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paintedchocolate

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paintedchocolate

5Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 12 December 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2568
  • Number of comments : 81
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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paintedchocolate's page activity

Visits<b>khoov19</b> - the 07/10/2015 at 2:15pm<b>UselessReject23</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 6:41pm<b>Mornai</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 10:01am<b>Zigstyle308</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 10:58pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 7:39pm<b>drewigi</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 6:22pm<b>je83185</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 5:33pm<b>adambomb8181</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 1:27am<b>Furby94</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 10:28pm<b>ChimeraThorne</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 2:50pm<b>KellT</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 2:21pm<b>Gunny20</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 9:48am<b>Steve95401</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 9:10am<b>bduggan101</b> - the 04/11/2015 at 12:24pm<b>MattM95</b> - the 04/11/2015 at 10:58am<b>byattwain</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 10:41pm<b>davisjenny81</b> - the 03/24/2015 at 5:23pm<b>pgmonster</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 3:06am

Fucked!<b>khoov19</b> - the 07/10/2015 at 8:15pm<b>Zigstyle308</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 4:59am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 1:40am<b>Mornai</b> - the 03/13/2015 at 4:07pm<b>Steve95401</b> - the 03/13/2015 at 1:53pm

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paintedchocolate's favorite FMLs

Today, while I was washing my hands, I sneezed so hard that I smacked my head against the faucet. I now have a lump the size of a goose egg on my head. I'm not sure if it's going to hatch, or if that's just the brain damage talking. FML

#18933385
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21214) - you deserved it (3355)

On 01/28/2012 at 12:09pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, my parents boarded the fad wagon and became Juggalos. FML

#18891757
242 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23775) - you deserved it (2884)

On 01/23/2012 at 5:33pm - misc - by unholy shit (man) - United States

Today, my toaster scared me. Again. FML

#18784375
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14324) - you deserved it (24645)

On 01/12/2012 at 11:33am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Armagh)

Today, I asked a waiter at a restaurant if I could go in the kitchen to compliment the chef. She turned out to be really pretty, so trying to be cool, I leaned back onto what I thought was a table. It turned out to be a stove, and my shirt caught fire. FML

#18750277
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10998) - you deserved it (32534)

On 01/08/2012 at 8:51pm - love - by Tiana - United States

Today, I had to bail my drunk husband out of jail after he and his best friend tried to steal a police horse from an officer. FML

#18745926
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27241) - you deserved it (3812)

On 01/08/2012 at 12:42pm - misc - by bellaskyeb - United States

Today, I ordered a pizza. I paid and tipped the pizza guy, and instead of saying goodbye, I got tongue-tied and said, "I love you, boo." FML

#18546937
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13844) - you deserved it (26672)

On 12/18/2011 at 6:36pm - misc - by Musicfreak (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I went to eat the orange I'd brought to work, but couldn't find it. After minutes searching, I found it. Nailed to the ceiling. FML

#18517264
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27163) - you deserved it (2664)

On 12/15/2011 at 1:57am - work - by Username - United States (California)

Today, Santa ran over my foot with a Segway. FML

#18435117
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23828) - you deserved it (2715)

On 12/05/2011 at 8:21am - misc - by areyouserial - United States

Today, my husband and I went to my overbearing mom's 57th birthday party. He opened his gift in front of her and said smugly, "The makeup's for your face, and the prayer book's for the fat rolls." Any hope of family peace is now lost. FML

#18414489
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21868) - you deserved it (3204)

On 12/02/2011 at 8:35pm - love - by bad blood, no shit (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, it's the second week into my new neighbors' routine. He works nights, she works days. He likes to blast out Slayer and Napalm Death all day, she likes to drunkenly sing out of tune to Adele all night. I'm on the verge of a nervous breakdown. FML

#18353086
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26379) - you deserved it (2088)

On 11/26/2011 at 1:03am - misc - by Help - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my entire family came over for thanksgiving. It went pretty well, only four family members got in a fist fight and only one cop car was called. FML

#18341850
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24550) - you deserved it (1910)

On 11/24/2011 at 9:49pm - misc - by guy - United States

Today, my boyfriend used a laser pointer to show me where I needed to lose weight. FML

#18329759
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33925) - you deserved it (5905)

On 11/23/2011 at 6:54pm - health - by chunkymonkey (woman) -

Today, I completed the arduous, nearly hour-long process of answering the eHarmony dating questionnaire, only to be told my answers were too "unique" for them to match me with anyone. I had chosen "the world" as my distance range. FML

#18138545
240 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36422) - you deserved it (5482)

On 11/02/2011 at 2:14pm - love - by DrakeScott (man) - United States (Maine)

Today, I went to the store with my girlfriend. She needed to use the bathroom so I started looking at the books. It wasn't until the manager shot me a weird look that I realized I'd wandered down too far and was looking at bridal magazines, holding tampons, dog treats, and hair spray. FML

#18036451
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24126) - you deserved it (4351)

On 10/21/2011 at 1:42am - animals - by Dv0829 - United States (Utah)

Today, my boyfriend was going down on me for the first time. He stopped just as I was about to orgasm, and asked if I could finish by myself. Apparently he'd come up with a new algorithm for the Rubik's Cube on my desk and wanted to try it out. FML

#17892959
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38121) - you deserved it (4250)

On 10/03/2011 at 12:38am - intimacy - by Kayt (woman) - United States (Virginia)



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