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paintedchocolate

Offline (the 01/05/2016 at 10:55pm) | Search for a member

paintedchocolate

5Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 12 December 1995 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3272
  • Number of comments : 83
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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paintedchocolate's page activity

Visits<b>meatball4122</b> - the 09/21/2015 at 3:11pm<b>blazerman</b> - the 09/20/2015 at 2:15pm<b>khoov19</b> - the 07/10/2015 at 2:15pm<b>UselessReject23</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 6:41pm<b>Mornai</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 10:01am<b>Zigstyle308</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 10:58pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 7:39pm<b>drewigi</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 6:22pm<b>je83185</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 5:33pm<b>adambomb8181</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 1:27am<b>Furby94</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 10:28pm<b>ChimeraThorne</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 2:50pm<b>KellT</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 2:21pm<b>Gunny20</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 9:48am<b>Steve95401</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 9:10am<b>bduggan101</b> - the 04/11/2015 at 12:24pm<b>MattM95</b> - the 04/11/2015 at 10:58am<b>byattwain</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 10:41pm

Fucked!<b>khoov19</b> - the 07/10/2015 at 8:15pm<b>Zigstyle308</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 4:59am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 1:40am<b>Mornai</b> - the 03/13/2015 at 4:07pm<b>Steve95401</b> - the 03/13/2015 at 1:53pm

paintedchocolate's FML badges

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You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

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You have thumbed 5000 comments.

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paintedchocolate's favorite FMLs

Today, I sat in on a university-level physics lecture, listening to my hyped-up co-students approximating the hypothetical situation of the Sun consisting of gerbils. The conversation then continued towards how much better energy/mass ratio the gerbil-sun would have compared to the actual star. FML

#21258867
100 comments

Today, my girlfriend went shopping at Victoria's Secret with me. While she was in the fitting room, her parents walked by and saw me. They don't approve of the store, so I panicked and told them I was considering becoming a woman. FML

#21255419
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45831) - you deserved it (13392)

On 09/09/2014 at 11:16pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I'm staying with my grandma and her older sister while my parents are away. It's been two hours and so far they've popped vicodins, talked about banging Alex Trebek, and had a farting contest. FML

#21253639
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37860) - you deserved it (4208)

On 09/07/2014 at 11:11am - misc - by imgonnadie (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I had to take bus to work, because yesterday my car was hit by a bus. While standing there, I noticed the driver kept looking back at me every now and then. As I went to get off, he looks at me again and says: "Sorry..." FML

#21252700
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47908) - you deserved it (3098)

On 09/05/2014 at 10:36pm - work - by crop circle galore - United States

Today, while my teacher was demonstrating how to use the ultrasound equipment, we all figured out that I'm pregnant. FML

#21245451
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55138) - you deserved it (11234)

On 08/25/2014 at 10:37pm - health - by whotouchedyou1 - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend called me in tears, convinced that he found me in a porn video online. It wasn't me. And when I finally got him to give me the web address, I too started crying at the realization of how fat he thinks I am. FML

#21243572
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55754) - you deserved it (5558)

On 08/23/2014 at 2:26am - intimacy - by confidence taken - United States (Mississippi)

Today, my boss pretty much told me that I'm too ugly to meet clients, and should stay in the office doing the paperwork. So basically, I'm a modern day Hunchback of Notre Dame. FML

#21232284
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40159) - you deserved it (3668)

On 08/08/2014 at 2:13am - work - by Anonymous - Singapore

Today, I woke up from a horrible nightmare. What was it about? Me accidentally scratching a non-stick pan with my utility knife. FML

Today, I went to a bookstore to get "The Grapes of Wrath". I have a problem with controlling the volume of my voice, so once at the counter, I accidentally said quite loudly, "WHERE ARE THE ANGRY GRAPES?" FML

#21217858
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38676) - you deserved it (12906)

On 07/22/2014 at 11:36pm - misc - by Face fucking palm - United States (Georgia)

Today, my road rage got so out of hand that I'm now actually inclined to honk obnoxiously at my computer when it's being slow. FML

#21204164
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31592) - you deserved it (16383)

On 07/09/2014 at 4:49pm - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I woke up to an old lady right outside my open window, saying "Hello in there! Are you sleepy?" I was so startled that I answered her. She screamed. Turns out she's my neighbour's elderly mother, didn't know I was in there, and was talking to my cat. FML

#21201617
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45193) - you deserved it (4488)

On 07/07/2014 at 11:59am - animals - by ADanceWithDavos (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I heard my husband say from outside, "Seriously Dan, what could go wrong?" This was followed a few seconds later by a bang and screaming. Turns out he'd tried to smash his head through a wooden plank like a martial artist and failed. He ended up with splinters and a concussion. FML

#21182978
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43196) - you deserved it (5125)

On 06/21/2014 at 11:15am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I flexed so hard for a selfie, I gave myself a hernia. FML

#21138987
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23959) - you deserved it (68733)

On 05/13/2014 at 7:46pm - health - by ShutTheFuCupcake (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my boyfriend surprised me by coming home early. He walked in on me sitting on the toilet, singing full volume to my cat as I took a crap. FML

#21135914
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44823) - you deserved it (13147)

On 05/10/2014 at 6:11pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Vastra Gotaland)



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