pernicious_pink

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pernicious_pink

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 9417
  • Number of comments : 40
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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pernicious_pink's page activity

Visits<b>tchatfield9413</b> - the 09/12/2015 at 9:16am<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 11:08pm<b></b> - the 03/10/2011 at 1:21am<b>misa_amane</b> - the 07/09/2009 at 12:04pm<b>bludie_scab</b> - the 06/26/2009 at 11:09am<b>ilikeboys</b> - the 06/05/2009 at 5:23pm<b>Ilovelife07</b> - the 06/05/2009 at 11:57am<b>altna</b> - the 06/04/2009 at 3:57pm<b>Rawrrr14</b> - the 06/01/2009 at 6:19pm<b>MissBunnyfufu</b> - the 05/31/2009 at 7:28pm<b>Hey_Darl</b> - the 05/30/2009 at 5:15pm<b>muffy_da_bear</b> - the 05/30/2009 at 9:47am<b>genius_girl16</b> - the 05/29/2009 at 4:53pm<b>Kittenfluff</b> - the 05/29/2009 at 3:47pm<b>DarkMirror</b> - the 05/29/2009 at 12:39pm<b>jSOPURE</b> - the 05/29/2009 at 10:47am<b>EMR</b> - the 05/29/2009 at 10:41am<b>rukusrazor</b> - the 05/29/2009 at 10:04am

pernicious_pink's FML badges

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Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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pernicious_pink's favorite FMLs

Today, I didn't pay enough attention while sending a music file to be used in a powerful video my class-mates and I made about the Syrian civil war. Instead of a moving classical track, viewers were shown graphic scenes of devastation to the tune of Gangnam Style. FML

by Mortifiedcharityworker / 05/01/2014 at 4:10pm / Austria / Work

Today, I was in the car with my boyfriend, who was driving down the highway with the windows down. All of a sudden, everything went black. A cattle truck had sped past, and I had been hit by cow faeces travelling at 110km an hour. My boyfriend was hysterical. None of it hit him. FML

by Felicityfrank / 05/01/2014 at 10:17am / Australia (Victoria) / Animals

Today, an old guy phoned the cops on my daughter because she was drawing with chalk on the sidewalk. Apparently, he thinks it's vandalism. FML

by Anonymous / 04/28/2014 at 10:39pm / Canada (Alberta) / Kids

Today, I asked my son to go to the grocery store across the street and pick up some lettuce. He sighed and said, "Why don't you just order it on Amazon?" FML

by nh-Amazon / 04/27/2014 at 7:01pm / United States (Texas) / Kids

Today, I was walking around school alone and felt someone tap my back. I laughed and turned around to find no one was there. I felt confused when I felt the tapping again, which is when I chose to yell at the nearest person, "What?!" I later found out it was a bottle in my backpack tapping me. FML

by ohmygod582 / 04/13/2014 at 9:32pm / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at Walmart and had to use the bathroom. I sat down and farted real loud. I didn't realize someone was in there with me until I heard a voice say, "Dude, that was a good one." It was a man's voice. I then realized I was in the men's restroom. FML

by dani / 03/24/2014 at 11:39pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, my neighbor called the police for the seventh time because he's convinced I'm a vampire. He's also gotten in the habit of leaving garlic cloves in my yard. My parents come next week. FML

by Vampprobs / 03/24/2014 at 9:52pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was texting an artist friend telling her I wanted to buy her paintings; going on and on about how much I wanted it and loved the way they looked and couldn't wait to have them. I realized my phone had corrected paintings to panties. FML

by BigBlue / 03/19/2014 at 7:19pm / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, the snow in my backyard melted, revealing just how much dog shit accumulated underneath it this winter. FML

by holyshitsnacks / 03/18/2014 at 6:53pm / Canada (Ontario) / Animals

Today, I locked myself out and had to enter my house via the back door. Thinking I was an intruder, my 7-year-old daughter slammed a metal rake into the back of my head. Nice to know she can take care of herself. FML

by emergencyroom / 03/15/2014 at 8:21am / United States (Maryland) / Kids

Today, my neighbor came over and yelled at me for traumatizing her kids. What did I do? Nothing. Her kids entered my back yard, dug up my 1-month-dead hamster and freaked out. FML

by Anonymous / 03/12/2014 at 2:39am / United States (Hawaii) / Kids

Today, my 3-year-old son discovered his testicles. When I asked him what they were, he replied, "They're my balls! They make my winkie happy!" Now he won't quit singing it. FML

by Anonymous / 03/11/2014 at 11:34pm / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, I found out that my 15-year-old son is a prolific creator of My Little Pony themed hentai. I'm not a judgmental man, but he's probably going to hell. FML

by ashamed father / 03/09/2014 at 6:32pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, while on a date, I went to take a sip of my drink, but for some reason I expected a straw to be there. I ended up wiggling my tongue and mouth around my glass looking for it as I kept my eyes on my date. It must've looked like I was trying to be seductive in the creepiest way possible. FML

by cunning glassist / 03/08/2014 at 3:53pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Love

Today, I told my husband to give our dog a bath while I was at work. When I returned home, I found my dog, along with my husband, in the bath together. FML

by lacy / 03/01/2014 at 3:23am / United States (Kentucky) / Animals