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outoftown

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outoftown
  • Town/Country : Elsewhere, US
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1177
  • Number of comments : 1208
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About outoftown : Yes, I'm a newbie.
Update: Now, not so new.
Profile pic: Warren Zevon said it best.

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outoftown's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

I never take things to heart

Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.

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You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

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outoftown's favorite FMLs

Today, I'm sharing a hotel room with co-workers on a business trip. The walls are paper-thin, you could hear a pin drop, and I'm trying to make my explosive diarrhea as close to silent as possible. FML

#20431241
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28066) - you deserved it (1763)

On 12/30/2012 at 1:14am - work - by avoid the sour cream - United States

Today, I came home to find a pregnancy test in my trashcan. I live alone with my boyfriend and I'm not pregnant. FML

#20430574
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32351) - you deserved it (1939)

On 12/29/2012 at 7:22pm - love - by melas303 - United States

Today, at the hospital I work at, I had to deliver my best friend's baby. I later found out that my ex boyfriend was the father. Normally this wouldn't faze me, but it did because we broke up last month. FML

#20429423
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36045) - you deserved it (1847)

On 12/29/2012 at 3:25am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my girlfriend donated most of my book collection because she got me a Kindle for Christmas. Some were signed, including my Harry Potters. FML

#20427017
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46942) - you deserved it (2630)

On 12/27/2012 at 11:31pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I looked at my neighbor's empty lawn; he's an old guy and he usually has the best Christmas lights. We knew he might not be able to do them this year, so I felt bad and I did them for him. Later, a neighbor asked about them and I told her that I helped out. She said, "You do know he died, right?" FML

#20411217
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26784) - you deserved it (13110)

On 12/21/2012 at 11:00am - misc - by Syd - United States (Texas)

Today, my neighbor installed a large radio that loudly plays Christmas music 24/7. When I called in a complaint to the police department they told me to, "get in the Christmas spirit." FML

#20404496
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24007) - you deserved it (7907)

On 12/17/2012 at 9:28pm - misc - by James (man) - United States

Today, I had to get to class at 9:00 to take a test. I woke up at 6:00, and figured I could wait a few minutes before getting ready. The next thing I knew, it was 10:30. FML

#20200420
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16871) - you deserved it (17315)

On 12/11/2012 at 1:16pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my roommate pressed "snooze" on his alarm 14 times. I counted. FML

#20200321
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15489) - you deserved it (1416)

On 12/11/2012 at 10:57am - misc - by roommateprobssss:( - United States

Today, in my AP Biology class, a student informed us she'd read that Antarctica had completely melted due to global warming, to which my friend gushed, "Yeah! It's been melted for, like, months." FML

#20193921
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14593) - you deserved it (1118)

On 12/06/2012 at 3:47pm - misc - by bieberslayer (woman) - United States

Today, as I was about to walk across the street, a girl in front of me who clearly wasn't paying attention to the traffic, almost got run over. I grabbed her arm and jumped back. She was fine. I fell and fractured my arm and wrist. FML

#20182568
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17334) - you deserved it (1283)

On 11/28/2012 at 12:43pm - health - by williebees - United States (Texas)

Today, I was walking home, when I realized I didn't have my phone on me. After retracing my steps, I realized that I'd been listening to music from my phone the entire time. FML

#20177683
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5002) - you deserved it (17141)

On 11/25/2012 at 2:12am - misc - by Jocelyn - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I've been on duty at the hospital for just three hours so far, and I've already pulled five carving forks out of four different people. Good job, everybody. FML

#20174027
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17411) - you deserved it (1018)

On 11/22/2012 at 4:03pm - work - by DocFUCKINGHATESSTUPIDPEOPLE (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, while working as a massage therapist, a client had me work on a very specific knot in his shoulder. He also happened to have a very detailed, very realistic tattoo of the crucifixion on his shoulder. I just spent 45 minutes violating Jesus. FML

#20173351
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14023) - you deserved it (2538)

On 11/22/2012 at 1:50am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was messing around with my wife. I grabbed her boobs and said, "Honk honk". Unbeknownst to me, my daughter saw it. Now my 3-year-old girl runs around honking everyone. Even her grandparents. FML

#20172916
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8786) - you deserved it (22145)

On 11/21/2012 at 8:20pm - kids - by piemasterzim (man) - Canada

Today, my friends and I were playing truth or dare game. It was late and we were drunk, so they dared me to run naked into my neighbor's yard while yelling, "Help! The pixies took my penis!" I ran screaming right into their big family reunion. FML

#20172584
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5386) - you deserved it (26380)

On 11/21/2012 at 4:06pm - misc - by nekkidness (man) - United States (North Carolina)



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