipe his mouth. He used my sleeve. FML

by elfy2 / 03/02/2011 at 9:49pm / Kids

Today, I started my job as a high school janitor. A student decided to welcome me by taking a dump in the urinal. FML

by Worstjob / 03/02/2011 at 7:35pm / United States (Idaho) / Work

Today, my fiancé and I had a fight over household expenses. He's never had a job in his life, but this didn't stop him demanding that I get another full-time job to pay for video games and beer. FML

by me / 03/02/2011 at 6:21pm / United States (Washington) / Money

Today, my girlfriend thought it would be sexy to stick her finger up my ass during sex. I screamed like a little girl and barely managed to finish. Afterward, she said, 'Now you know how it feels.' FML

by Anon. / 03/01/2011 at 6:51pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, I got a call from my daughter's school. Apparently, she was learning about the food pyramid and when she was asked to identify what she had eaten the day before, she said "dog food". FML

by Ldp56 / 02/25/2011 at 1:44pm / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, I asked out a girl I like to a movie. She said "I hate babysitting." FML

by Anonymous / 02/25/2011 at 7:17am / Egypt (Al Qahirah) / Love

Today, I had to get into my house via the dog flap because my mom changed the locks. FML

by Anonymous / 02/18/2011 at 4:18pm / United States / Animals

Today, at work, my phone rang. My intern answered it and told me it was a coworker who'd just left. I picked up and said "What's up bitch? What are you going to complain about now?!" It was actually my boss. FML

by Username / 02/18/2011 at 4:33am / Work

Today, I woke up to a bloody nose. Instead of rushing to the bathroom, I creatively dripped the blood over a knife for photography class because the assignment was to show emotion. So many of the students and faculty were disturbed that I'm now forced to talk to the school psychologist. FML

by rhartnett11 / 02/16/2011 at 7:56am / Miscellaneous

Today, I rummaged around in the attic, looking for old pictures of me and my family, so I could make a surprise collage. Instead, I found my dad's old journals, talking about how desperately he didn't want a kid, and how he wanted to leave my mother more and more every day that passed since I was born. FML

by surfergal91 / 02/14/2011 at 3:12pm / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was in class when someone came in with a rose for me. My teacher made me read the card aloud: "I'm breaking up with you, happy Valentine's." It was from my boyfriend. FML

by sexyredhead / 02/14/2011 at 1:14pm / United States / Love

Today, I dreamed I was getting married. I was wearing a white dress, had incredible cleavage and perfectly done makeup. Just one problem. I'm a guy. FML

by bride / 02/14/2011 at 1:24am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that it is never, ever a good idea to put a band-aid of any kind on your penis, because eventually you will have to take it off. FML

by Anonymous / 02/14/2011 at 12:31am / United States (North Carolina) / Health

Today, a man pulled me violently into an alleyway and informed me I was being mugged. Being a body-builder, I said, "Oh yeah? I dare you." He kicked my ass in a matter of seconds, stole my wallet, then farted on my bruised face. He called me a wimp. FML

by NotAsToughAsHeThinks / 02/13/2011 at 10:25pm / United States (Montana) / Health