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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 580
  • Number of comments : 45
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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olive47's page activity

Visits<b>AnnaDeWitt</b> - the 08/22/2015 at 11:09am<b>TheSovietOnion</b> - the 04/11/2015 at 5:14pm<b>NeyNeyDaDa</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 4:28pm<b>marinegrant</b> - the 03/14/2015 at 12:03pm<b>shanekicksass</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 3:19am<b>LeashaJoy5595</b> - the 02/01/2015 at 10:24pm<b>redneck_wolf</b> - the 01/17/2015 at 1:08pm<b>Kitty19</b> - the 01/06/2015 at 10:04am<b>derp_taco</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 10:06am<b>AetherFox42</b> - the 05/13/2014 at 12:37am<b>wopchop12</b> - the 03/29/2014 at 2:47pm<b>hihello18</b> - the 03/15/2014 at 8:40am<b>tigerfish</b> - the 11/19/2013 at 10:50am<b>forshey13</b> - the 11/10/2013 at 11:39pm<b>tim1999</b> - the 10/26/2013 at 5:47pm<b>hunteryager</b> - the 09/06/2013 at 10:02am<b>Hellishness</b> - the 06/22/2013 at 1:41pm<b>Dany93</b> - the 01/30/2013 at 10:12pm

olive47's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

olive47's favorite FMLs

Today, on the bus, a delusional old man had an extremely long conversation with me, referring to me as "Leslie" and talking about "our childhood together". Not wanting to hurt his feelings I played along. At his stop he got up and grinned at me, saying "I'm kidding. I never knew a Leslie in my life. Nice rack." FML

by Anonymous / 06/26/2011 at 2:12am / United States (Indiana) / Transportation

Today, as I passed my fiancé the pancakes I had just made, he vocalised his happiness with a groan that was EXACTLY like the one he makes when we have sex. So on a sexiness rating, I'm a pancake. FML

by Eve / 06/24/2011 at 6:45am / Ireland (Cork) / Intimacy

Today, I found out my boyfriend uses me for two things. 1) My food. 2) My sister. FML

by Maddie / 06/20/2011 at 4:05pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love

Today, I had to lie to my female roommate about what happened last night. She was drunk and spent half the night cuddling with me and trying to get me to kiss her. I've loved this girl for two years, but I promised her I wouldn't let her cheat on her boyfriend with anyone. Even me. FML

by anonymous / 06/15/2011 at 2:00pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Love

Today, I watched my boss try to stick a magnet to cardboard. FML

by MegaBear / 06/15/2011 at 1:46am / United States / Work

Today, I walked in on my mom trying to wax her butt. FML

by blahblah493 / 05/26/2011 at 12:15am / United States / Intimacy

Today, we had a tornado warning and I told my parents I loved them, just in case. My dad just said "see you in Kansas". FML

by anonymous / 04/10/2011 at 11:26pm / Miscellaneous

Today, I was cooking, and I took a pot of boiling water to the sink to drain. My pot holder slipped, and the boiling water spilled all over my breasts. Second degree boob burns are bad, but losing half a nipple to potato salad is worse. FML

by ouchmytits / 03/28/2011 at 2:42am / United States (Mississippi) / Health


by Anonymous / 03/21/2011 at 1:32pm / United Kingdom (Wiltshire) / Geek

Today, I received a text message from my wife who had gone out for the evening with some girlfriends: "Have to take a friend home, she's drunk! I'll be staying at his place. Call you tomorrow morning." His? FML

by Anonymous / 01/30/2011 at 1:21am / Love

Today, I received a call from child care. Apparently, my four year-old boy tried to start a mosh pit during naptime. FML

by lerouxmaster / 12/22/2010 at 6:43am / Kids

Today, my Platoon Sergeant caught me unshaved, so now I have to write a 1000 word essay on "The importance of shaving." FML

by jacko / 08/15/2010 at 5:47am / Reserved / Work

Today, I was texting my crush. I tried to say, "I need a nap," but my iPhone changed it to "I need anal." I sent it. FML

by Allie / 06/03/2010 at 2:58pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, while making out with my boyfriend, he started playing with my nipples. Suddenly he stops kissing me, looks at my nipples and says, "Have they always been like this? They look like joysticks!". He then started singing the Super Mario Brother's theme song and playing the game with my nipples. FML

by Anonymous / 03/14/2010 at 10:09pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my husband is completely convinced that his taking a massive dump after being constipated is exactly like the time I gave birth to our twins. FML

by Anonymous / 01/08/2010 at 11:32am / United States (New York) / Love