patebishop

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patebishop

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 6124
  • Number of comments : 47
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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patebishop's page activity

Visits<b>armattiuzzo</b> - the 05/25/2016 at 10:51pm<b>BlazeArmy</b> - the 05/03/2016 at 7:01pm<b>stressed0317</b> - the 04/25/2016 at 12:29am<b>Clanesda</b> - the 04/14/2016 at 5:14pm<b>dom_g</b> - the 04/04/2016 at 12:42am<b>Soloman212</b> - the 03/12/2016 at 4:09am<b>operaticMortal</b> - the 02/14/2016 at 4:29pm<b>MrLufthansa</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 12:35pm<b>Zoldyck</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 2:02am<b>sugoi72</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 11:46pm<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 10:32am<b>night_fox1233</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 3:20pm<b>Kieranr10</b> - the 01/19/2016 at 3:04am<b>TheGamingGamer</b> - the 01/17/2016 at 2:09am<b>their0ny</b> - the 01/14/2016 at 11:04pm<b>missa8604</b> - the 01/09/2016 at 1:34pm<b>racello13</b> - the 01/07/2016 at 4:35pm<b>MethuselahTurtle</b> - the 01/06/2016 at 4:20pm

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patebishop's favorite FMLs

Today, having turned 18, I was eager to show my mother some of the clothes I'd like to purchase with my birthday money. I flipped my laptop open only to realise I had left a "Big Latina Booty gets a fat one" window open. Her howling screams of pleasure echoed through my kitchen. FML

by Anon / 05/07/2011 at 2:08am / United Kingdom (East Sussex) / Intimacy

Today, my identical twin sister got in trouble for sneaking out of the house to see her boyfriend. My father decided to ground both of us, because it would be "too confusing" for him otherwise. FML

by Monika / 05/05/2011 at 5:04pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids

Today, after being annoyed one too many times by my students' whiney attitudes, I accidentally blurted out, "Quit being such a bitch," to the superintendent's daughter. FML

by MathTeacher / 05/02/2011 at 10:30am / United States (Missouri) / Work

Today, I gave birth to a beautiful baby girl. My husband, the father of the baby, got a birdie on the golf course at the exact same time. FML

by Sammy / 04/27/2011 at 1:07pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I promised my boyfriend a blow job every time he does the dishes. Every dish in the house has been washed three times already. FML

by Anonymous / 04/10/2011 at 1:07am / United States (Kentucky) / Intimacy

Today, Amazon didn't deliver the present I bought my mother for Mothering Sunday, so she called me an 'Ungrateful bastard.' And about half an hour ago, I cut my thumb whilst making her lunch. She said, 'You're doing this on purpose so I feel sorry for you. Well I don't.' FML

by Trainspotting / 04/03/2011 at 9:32am / United Kingdom (Staffordshire) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was telling my dad about how I emasculated my guy friends because I can drive a stick shift while they can't. He said, "And you wonder why people think you're a lesbian." FML

by Megara / 03/15/2011 at 1:58am / United States (Kansas) / Miscellaneous

Today, my husband decided to imitate Borat and shout "Very Nice! I Excite!" while having sex. He's also decided that it was ingenious and does it every single time, the entire time. FML

by mrssagdiyev / 03/05/2011 at 9:19am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy

Today, I found my mother in tears, so I asked her what was wrong. She told me, "It's your father, he wants a divorce..." I asked if he'd met another woman, and my mom replied "No, not a woman..." FML

by Anonymous / 03/05/2011 at 6:43am / France (Alsace) / Love

Today, my parents told me that due to my lacking height and weight, I legally have to sit in a booster seat in the car from now on. I'm nineteen. FML

by Anonymous / 03/03/2011 at 6:18pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, the dog went nuts at 3am. I searched the yard with a spotlight and machete. Nothing. He may actually just be an asshole. FML

by panda / 03/03/2011 at 6:20am / Animals

Today, I had to explain to my one person on my staff why having kids aged 6 to 9 hammering in screws with the butt end of a screwdriver is neither safe, nor a good idea. FML

by AntiBobTheBuilder / 03/02/2011 at 12:22am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I paid €100 to have a tube shoved down my genitals. FML

by regretter / 02/28/2011 at 8:07pm / Intimacy

Today, I overheard my parents in the kitchen talking about how they wanted to try anal tonight. There is over three and a half feet of snow outside, leaving me no way to escape the horrible sounds and mental images yet to come. FML

by Sam / 02/27/2011 at 4:42pm / United States (Wyoming) / Intimacy

Today, I made plans with an old friend that I haven't seen in years. We agreed to meet at a diner and I told him I'd be standing outside. I watched him pull up, look right at me, then do something with his phone. Seconds later, I got a text saying "Sorry, but I'm busy today and can't make it." FML

by Angela / 02/26/2011 at 8:56pm / United States / Miscellaneous