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outoftown

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outoftown
  • Town/Country : Elsewhere, US
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1167
  • Number of comments : 1208
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About outoftown : Yes, I'm a newbie.
Update: Now, not so new.
Profile pic: Warren Zevon said it best.

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YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

I never take things to heart

Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.

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You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

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outoftown's favorite FMLs

Today, a parent was too busy texting to notice her child had run in front of a moving truck. She did however see me grab the child's backpack to yank him back out of traffic. She then screamed at me for "manhandling" her child and demanded I be fired. It's not even my school; I'm a part time sub. FML

#20129237
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22810) - you deserved it (951)

On 10/22/2012 at 11:51pm - work - by bad samaritan (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my mother told me that my dead grandmother speaks to her. How? When she's thinking of her while brushing her teeth, her electric toothbrush will suddenly stop buzzing and this tells her her mother is communicating with her. FML

#20127529
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11424) - you deserved it (825)

On 10/21/2012 at 10:52pm - misc - by smdh - United States

Today, I tried to tell my best friend how wrong she is to be dating a married man, whose wife happens to be pregnant with their first child. Our talk ended with her calling me a "meddling, frigid bitch" and me being told this is why I can't get laid. FML

#20125357
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18858) - you deserved it (1626)

On 10/20/2012 at 2:50pm - misc - by Dillyduzit (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I received another death threat for teaching evolution in college. I'm a geology teacher. FML

#20121974
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18688) - you deserved it (1530)

On 10/18/2012 at 12:58am - work - by satanworshipper - United States (Florida)

Today, for the second time, I met the man I'm having an arranged marriage with in 3 months. I'd previously met him last night, while he was mugging me. FML

#20120711
251 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30437) - you deserved it (1983)

On 10/17/2012 at 6:15am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia

Today, a one-eyed drunken homeless man followed me around the store I work at, screaming at me because I turned down his sexual advances. My managers and coworkers wouldn't kick him out because they thought it was funny. FML

#20119087
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18756) - you deserved it (1216)

On 10/16/2012 at 12:48am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, the police searched my house because my neighbors thought we were aiming a gun with laser sight at them. We were only getting our daft dog to chase a laser light around; we don't even own any guns. FML

#20117729
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14297) - you deserved it (1515)

On 10/15/2012 at 4:33am - misc - by triple l (woman) - United States

Today, after weeks of coming home to find my furniture all tipped over, thinking the place was haunted, and accepting my boyfriend's offers to come over and "comfort" me, I came home from work early. I found my boyfriend in the kitchen, kicking over all the chairs. FML

#20116490
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12694) - you deserved it (5796)

On 10/14/2012 at 1:03pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Estonia

Today, while I was using my computer, my cat ran up to the power strip, looked me in the eyes, and hit the power switch, turning everything off. She does this quite often. FML

#20116072
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17441) - you deserved it (3147)

On 10/14/2012 at 3:00am - animals - by stop it ninja - United States (Virginia)

Today, I had to pay my bus fare in very small change. After carefully counting out coins under the withering glares of a bus-load of people, I quickly slid them into the machine, and somehow ended up jamming it. FML

#20112067
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13175) - you deserved it (3474)

On 10/11/2012 at 1:49pm - money - by iblamethetories - United Kingdom (Essex)

Today, my 14-year-old step-daughter announced that she is 4 months pregnant. The father is my 15-year-old son. FML

#20111886
528 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62465) - you deserved it (6322)

On 10/11/2012 at 10:30am - kids - by wdunn69733 - United States (Georgia)

Today, the girl I'm dating mentioned that she'd had her healthy wisdom teeth removed to prevent her future children from having wisdom teeth. I laughed. She wasn't joking. FML

Today, I found out why my cat hasn't been coming home for regular meals. Apparently, my elderly next door neighbour has forgotten that her cat is dead and puts food out for it every morning. My cat is exploiting her by impersonating her dead cat to get better food. My cat is an asshole. FML

#20110144
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20707) - you deserved it (3456)

On 10/10/2012 at 4:43am - animals - by assholecat (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my stepdaughter called to say hello and to give me a warning: she will do whatever it takes to keep me from having a baby with her dad, including pushing me down the stairs. I'm 12 weeks pregnant, and we were going to tell her this weekend. I'm now petrified of a 10-year-old. FML

Today, I was cooking something I knew would make a lot of smoke, so I asked my teenage daughter to tape a bag over the smoke detector. She said she did, so I cooked; the alarm went off and firemen came. She hadn't taped over the smoke detector, she'd taped it over the doorbell. FML

#20106895
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15752) - you deserved it (2868)

On 10/08/2012 at 1:31am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)



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