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ollie179

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ollie179
  • Town/Country : Bridport, UK
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2335
  • Number of comments : 186
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 17 posted

About ollie179 : The pig is called George.
And my name is Ollie.

But you're here for George aren't you...

ollie179's last visitors

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You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

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Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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ollie179's favorite FMLs

Today, my upstairs neighbor was leaving the parking lot, and stopped to wave. I smiled and waved back, only to realize that she was saying goodbye to her cat, who was sitting in the window. FML

#17966931
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19470) - you deserved it (2991)

On 10/12/2011 at 11:41am - animals - by octoberrain - United States

Today, I learned that it takes about half an hour to get melted cheese out of your hair. FML

#17956536
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15425) - you deserved it (4813)

On 10/10/2011 at 11:34pm - health - by jzappe - United States (California)

Today, I was at my girlfriend's house. I really had to use the bathroom, but decided to wait. After about an hour, I went to the restroom. I pissed for so long that when I walked out her family all started clapping. FML

#17954920
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22026) - you deserved it (5365)

On 10/10/2011 at 8:58pm - health - by maniac11 - United States (Texas)

Today, I brought my boyfriend over to meet the family. After several long moments of silence, one of my sisters burst out laughing, and asked, "Okay, who is this guy really?" FML

#17954133
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24679) - you deserved it (2494)

On 10/10/2011 at 7:16pm - love - by octoberrain - United States (Ohio)

Today, during my first date with a girl I've liked for awhile, she tells me about some minor disabilities she was born with. Wanting to be honest with her too, I tell her I'm slightly autistic. Her response was, "I'm sorry this isn't going to work. I can't date a retard." I had to eat alone after that. FML

#17948133
351 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43459) - you deserved it (3159)

On 10/09/2011 at 11:27pm - love - by DyingPlants (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my Dad's banjo arrived, as part of his mid-life crisis. It would be fine if he could play it but unfortunately he's tone deaf. He hasn't stopped playing it for the last 4 hours. FML

#17927244
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18163) - you deserved it (1638)

On 10/07/2011 at 11:09am - misc - by anonymous - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, working as a life guard, I walked through the changing room to go back to the pool. On the way, a naked old man started up a conversation with me. We talked for 10 minutes about pool chemicals, while his penis wobbled around with every small movement. This happens all the time. FML

#17927200
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21697) - you deserved it (2805)

On 10/07/2011 at 10:58am - work - by Dr.Octopus454 (man) - United Kingdom (Warwickshire)

Today, my car got acquainted with about 3 dozen eggs. FML

#17924502
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20041) - you deserved it (2751)

On 10/06/2011 at 11:21pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I finally found the courage to tell my drug addict husband that I'm leaving him. He sat in his chair, denying using drugs, ever. Right after he said this, he passed out and spilled hot coffee on himself. He then denied spilling the coffee. As I was leaving, he took all of my shoes. FML

#17924214
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28172) - you deserved it (2752)

On 10/06/2011 at 10:53pm - love - by stacyyvonne - United States (Florida)

Today, I was asked if my bellybutton was an 'innie' or an 'outtie.' My bellybutton has been hidden by fat for so long that I couldn't remember. FML

#17922863
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9578) - you deserved it (34764)

On 10/06/2011 at 8:40pm - misc - by knzknz - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was suspended from work. Some lady went to the manager and told them that I was stalking her, all because I would kindly greet her everyday at the grocery store. I'm the cashier. FML

#17921774
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22292) - you deserved it (1641)

On 10/06/2011 at 6:28pm - work - by hazlanz216 - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I learned that my mother might not live much longer. My boyfriend, instead of showing compassion asked me, "We're still having video chat sex, right?" FML

#17914334
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34843) - you deserved it (3751)

On 10/05/2011 at 8:55pm - intimacy - by Forever sad (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, I bought my girlfriend a very expensive necklace. I gave it to her thinking she'd be extremely happy. Instead she was mad at me because my gift for our anniversary was better than hers. FML

#17906392
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26676) - you deserved it (2507)

On 10/04/2011 at 8:14pm - love - by Nickolas Neffster - United States (Tennessee)

Today, on my way home, my girlfriend started sexting me, telling me that she was waiting at my house. In my rush to get home to see her, I got pulled over and had to be patted down. He found no weapons, but he did find my stiffy. FML

#17906295
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30436) - you deserved it (8391)

On 10/04/2011 at 8:02pm - intimacy - by Username - United States

Today, my younger cousin bought his girlfriend of 3 months a bunch of flowers. The only flower I've ever got from my boyfriend of 3 years is a plastic one he found on the floor in a bar. FML

#17904987
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20912) - you deserved it (3700)

On 10/04/2011 at 5:08pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom



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