About ollie179 : Hey there. You're most likely here because you:
1) Thought my profile picture of a pig was cute because you like bacon. Instead the pig is just a scam for me to lure you here and sell you timeshares. HAHA! Uhhh...ignore that...
2) You accidentally clicked on me instead of Perdix or DocBastard. Curse them both, they must get all the women...they must pay! Uhhh...ignore that...
3) You're a stalker. If you are a stalker I must warn you...I will find you, and I will kill you. Uhhh...ignore that...
4) You just wanna be friends! Yay! If that's the case come round my house at 1am and knock 5 times at the door. Then I'll tie you up and keep you in my basement and we'll be friends forever! Uhhh...ignore that...
5)If you don't apply to any of these things then obviously your not worth my time. Begone peasant!
If anyone does get brutally murdered then I'd just like to say that I've always thought Noor had a shifty eye...just saying...
Why am I up so early?
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Today, the woman I'm training at work asked, while staring intently at the keyboard, "now, which one of these buttons is the space-bar again?" She is 80 years old, types about 1 word per minute, and I have just one week to get her completely trained. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22163) - you deserved it (1773)
On 08/05/2011 at 10:42am - work - by jhftrainer23 - United States (Iowa)
Today, I had to endure a long story about how and why my brother shaves his pubes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23940) - you deserved it (3225)
On 07/17/2011 at 11:21am - intimacy - by Username - United States (California)
Today, I went to a Japanese restaurant, where the chefs cook the food right in front of you. Our chef tossed an egg in the air, but sadly didn't catch it. Don't worry though, my hair got it instead. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23393) - you deserved it (2277)
On 07/16/2011 at 1:24pm - misc - by KatrinaKitten - United States (New York)
Today, I got asked on a date. I was later told we had to cancel. Why? My ex is parked in front of his house and he is afraid to leave. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33418) - you deserved it (2580)
On 06/29/2011 at 4:41pm - love - by nolove4me (woman) - United States (Alaska)
Today, I was trying to listen to a phone message I'd received. I was excited because I'd been waiting for the coaches to call me back for tryouts for a week now. Trying to figure out how to listen to it, I ended up deleting it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11464) - you deserved it (17463)
On 05/14/2011 at 7:17pm - misc - by ihatelife (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, it's my three month anniversary with my girlfriend and so I decided to bake her a cake from scratch. It took me three hours, a call to my mom, three different recipe books, and half my pantry. On the way to her house, I stopped to pick up flowers and left the cake in the car. It melted. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30052) - you deserved it (7865)
On 05/07/2011 at 7:10pm - love - by sadman (man) - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, I discovered my wife has a YouTube channel dedicated to 20 second videos of her wearing a fake mustache and making weird sounds. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35897) - you deserved it (6283)
On 05/07/2011 at 9:56am - love - by wtfiswrongwithher - Australia (Queensland)
Monday 20 May 2013
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