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ohheyyitsnaomi

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ohheyyitsnaomi

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 30 May 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 992
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About ohheyyitsnaomi : www.ohheyyitsnaomi.tumblr.com

ohheyyitsnaomi's page activity

Visits<b>CTPope74</b> - the 01/02/2014 at 10:03am<b>MrBrightside21</b> - the 07/14/2012 at 6:58pm

ohheyyitsnaomi's FML badges

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

ohheyyitsnaomi's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend texted one of her male friends, saying she's turned off by the thought of sex with me. She suggested a bit of "exercise sex" with him. I'm sure he would have eagerly agreed, if he'd been the one receiving the texts. FML

#20104673
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34496) - you deserved it (2334)

On 10/06/2012 at 7:04pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend told me he masturbates to the thought of me swimming in pancake syrup. FML

#20094500
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30169) - you deserved it (5179)

On 09/30/2012 at 12:37am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my 2-year-old told me he found a new finger puppet. It was a used condom. FML

#20080363
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18130) - you deserved it (26594)

On 09/20/2012 at 3:00am - intimacy - by myself - United States (California)

Today, I found out I'm pregnant. Yesterday, I finally came to my senses and started using birth control. FML

#20074444
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8013) - you deserved it (52968)

On 09/16/2012 at 11:32am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I had a date with a guy from the Internet. I'm 6ft1, which tends to put potential dates off, so I'd slyly knocked a few inches off my description. Turns out he'd done the same. He'd added a whole foot to his height. I had to crouch to talk to him. FML

#20071299
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19602) - you deserved it (12431)

On 09/14/2012 at 4:26am - love - by TallGal (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, while getting pretty intimate with my newlywed wife in the car, a cop turned his lights on. As he was walking up, I was trying to get my pants back on but they wouldn't fit over my knees. The cop just laughed and walked away. Turns out my wife had my pants on and I was trying to put hers on. FML

#20048187
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28938) - you deserved it (6888)

On 08/29/2012 at 5:37pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I turned on the TV just in time to see my picture on the news. I have no idea what they said about me. FML

#20043967
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29422) - you deserved it (2476)

On 08/27/2012 at 2:45am - misc - by masterman - Canada (Alberta)

Today, the office I work at put up a "No Masturbating at Desks" sign. I'm disappointed by this, not because I usually whack off at my desk, but because enough people do that there needs to be a sign against it. FML

#20043181
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28013) - you deserved it (3749)

On 08/26/2012 at 7:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me by picture, during a game of Draw Something. FML

#20042043
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29138) - you deserved it (1997)

On 08/26/2012 at 1:03am - love - by wtf - New Zealand (Southland)

Today, my dog was diagnosed with depression. I got him to help with my depression. I guess we can just be miserable together. FML

#20039193
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27442) - you deserved it (2529)

On 08/24/2012 at 11:45am - animals - by alix - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)

Today, I had a chat with my husband, and I convinced him to try being more spontaneous to spice up our sex life. This evening, he burst into our bedroom with an eyepatch on, and "seductively" growled, "I'm gonna slay your pussy, wench." FML

#20015589
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14808) - you deserved it (38482)

On 08/11/2012 at 6:22pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my mother bitched me out for not finishing my laundry. I'm a 37-year-old mother of three. She rents my basement suite. FML

Today, my mother bitched me out for not finishing my laundry. I'm a 37-year-old mother of three. She rents my basement suite. FML

Today, I went to buy some beer using my fake ID, when the cute cashier and I started flirting. When he asked me how old I was, I said without thinking, "Nineteen." FML

#19979933
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6298) - you deserved it (53873)

On 07/23/2012 at 4:45pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)



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