oranjeguice

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oranjeguice

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 8 November 1992 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3696
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About oranjeguice :

I ride unicycles.

oranjeguice's page activity

Visits<b>mckenz1eq</b> - the 01/16/2016 at 11:55am<b>dying_to_know</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 5:21pm

Fucked!<b>mckenz1eq</b> - the 01/16/2016 at 5:55pm

oranjeguice's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

oranjeguice's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to the hospital for stomach pains, and was told that it sounds like I have an ovarian cyst. My mom went into a rage, screaming that I'd lied to her about being a virgin. Despite the doctor explaining that sexual activity has nothing to do with it, she refuses to believe him. FML

by Briscuit / 06/01/2012 at 5:05pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, a girl started talking to me at the bus stop. After it descended into an awkward silence, I jumped on my bus to avoid further conversation. She got on the same bus. And got off at the same stop. I swear the whole bus could feel the tension. FML

by Silent / 06/01/2012 at 10:24am / Singapore / Love

Today, I couldn't find my hairbrush anywhere; I ended up having to brush my hair with a fork. FML

by jemila / 05/31/2012 at 9:14pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, in a rush to get my clothes back on at my girlfriend's house at the sound of her parents opening the front door, I forgot to take the condom off. Her dad watched it fall out of my pant leg and onto the kitchen floor. FML

by Anonymous / 05/31/2012 at 4:53pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, my daughter was still acting out her teenage issues. This morning, when I told her to, "Have a nice day" she screamed at me, "DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO!" FML

by Aldoch / 05/30/2012 at 6:41pm / Kids

Today, I finally summed up the courage to break up with my abusively controlling girlfriend. I don't know what I was thinking, but instead of leaving as a free man, I left as an engaged one. FML

by Anonymous / 05/30/2012 at 6:35pm / Italy (Lombardia) / Love

Today, my girlfriend stuck her finger up my butt while giving me a hand-job, promising it would feel really good. It just felt awkward and made me need to poop. FML

by Brax / 05/30/2012 at 5:46am / United States / Intimacy

Today, at my job as a lifeguard, I told a teenager to, "Walk please." He then threw his soda at me as he ran away. We aren't allowed off stand unless it's an emergency, so I baked in that soda for 30 minutes. FML

by emonsteadman / 05/28/2012 at 10:05am / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, my car broke down and had to be towed to the dealership. Normally, this would be just unlucky but I work with kids and we had been fundraising for charity. I am now sitting at the dealership with my hair coloured purple, red and blue and in ridiculously high pigtails while people stare. FML

by straightlyconfused / 05/27/2012 at 9:20am / Australia (Queensland) / Work

Today, the mailman delivered my new phone to my neighbour's house. This was okay, because he left a note in my mailbox informing me so. Now my crazy neighbour won't give me the package because, "*I* signed for it!" FML

by Byebye / 05/24/2012 at 3:30pm / Netherlands (Groningen) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went into my classroom to find a bag of shit on my desk with a note saying, "Thanks for failing me b*tch!" FML

by Anonymous / 05/24/2012 at 12:59am / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, I was browsing the web on my boyfriend's laptop, when I idly clicked a bookmark. It turned out to be his private blog, where he most recently spoke in very creepy detail about his efforts to make me love him, remarking that, "Soon, I'll plant my seed in her breeding hips." FML

by Anonymous / 05/22/2012 at 4:49pm / Canada (Alberta) / Love

Today, I reached a new level of commitment in my relationship with my boyfriend. This happened when he pooped on the side of the road beside my truck, while talking and making eye contact with me while wiping. FML

by ordinaryday / 05/22/2012 at 8:21am / Canada (Alberta) / Love

Today, I reached a new level of commitment in my relationship with my boyfriend. This happened when he pooped on the side of the road beside my truck, while talking and making eye contact with me while wiping. FML

by ordinaryday / 05/22/2012 at 8:21am / Canada (Alberta) / Love

Today, I learned that shaving while feeling upset is a very bad idea. FML

by Anonymous / 05/22/2012 at 6:35am / Philippines / Health