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outoftown

Offline (the 06/17/2014 at 6:18am) | Search for a member

outoftown

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4331
  • Number of comments : 1578
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About outoftown : Yes, I'm a newbie.
Update: Now, not so new.
Update: I came, I lurked, I did a little commenting. I like it here!

outoftown's page activity

Visits<b>yoursmileishawt</b> - the 08/14/2014 at 12:15am<b>dingleberriet</b> - the 08/06/2014 at 8:09am<b>KMoBear</b> - the 07/02/2014 at 5:31am<b>xivoricbutterfly</b> - the 06/27/2014 at 2:10pm<b>teotsi</b> - the 06/08/2014 at 9:50am<b>oops993</b> - the 06/04/2014 at 9:47am<b>Tinad01</b> - the 05/20/2014 at 7:02pm<b>conman531</b> - the 05/20/2014 at 2:55am<b>chelseaalise</b> - the 05/19/2014 at 10:46pm<b>Alhamdulilah</b> - the 05/14/2014 at 3:40pm<b>ChloeLentin</b> - the 05/14/2014 at 3:13am<b>persianninja</b> - the 05/14/2014 at 12:31am<b>tagallopes</b> - the 05/13/2014 at 9:26pm<b>nastag</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 11:56pm<b>Roskie</b> - the 05/04/2014 at 8:20pm<b>tobert</b> - the 05/01/2014 at 6:21pm<b>Just_Ya</b> - the 04/29/2014 at 5:46pm<b>fuzzy101606</b> - the 04/18/2014 at 10:14pm

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outoftown's favorite FMLs

Today, my overly-attached 14-year-old cat wanted attention while I was in a heated Skype argument with my girlfriend. Worked up from the fight, I raised my voice and said, "Not now, go away!" He ran to his little bed, had a heart attack and died. I was a complete dick to my cat in his last moments. FML

#21108570
352 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65078) - you deserved it (32546)

On 04/09/2014 at 2:40pm - animals - by Brody89 (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I found out that the squeaking I've heard for the past three months, that I thought was my guinea pig, is actually my girlfriend cheating on me with my older brother. FML

#21105078
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66829) - you deserved it (6390)

On 04/05/2014 at 10:27am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my dad had a chat with my fiancé, telling him he can do better than me, and to think carefully before going through with our wedding. FML

#21104564
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43093) - you deserved it (3719)

On 04/04/2014 at 5:31pm - love - by fuck off, dad (woman) - Colombia

Today, my mom brought her sleazy boyfriend home. He took one look at me, swatted my ass, and said, "It runs in the family." My mom just laughed and winked at me, and mouthed, "He's a keeper!" FML

#21103666
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56645) - you deserved it (3927)

On 04/03/2014 at 1:22pm - love - by wiona (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I have pink eye. Four weeks ago I had scabies. I'm an elementary school teacher, and I'm apparently under attack from biological weapons: my students. FML

#21102371
94 comments

Today, I was stuck in the elevator for almost two hours. Where was the elevator mechanic? Next to me in the elevator. FML

#21098357
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41959) - you deserved it (2935)

On 03/28/2014 at 4:42am - work - by ClaustrophobicNightmares - Saudi Arabia (Ar Riyad)

Today, I was at Walmart and had to use the bathroom. I sat down and farted real loud. I didn't realize someone was in there with me until I heard a voice say, "Dude, that was a good one." It was a man's voice. I then realized I was in the men's restroom. FML

#21095689
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46942) - you deserved it (11863)

On 03/24/2014 at 11:39pm - misc - by dani (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I ripped my old, worn underwear while trying to pick a wedgie in public. Half ended up in my hand. FML

#21095019
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30528) - you deserved it (19253)

On 03/24/2014 at 8:39am - misc - by pantyripper (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I learned that most teenagers would rather grab free candy from the broken vending machine than help the guy stuck underneath it get free. FML

#21093947
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41232) - you deserved it (4655)

On 03/23/2014 at 12:05am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my mother taught my 98-year-old great-uncle to knock on the wall if he needs us. He can't remember who we are; but every hour he can remember to knock to ask, "Is it breakfast yet?" FML

#21089766
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36114) - you deserved it (3728)

On 03/18/2014 at 4:36am - misc - by can't sleep - United States (Indiana)

Today, I found out what it feels like to be slapped in the face with a potted cactus. FML

#21088237
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41776) - you deserved it (5750)

On 03/16/2014 at 3:28pm - health - by thanksdad (man) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I locked myself out and had to enter my house via the back door. Thinking I was an intruder, my 7-year-old daughter slammed a metal rake into the back of my head. Nice to know she can take care of herself. FML

#21087156
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45866) - you deserved it (8631)

On 03/15/2014 at 8:21am - kids - by emergencyroom (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my 3-year-old son discovered his testicles. When I asked him what they were, he replied, "They're my balls! They make my winkie happy!" Now he won't quit singing it. FML

#21084464
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37836) - you deserved it (5511)

On 03/11/2014 at 11:34pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I had my first job interview after three years of unemployment. I was so happy that I broke down into tears the moment I saw the interviewer. Great first impression. FML

#21083095
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37787) - you deserved it (5910)

On 03/10/2014 at 12:38pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, I started at my new job. My manager, upon meeting me, hugged me and sniffed my neck, then commented that I smelled "natural" and told me how much he loves that. I have to work with this creep until god knows when. FML

#21081278
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37260) - you deserved it (3495)

On 03/08/2014 at 12:19pm - work - by kittykat033 (woman) - United States (Hawaii)



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