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Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
Today, I came home to find a mouse in the garage. Frantic, I killed it. My 7-year-old son came home from soccer, and started crying because he couldn't find the class pet, Mr. Whiskers. I killed my son's class pet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21477) - you deserved it (13499)
On 12/07/2012 at 10:30am - animals - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I found out that the phone number I switched to, used to host an amateur phone sex hotline. I found this out after getting several calls by teenagers, who sounded as if they were masturbating even as I yelled that they had the wrong number. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17517) - you deserved it (1061)
On 06/26/2012 at 5:10pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I was so bored that I spent two hours researching the history of spoons. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15647) - you deserved it (5021)
On 03/17/2012 at 11:53am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)
Today, while watching Rio, I got a boner when Blu and Jewel kissed. This is almost as pathetic as getting a boner a few days ago while watching Homer and Marge kiss on The Simpsons. I think I'm way past the point of ever getting laid. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24897) - you deserved it (7345)
On 01/01/2012 at 1:09pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was at my girlfriend's house. We decided to have sex in her basement. All awesome, until her mom walked down and wanted to watch a movie with us. I had to watch it naked under a blanket. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11490) - you deserved it (4559)
On 01/04/2010 at 10:49am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, my manager sent me a text message with a picture of Santa masturbating, with a message that said he wished me a white Christmas. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15838) - you deserved it (3267)
On 11/22/2009 at 4:15am - intimacy - by lonewolf2701 - United States
Today, I visited home. My drunk mother was screaming to my drunk stepdad about a fight four years ago. My little sister was looking in the mirror practicing her "Orgasm face." And the neighbors were dancing outside coked out and naked. FML
I agree, your life sucks (61322) - you deserved it (3345)
On 09/19/2009 at 12:55am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I was having cybersex via webcam with my boyfriend. Trying to be as sexy as I could, I started sucking on my finger. Judging by the look on my boyfriend's face, he was getting really into it. As I started getting into it too, I shoved my finger too far down and puked all over my laptop. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19214) - you deserved it (94356)
On 04/27/2009 at 9:51am - intimacy - by BARF (woman) - United States (California)
Today, after sex with my girlfriend, I thought it would be sexy to wear her underwear until we saw each other again. I found a pair in her bathroom, but they definitely weren't her sexy ones. Her mom walked in on me to collect the laundry and screeched "What are you doing with my panties!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (11334) - you deserved it (75067)
On 03/20/2009 at 1:37am - intimacy - by HughGorgy (man) - Canada (British Columbia)
Monday 17 June 2013
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