About outoftown : Yes, I'm a newbie.
Update: Now, not so new.
Profile pic: Warren Zevon said it best.
YDI master
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
I never take things to heart
Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.
I’m your new creative director
You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.
Today, while on the bus, I took out my breath spray. The elderly lady beside me thought it was pepper spray. She panicked and started screaming, which culminated in the man near her punching me in the jaw. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15999) - you deserved it (1207)
On 08/23/2012 at 12:14pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (West Virginia)
Today, I had a hard time taking a dump. Before flushing, I noticed two pennies and a dime incrusted in my turd. It seems that yesterday, while drunk, I swallowed some change. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4320) - you deserved it (18124)
On 08/23/2012 at 2:54am - money - by chrisbravo - United States
Today, I discovered that it's an hour and 45 minutes quicker to get the bus to work, rather than the train. I've worked there for six years. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13386) - you deserved it (8666)
On 08/23/2012 at 2:15am - work - by ihatemondays - United Kingdom
Today, I packed my bags and left for the airport. When I passed through security, the X-ray scanner discovered that my cat had also come along for the ride. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18043) - you deserved it (2085) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Today, I got stumped by a childproof door. Twice. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9763) - you deserved it (4427)
On 08/21/2012 at 8:37pm - misc - by mr_flarpin (man) - United States (Maine)
Today, I found out that my new husband is expecting two children: ours, due in January, and our 16-year-old neighbor's, due in March. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48953) - you deserved it (2183)
On 08/18/2012 at 1:09am - misc - by Just_Me_88 - United States (Oregon)
Today, my family and I went to the movie theater. There weren't enough free seats near the front, so I sat a few rows back with my grandpa. He kept throwing our snacks at my parents' heads all through the movie. He claimed he'd been asleep the whole time, and I'm now grounded. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19509) - you deserved it (1620)
On 08/17/2012 at 8:39pm - misc - by wow, thanks (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, I got a phone call out of the blue from a young man, who screamed that he was going to kill me for sleeping with his fiancée. I told him I am a 49-year-old man who hasn't been laid since my wife passed away, four years ago. He stammered, shouted, "Well she was a slut too" and hung up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25277) - you deserved it (927)
On 08/17/2012 at 8:20pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States
Today, I bought the only cat on Earth that doesn't like chasing after a laser dot. Goodbye, hours of sick, sick entertainment. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8843) - you deserved it (14882)
On 08/17/2012 at 7:33pm - animals - by lonelygirl (woman) - United States (Utah)
Today, at age eighteen, I finished moving out of my parents' house and into my own. The only person to even remotely give a shit was my sister, and that was only because I was taking the cat with me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13716) - you deserved it (1297)
On 08/17/2012 at 3:55pm - misc - by CollegeBound (man) - United States (New York)
Today, my boyfriend was coming home after a month of being away. When I heard him knock on the door, I rushed to open it and jumped into his arms for a hug. It wasn't him; it was the mailman. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15188) - you deserved it (4765)
On 08/17/2012 at 12:08am - love - by SquishFish - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, my fiancée showed me her wedding plans. It will be themed on one of her video games, the best man will be dressed as an alien warlord, and the vows talk about how we'll beat the odds and be blessed by the "Goddess Kalahira". Apparently, I have no say in this. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16701) - you deserved it (4702)
On 08/14/2012 at 6:50pm - love - by cestquoicebordel?? (man) - France
Today, my cheating, psycho asscricket of an ex texted me and asked me back out. I said no, and didn't think any more of it, at least until an hour later, when I looked out my window, only to see him smearing a bag of dog crap all over my porch. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17262) - you deserved it (199)
On 08/14/2012 at 11:02am - love - by WELLFUCKYOUTOO (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, it's my birthday. Today is also the day my grandma died, six years ago. Since then, I get to sit through any sort of attempted celebration while my mom sobs and drinks herself into a stupor in the background. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18279) - you deserved it (866)
On 08/14/2012 at 3:57am - misc - by BirthdayFail (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, yet again, I had to dye my hair brown in advance of the new school year, because my school doesn't allow "unapproved" colors, even if they're natural. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22150) - you deserved it (1324)
On 08/13/2012 at 1:50pm - misc - by youmothERFUCKErs (woman) - United States
Monday 20 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog 
Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
