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oranjeguice

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oranjeguice

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 8 November 1992 (21 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2161
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About oranjeguice :

I ride unicycles.

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oranjeguice's favorite FMLs

Today, I was reading a book on paper for the first time in maybe a month. I had to stop at a word I did not recognise. Because I'm so used to using a Kindle, I tried to get the definition by pressing it. I had my finger on the word for a few seconds before I realised it was paper. FML

#19637178
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6836) - you deserved it (35216)

On 05/17/2012 at 2:57pm - misc - by Bilze - United States (Virginia)

Today, my first date consisted of him and me in the emergency room of the hospital after his little brother hit me in the face with a baseball bat. FML

#19635383
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22635) - you deserved it (1632)

On 05/17/2012 at 1:05am - misc - by secret_source (woman) - United States

Today, I was in the hospital with rib injuries after being rear-ended by a truck. The doc said, "Well, you'll probably feel like you've been hit by a truck for a while." Everyone laughed, except me. When I said he was being insensitive, he replied, "Calm down, I'm just ribbing you." FML

#19633356
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14880) - you deserved it (27558)

On 05/16/2012 at 6:29pm - health - by ...... (man) - United States

Today, I woke up after a long night of drinking with my friends. I vaguely remembered visiting a tattoo parlour, but nothing prepared me for the sight of the words "YOLO" and "MOFO" tattooed across the fingers of my left and right hands. Now I'm officially a bandwagoning douchebag. FML

#19633207
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8320) - you deserved it (34261)

On 05/16/2012 at 5:56pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I had to collect my daughter from the hospital. Her boyfriend was even more upset than she was, because his iPhone's screen was damaged beyond repair when the doctor pulled it out of my daughter's vagina. FML

#19631928
475 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47165) - you deserved it (4370)

On 05/16/2012 at 12:10pm - intimacy - by smart move there (woman) - Ireland (Kildare)

Today, not only did my boyfriend set my hair on fire, but he attempted to put it out by dumping bong water on my head. FML

#19631611
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22156) - you deserved it (9104)

On 05/16/2012 at 10:19am - love - by Coykoi - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, my boyfriend walked in on me as I was browsing a baby name website. I explained to him that I was naming characters for a novel I was planning to write, but he is completely convinced that I'm pregnant, and has even told his parents. FML

#19631017
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24199) - you deserved it (3400)

On 05/16/2012 at 4:20am - kids - by inapickle (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, whilst working in a pharmacy, I was given the pleasure of listening to an old lady share the details of what she sticks up her vagina. FML

#19626087
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25487) - you deserved it (2357)

On 05/15/2012 at 4:08am - intimacy - by uni life (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my boss at my new job asked whether I was fitting in OK. The company is Swedish, so as a joke, I said that at home I now serve all my food as a smorgasbord, chew on fermented herring and Daim chocolate bars, and buy all my furniture at Ikea. She didn't see the funny side. FML

#19625966
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5557) - you deserved it (29392)

On 05/15/2012 at 2:48am - work - by Isa (woman) - United States

Today, I walked in on my dad introducing his stuffed gorilla to his cat. FML

#19625273
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19297) - you deserved it (2465)

On 05/14/2012 at 11:52pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was having dinner with my college friends to celebrate the end of our first year. I said really great things about them as individuals. The only thing they had to say to me was, "Thanks for being the token black friend." FML

#19624704
24 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22627) - you deserved it (2694)

On 05/14/2012 at 10:23pm - misc - by foreverbrown (man) - United States

Today, I found out that a family member found a publisher for his book; his badly written, terribly sourced, historically inaccurate book that insults and misrepresents most world cultures and religions. If this actually makes it to print, I'll never be able to use my maiden name again. FML

#19620851
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20046) - you deserved it (1901)

On 05/14/2012 at 3:37am - misc - by AmatureLitCritic - United States (Oregon)

Today, my boyfriend got so happy when he thought he'd finally given me an orgasm. I was covering an urge to sneeze. FML

#19620507
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25315) - you deserved it (3645)

On 05/14/2012 at 1:27am - intimacy - by sneezeattack (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I realized that all the times I checked behind the shower curtain before peeing didn't prepare me for what to do if someone was actually there. FML

#19616275
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30238) - you deserved it (3556)

On 05/13/2012 at 11:12am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I found out that my girlfriend has been paying her half of the rent by taking my ATM card and getting money from my account. FML

#19615812
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24699) - you deserved it (4890)

On 05/13/2012 at 9:08am - money - by humbug - United States (Colorado)



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