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oranjeguice

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oranjeguice

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 8 November 1992 (21 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2076
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About oranjeguice :

I ride unicycles.

oranjeguice's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

oranjeguice's favorite FMLs

Today, the novelty of shaving a heart into my pubic hair for my wife vanished, when I woke up to find a collection of scabs around my pubes. FML

#19542663
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14922) - you deserved it (13167)

On 04/28/2012 at 2:28pm - intimacy - by Matt (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I had to explain to a customer how our hotel charged his card even though he has never stayed with us. Apparently his wife is a regular customer. I can't help but feel like a home-wrecker. FML

#19541511
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31547) - you deserved it (1930)

On 04/28/2012 at 9:57am - misc - by Steve - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was with a friend at the mall and I made eye contact and smiled at the worker at a smoothie stand that I went on a date with last year. He saw me, and then ducked down behind the register, where he remained while his coworker awkwardly leaned over him to take my order and money. FML

#19540774
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21528) - you deserved it (2693)

On 04/28/2012 at 2:54am - misc - by ouch (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found out that my fellow marching band mates all refer to me as the "short girl with big tits" because none of them can remember my name. FML

#19536517
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23614) - you deserved it (3920)

On 04/27/2012 at 8:04am - misc - by noname (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, while I was at work in a machine shop, I cut myself really bad. Not by any sharp tools, drills, or metals I work with. Just the soap dispenser. FML

#19535825
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18200) - you deserved it (3805)

On 04/27/2012 at 1:49am - work - by Bullocks (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I brought several bags of soda cans to the store to cash in. I hadn't shaved, and my coat had fur all over from my cat rubbing on it. The lady in front of me turned around, looked at my bags and me and said, "It's a lot of money people throw away, isn't it?" Apparently, I look homeless. FML

#19534101
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9652) - you deserved it (18662)

On 04/26/2012 at 8:04pm - misc - by AndyAnonymous (man) - United States

Today, I walked into a public restroom to find that they had set up a free health clinic for the homeless; by that I mean that I found one bum inspecting and cleaning the infected, bloody genitals of another bum. FML

#19531341
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24312) - you deserved it (2436)

On 04/26/2012 at 8:08am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, I found out that I've been calling my boyfriend's dad by the wrong name for the past two years. No one had told me sooner because they liked laughing at me for it when I wasn't around. FML

#19530940
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21748) - you deserved it (3829)

On 04/26/2012 at 3:11am - misc - by somefamily (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I got a one-inch fish bone stuck in my throat. I went to the doctor, who claimed he couldn't see the long white thing embedded next to my tonsil. He charged me $70, and told me to eat some bread. I had to pull it out myself with a pair of tweezers. FML

#19484025
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28775) - you deserved it (1866)

On 04/17/2012 at 1:37pm - health - by Merlin - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I found out my 12 year old daughter is going through a bit of an "emotional" stage. I got a call from her school saying she was sitting in the corner at recess trying to cut her wrist. With a plastic spoon. FML

#19350596
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27655) - you deserved it (4896)

On 03/26/2012 at 10:54am - kids - by ohhdear.___. (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my husband started getting frisky, but I wasn't in the mood, so I said I'd just like to cuddle and talk. He decided a good topic of conversation was whether or not it would be physically possible to smoke my grandma's ashes from the cremation urn. FML

#19279309
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18772) - you deserved it (8542)

On 03/14/2012 at 9:32pm - misc - by solyana vr1 - United States

Today, I went to help a friend move into her new apartment. We were half-way through when it started to rain, and in my anger I yelled that it's like these things happen just to annoy me. Then we heard the tornado sirens. FML

#19203363
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21085) - you deserved it (3656)

On 03/02/2012 at 4:15pm - misc - by wtf did I do - United States

Today, I got a text from my mom saying, "I heard the cupcake store got robbed. Where are you?" Then she texted back, "Oh never mind, they wanted money, not cupcakes. It wasn't you." Very funny, Mom. FML

#19062994
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23523) - you deserved it (4469)

On 02/13/2012 at 2:09am - misc - by cieee - United States (Texas)

Today, I got denied a job. They told me I was unreliable because I didn't show up for my third interview. This is the same interview they called and cancelled this morning. FML

#19025988
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24537) - you deserved it (1660)

On 02/08/2012 at 11:53am - work - by abrooks88 - United States

Today, I got denied a job. They told me I was unreliable because I didn't show up for my third interview. This is the same interview they called and cancelled this morning. FML

#19025988
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24537) - you deserved it (1660)

On 02/08/2012 at 11:53am - work - by abrooks88 - United States



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