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paintedchocolate

Offline (the 06/10/2015 at 1:02am) | Search for a member

paintedchocolate

4Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 12 December 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2450
  • Number of comments : 81
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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paintedchocolate's page activity

Visits<b>UselessReject23</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 6:41pm<b>Mornai</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 10:01am<b>Zigstyle308</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 10:58pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 7:39pm<b>drewigi</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 6:22pm<b>je83185</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 5:33pm<b>adambomb8181</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 1:27am<b>Furby94</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 10:28pm<b>ChimeraThorne</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 2:50pm<b>KellT</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 2:21pm<b>Gunny20</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 9:48am<b>Steve95401</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 9:10am<b>bduggan101</b> - the 04/11/2015 at 12:24pm<b>MattM95</b> - the 04/11/2015 at 10:58am<b>byattwain</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 10:41pm<b>davisjenny81</b> - the 03/24/2015 at 5:23pm<b>pgmonster</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 3:06am<b>KeithTheGreat</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 1:02pm

Fucked!<b>Zigstyle308</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 4:59am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 1:40am<b>Mornai</b> - the 03/13/2015 at 4:07pm<b>Steve95401</b> - the 03/13/2015 at 1:53pm

paintedchocolate's FML badges

The Thumb returns

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

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paintedchocolate's favorite FMLs

Today, my neighbor declared his love for me via "the medium of interpretative dance." FML

#17641775
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27609) - you deserved it (3004)

On 09/02/2011 at 2:54am - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my wife compared me to Sid the sloth from Ice Age. Same smile, same eyes, same belly, same big feet. FML

#17629436
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25855) - you deserved it (5341)

On 08/31/2011 at 12:25pm - love - by faceless_sailor8 - United States

Today, I found my husband Googling Morse Code. He thinks his farts are trying to communicate with him. FML

#17611865
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31648) - you deserved it (3519)

On 08/29/2011 at 11:38am - health - by KJL - United States

Today, I had to take my dog to the vet for him to be put to sleep. I could feel the cold, hard shaft of irony slide its way up my ass and slowly fuck me senseless with every step I took on this beautiful National Dog Day. FML

#17586114
233 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31691) - you deserved it (5460)

On 08/26/2011 at 1:49pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I had to say "Put away your burrito," "that ruler is not a light saber," and "stop making dog noises" all in the same sentence at work. I teach Advanced Placement Calculus to high school seniors. FML

#17526799
262 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31698) - you deserved it (4783)

On 08/20/2011 at 3:42am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I had a completely normal work day. Other than the fact that my boss dressed up like the lead singer from KISS and hit us with a foam sword at random. My boss is 49. FML

#17176050
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28632) - you deserved it (6250)

On 07/19/2011 at 11:19am - work - by Bill Harrison - United States

Today, I had to bail my dad out of jail, for beating up my boyfriend, for sleeping with my mom. FML

#17089969
517 comments

I agree, your life sucks (140914) - you deserved it (7998)

On 07/13/2011 at 2:32am - intimacy - by whyme102008 - United States (Texas)

Today, I discovered a tick on my penis. After a long battle, he finally let go. Four hours later I'm in the hospital. My penis is twice the normal size. I may have won the battle but lost the war. FML

#16639445
450 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51013) - you deserved it (5839)

On 06/13/2011 at 2:25am - intimacy - by John jacob - United States (Georgia)

Today, I saw a woman run down my street screaming, "Fuck you cops! I can drive under the influence if I want to!" It took me a second to realize it was my mother. FML

#16474078
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44426) - you deserved it (3136)

On 06/02/2011 at 9:07pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I accidentally said, "Yes, Sir." to my female teacher. I then apologized by saying, "Sorry, Sir." FML

#16418676
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35539) - you deserved it (15719)

On 05/30/2011 at 2:14pm - misc - by OopsKid (man) - France

Today, it was my birthday. Some 17 year olds will receive cars as presents from their parents. Mine, however, booked me a plot in the local graveyard. FML

#16342840
312 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45003) - you deserved it (4762)

On 05/25/2011 at 1:44pm - misc - by Brilliant... (woman) - United Kingdom (West Sussex)

Today, I killed a pigeon. It choked to death on a piece of bread I threw its way. FML

#16188674
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37781) - you deserved it (6966) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 05/15/2011 at 2:19pm - misc - by bouda - France (Centre)

Today, I woke up so pissed off that I yelled at my cereal. FML

#16128268
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33845) - you deserved it (14914)

On 05/11/2011 at 10:33am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my phone alarm woke me up. It had fallen under my boyfriend's bed. Naked, I got on all fours to retrieve it. My boyfriend's dog stuck his nose in my ass. FML

#16101317
251 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43560) - you deserved it (18023)

On 05/09/2011 at 2:08am - intimacy - by coldwetnose (woman) - United States

Today, I work at McDonald's. The entire crew, myself included, got visibly excited that we had new trash cans and dust pans. FML

#16063941
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33638) - you deserved it (7649)

On 05/06/2011 at 1:15am - work - by Tyler (man) - United States (Ohio)



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