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outoftown

Offline (the 06/17/2014 at 6:18am) | Search for a member

outoftown

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3914
  • Number of comments : 1578
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About outoftown : Yes, I'm a newbie.
Update: Now, not so new.
Update: I came, I lurked, I did a little commenting. I like it here!

outoftown's page activity

Visits<b>KMoBear</b> - the 07/02/2014 at 5:31am<b>xivoricbutterfly</b> - the 06/27/2014 at 2:10pm<b>teotsi</b> - the 06/08/2014 at 9:50am<b>oops993</b> - the 06/04/2014 at 9:47am<b>Tinad01</b> - the 05/20/2014 at 7:02pm<b>conman531</b> - the 05/20/2014 at 2:55am<b>chelseaalise</b> - the 05/19/2014 at 10:46pm<b>Alhamdulilah</b> - the 05/14/2014 at 3:40pm<b>ChloeLentin</b> - the 05/14/2014 at 3:13am<b>persianninja</b> - the 05/14/2014 at 12:31am<b>tagallopes</b> - the 05/13/2014 at 9:26pm<b>nastag</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 11:56pm<b>Roskie</b> - the 05/04/2014 at 8:20pm<b>tobert</b> - the 05/01/2014 at 6:21pm<b>Just_Ya</b> - the 04/29/2014 at 5:46pm<b>fuzzy101606</b> - the 04/18/2014 at 10:14pm<b>Conlaoch</b> - the 04/12/2014 at 3:28am<b>earmuffs</b> - the 04/09/2014 at 12:06pm

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outoftown's favorite FMLs

Today, my wife got all excited when she saw the elevator we were in had a feature to make it go sideways. I didn't have the heart to tell her they were the buttons to open and close the door. FML

#21137819
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46536) - you deserved it (6071)

On 05/12/2014 at 3:41pm - misc - by Jarool - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my computer crashed and lost all of its data while I was making a back up. FML

#21134602
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39256) - you deserved it (3748)

On 05/09/2014 at 1:35am - misc - by mlowy - Azerbaijan (Baki)

Today, it's five days until my wedding and I still can't tell my bride apart from her twin sister. They share clothes, have the same haircut, and they even take turns flirting with me to "catch me off guard" because they think it's hilarious to trick me. I'm scared I'll marry the wrong one. FML

#21133982
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63391) - you deserved it (8077)

On 05/08/2014 at 9:55am - love - by STOP (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I retrieved the wrong luggage from an airport carousel. I'm now the owner of two water-bras, a false beard, a bag of cat litter, and some anal beads. I am afraid to get in touch with the original owner. FML

#21133607
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37781) - you deserved it (5579)

On 05/07/2014 at 9:25pm - misc - by BaggedDown (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my art teacher showed off a painting of his name he got in Japan. I can read Japanese, and it actually says "Old idiot". I really don't want to break it to him. FML

#21130223
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45111) - you deserved it (4731)

On 05/04/2014 at 2:12am - misc - by Sam (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my wrists were hurting really bad while working the production line. I was told to let my supervisor know so he can help accommodate it. Both supervisors responded by ending my employment there to make sure I don't suffer long term damage. FML

Today, after an entire year spent in physical therapy recovering from three knee surgeries, I finally returned to doing light agility exercises and running on a treadmill. When I told my therapist I had never been so happy and proud, he responded with, "This usually only takes 5 months, pussy." FML

#21122058
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42228) - you deserved it (7006)

On 04/24/2014 at 7:42pm - health - by AnonymousAndSad (man) - United States (Iowa)

Today, the man sitting next to me on the train tried to sneak a dead cat into my bag while I was sleeping. FML

#21121912
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42197) - you deserved it (3515)

On 04/24/2014 at 4:52pm - animals - by now have a cat - United States (Illinois)

Today, my toddler found my daughter's recorder from 3rd grade and figured out how to play the highest pitch note. Of course, my daughter pulls out her trombone to have a jam session. And I'm out of ibuprofen. FML

#21121712
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35846) - you deserved it (4918)

On 04/24/2014 at 11:28am - kids - by missmom83 (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my 808 area code phone number has yet again been mistaken for a 1-800 number. I've been getting phone calls at three in the morning from people on the east coast who are trying to return their shoes. They want to speak to my supervisor because I "don't sound professional enough." FML

Today, I accidentally walked in on my mom cheating on my step-dad with my real dad. FML

Today, I decided to be nice and pay a visit to my grandma. We ended up playing Scrabble. In between passing wind that smelled like rotting eggs, she kept playing the filthiest words she could, and yelled at me whenever I checked to see if they were in the Scrabble dictionary. FML

#21118282
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35700) - you deserved it (4666)

On 04/20/2014 at 5:38pm - misc - by Anonymous - Slovenia (Domzale Commune)

Today, my guide dog sneezed so hard that it slammed its head on the floor and knocked itself out. I have to trust this dog with my life. FML

#21117679
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50381) - you deserved it (4429)

On 04/20/2014 at 12:03am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Idaho)

Today, I took my kids to an Easter party hosted by a local church. The nice lady in charge told the kids, "Jesus died, but He rose to life again!" My 9 year old screamed, "LIKE A ZOMBIE!" FML

#21116666
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40308) - you deserved it (7932)

On 04/18/2014 at 8:14pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my house was robbed. My two 70-pound German Shepherds obeyed me when I told them to attack. They also obeyed the robber when he said, "Sit". FML

#21113538
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51865) - you deserved it (4690)

On 04/15/2014 at 8:08am - animals - by stupiddog (man) - United States (California)



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  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

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