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paintbullits

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paintbullits
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  • Number of visits : 53
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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paintbullits's favorite FMLs

Today, at my job as a bouncer at a music venue, a guy got his nose broken in a rowdy mosh pit. When I went to help him up and see if he was okay, he said, "It was an accident, please don't kick me out," but the word "please" came out as a hot spray of his blood across my face. FML

#21095237
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35490) - you deserved it (2786)

On 03/24/2014 at 2:53pm - work - by bloodyhell - United States (Colorado)

Today, I found out my mother has enough toys to open a sex shop. FML

#20499258
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38296) - you deserved it (4996)

On 02/09/2013 at 7:00am - intimacy - by Lois - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, I realized my girlfriend has way more friends than I do. How did I realize this? She called me to tell me she was at the beach with her friends and how much fun she was having. I was playing WoW in my room, and my friends don't answer my texts. FML

#9122950
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11241) - you deserved it (22003)

On 03/16/2010 at 1:12am - misc - by LonelyBoy (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was completely wasted at my bachelor party, and my friends thought it would be funny to put sodium nitrate on my penis. Sodium nitrate makes your skin dark purple for a couple of weeks. My wedding is next week and my fiancee has never seen me naked. FML

#3418907
323 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58794) - you deserved it (16909)

On 07/02/2009 at 2:32am - intimacy - by purpledick (man) - Mexico (Nuevo Leon)



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Friday 18 April 2014

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