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ohheyyitsnaomi

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ohheyyitsnaomi

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 30 May 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 886
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About ohheyyitsnaomi : www.ohheyyitsnaomi.tumblr.com

ohheyyitsnaomi's page activity

Visits<b>CTPope74</b> - the 01/02/2014 at 10:03am<b>broken_symlink</b> - the 07/25/2012 at 10:19am<b>MrBrightside21</b> - the 07/14/2012 at 6:58pm

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ohheyyitsnaomi's favorite FMLs

Today, while the kid I was babysitting was in the bathroom, he called to me "I need some help in here." Worried I ran to the bathroom and asked him what was wrong. He needed me to wipe his butt. As if that weren't gross enough, just as my hand was under his butt, he pooped again and laughed. FML

#2421163
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58514) - you deserved it (5747)

On 05/30/2009 at 12:24am - kids - by sdasdflkjas (woman) - United States

Today, while the kid I was babysitting was in the bathroom, he called to me "I need some help in here." Worried I ran to the bathroom and asked him what was wrong. He needed me to wipe his butt. As if that weren't gross enough, just as my hand was under his butt, he pooped again and laughed. FML

#2421163
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58514) - you deserved it (5747)

On 05/30/2009 at 12:24am - kids - by sdasdflkjas (woman) - United States

Today, while the kid I was babysitting was in the bathroom, he called to me "I need some help in here." Worried I ran to the bathroom and asked him what was wrong. He needed me to wipe his butt. As if that weren't gross enough, just as my hand was under his butt, he pooped again and laughed. FML

#2421163
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58514) - you deserved it (5747)

On 05/30/2009 at 12:24am - kids - by sdasdflkjas (woman) - United States

Today, I bit into a Reese's Cup that had been sitting on my desk for a while. As I did, half of a yellow meal worm fell out and landed in front of me, the other half was in my mouth. It was wiggling. FML

#1845707
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54374) - you deserved it (27565)

On 05/11/2009 at 3:45pm - misc - by Wormy - United States (Ohio)

Today, an ant bit my penis. That was the first 'mouth' to ever touch it. FML

#1382761
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (89325) - you deserved it (21502)

On 04/27/2009 at 2:14am - misc - by hjgjh - United States (California)

Today, my friend drove me me to catch the 8 pm train. Running late, we screeched into the parking lot at 7:57, stopped the car in a 'no stop' zone. I said goodbye to my friend, sprinted to my train and barely made it. Then, with the train in motion, I noticed my friend's car keys in my hand. FML

Today, it was easter and I thought it might be fun to look for eggs with my little brother. My parents told me to take the ones in the higher places that my brother couldn't reach. All of his eggs were filled with candy or money. Each one of mine had a note saying 'maybe when you lose weight'. FML

#925174
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67550) - you deserved it (8681)

On 04/12/2009 at 11:22am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend got the breast implants she's been wanting for the last 5 years. When I went to pick her up at the hospital she said, "Maybe I can find a guy with a real job now!" I paid for her fake tits. FML

#913985
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61597) - you deserved it (19418)

On 04/11/2009 at 11:47am - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my girlfriend got the breast implants she's been wanting for the last 5 years. When I went to pick her up at the hospital she said, "Maybe I can find a guy with a real job now!" I paid for her fake tits. FML

#913985
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61597) - you deserved it (19418)

On 04/11/2009 at 11:47am - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my tampon string was hanging from my bathing suit. My boyfriend thought it was a thread hanging from my bikini bottom. He publicly pulled out my tampon. FML

#784043
455 comments

I agree, your life sucks (406339) - you deserved it (66815)

On 04/03/2009 at 3:39pm - misc - by rebekah (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my boyfriend and I were at his house having sex. After about 30 minutes, his mom came home and was knocking on the door asking "What are you doing?" Thinking I might have a chance to sneak out, I got dressed real quiet. Then my boyfriend answers, "Zoe. I'm doing Zoe." FML

#459925
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (82011) - you deserved it (15008)

On 03/19/2009 at 2:05am - intimacy - by Zoe123 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out that the electric nose hair clippers that I've been using for the past two years are in fact my father's pubic hair trimmers. FML

#268093
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58868) - you deserved it (15043)

On 03/11/2009 at 2:07am - misc - by nickyniknaim93 (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, the cute boy in my biology class I had been crushing on invited me over to study for a huge test. Once I got to his house, I really had to use the bathroom. I ended ending up taking a huge dump and clogging up his toilet. He had to come plunge it for me. FML

#261901
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70183) - you deserved it (21848)

On 03/10/2009 at 4:42pm - love - by musicaddict (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was sitting in traffic for about an hour. I've heard stories about people doing the dirty in their cars and I never do anything risky so I thought, why not, I'll be here a while, no one can see me: I'll masturbate. Midway through I hear a tap on my driver's window. Its a police officer. FML

#192974
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27977) - you deserved it (138131)

On 03/03/2009 at 1:29am - intimacy - by imanidiot (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I celebrated my birthday with my friend who has the same birthday by going out to dinner with a bunch of our friends. The waiter brought out a cake for my friend but not for me. No one noticed my exclusion. I sang happy birthday on my birthday. FML

#109688
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53509) - you deserved it (3291)

On 02/22/2009 at 11:05pm - misc - by jet8725 - United States (Virginia)



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