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paintedchocolate

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paintedchocolate

4Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 12 December 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2317
  • Number of comments : 81
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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paintedchocolate's page activity

Visits<b>Mornai</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 10:01am<b>Zigstyle308</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 10:58pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 7:39pm<b>drewigi</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 6:22pm<b>je83185</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 5:33pm<b>adambomb8181</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 1:27am<b>Furby94</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 10:28pm<b>ChimeraThorne</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 2:50pm<b>KellT</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 2:21pm<b>Gunny20</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 9:48am<b>Steve95401</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 9:10am<b>bduggan101</b> - the 04/11/2015 at 12:24pm<b>MattM95</b> - the 04/11/2015 at 10:58am<b>byattwain</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 10:41pm<b>davisjenny81</b> - the 03/24/2015 at 5:23pm<b>pgmonster</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 3:06am<b>KeithTheGreat</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 1:02pm<b>HelloMatey</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 11:26am

Fucked!<b>Zigstyle308</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 4:59am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 1:40am<b>Mornai</b> - the 03/13/2015 at 4:07pm<b>Steve95401</b> - the 03/13/2015 at 1:53pm

paintedchocolate's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of paintedchocolate's badges

paintedchocolate's favorite FMLs

Today, I was doodling randomly during a meeting at work, and I noticed my drawing was beginning to look a bit like a penis. A coworker was eyeing it so I tried to make it something else by adding... oh good, now it's a penis and balls. FML

#21072961
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34064) - you deserved it (11865)

On 02/27/2014 at 6:59am - work - by doodler - United States (Texas)

Today, I'm stuck in a hotel with my psychotic mom, all because she swore there were "demonic" noises coming from our oven. Yeah, our oven is totally possessed, you idiot. FML

#21061598
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37786) - you deserved it (4330)

On 02/15/2014 at 3:51pm - misc - by fuck my goddamn life (man) - United States

Today, my husband and I are sick. He keeps whining about how bad he feels. I'm just as sick, as well as 7 months pregnant. I've not only been taking care of his whiny ass: I've cooked, cleaned, and gone to the store several times because the tissues we had were too rough on his nose. FML

#21035436
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61389) - you deserved it (8712)

On 01/21/2014 at 8:16pm - health - by AnonWife - United Kingdom (North Lincolnshire)

Today, and every other night since my new neighbors moved in two weeks ago, their cat has been standing outside my house meowing constantly up at my window, where my cat keeps standing and meowing back. It's like a feline version of Romeo and Juliet, and I can't sleep. FML

#21024543
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45962) - you deserved it (4944)

On 01/11/2014 at 1:52pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Dominican Republic (Distrito Nacional)

Today, I was at a basketball game. Sitting in the bleachers, I looked over at my friend and said, "Number 33 has a really cute butt." The man in front of us turned around, looked me dead in the eye, and said, "Thanks." Number 33's dad was a very proud father. FML

#21017330
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46888) - you deserved it (12700)

On 01/05/2014 at 12:30am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, I watched my father attempt to light a cigar with the stove and end up burning off some hair and eyebrows. He tried to play it cool, said, "Haircuts are too expensive these days anyway." and walked out, his head smoking. This man is a college professor. FML

Today, I took an extra xanax to help with my anxiety, then went to sleep. I guess it was probably too much, because I woke up a few hours later, freaking out and panicking because I was convinced I was a bee trapped in a human body. FML

#21008430
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41108) - you deserved it (9745)

On 12/28/2013 at 4:19pm - health - by beemove (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I woke up to a loud crashing in the middle of the night. I went to investigate, but found nothing amiss. Nothing except an axe firmly wedged in my front door, that is. It's safe to say that I have no clue who did it, and that I needed a fresh pair of underwear. FML

#20999316
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44476) - you deserved it (2637)

On 12/20/2013 at 4:05pm - misc - by nopissleft (man) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, it was safe to say I started sleepwalking again, after I woke up with a mouth filled with soil and a ravaged plant. FML

#20995711
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36719) - you deserved it (3237)

On 12/17/2013 at 10:38am - health - by adventurousnightsbutnotinagoodway (woman) - Netherlands (Zuid-Holland)

Today, I would like to thank the program designer that put "Set as home page" directly under "Remove from history". FML

#20991949
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38034) - you deserved it (10119)

On 12/14/2013 at 1:38am - misc - by The_Rest_of_the_Story (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I learned that just because you live on a different continent, it doesn't mean your mother won't come knocking when you are having sex. FML

#20989004
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53447) - you deserved it (4622)

On 12/11/2013 at 2:59pm - intimacy - by hi Mum - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I was proud when I started a confrontation with my best friend's brother because he is a sexist pig who treats women like crap. Six hours later my pride was gone: I made him an after-sex sandwich. FML

#20975509
100 comments

Today, I had a nightmare in which I was haunted by the ghost of my foreskin. I then spent the whole day moping around, wondering what my life would've been like if my parents hadn't opted to slice it off. Will I see you in heaven, long-lost ghostly foreskin? FML

#20972170
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31211) - you deserved it (14794)

On 11/27/2013 at 3:44am - health - by MissYouPieceOfSkin (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my mum staggered home, piss drunk. When I tried to walk her to her room, she shoved me away and cursed at me for being a "goody two-shoes". She then slurred "I fucked your mum", and informed me that my mum is a skank. That's good to know, mum. FML

#20958646
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42122) - you deserved it (2859)

On 11/15/2013 at 12:49pm - misc - by mummer11 (woman) - Ireland

Today, while my hometown mayor becomes a world-famous crackhead and douche-bag, here in the UK it has come to this: when people hear my accent and ask me if I'm American, it's less embarrassing just to say, "Yeah", rather than admit I'm Canadian. FML

#20958357
26 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37454) - you deserved it (6350)

On 11/15/2013 at 2:05am - misc - by unproud (man) - United Kingdom (Luton)



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  • It's the weekend so let's plaster on a fake smile and plough through this shit one more time. Sorry, I was channelling Bill Hicks there. I'll start again. Hi everyone, how are you doing? This week…

Friday 29 May 2015

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