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ohaiicourtney

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ohaiicourtney

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 156
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About ohaiicourtney : Im a jerk

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Visits<b>SierraaaNicoleee</b> - the 03/22/2013 at 8:02pm<b>Coop817</b> - the 01/31/2013 at 12:21am<b>mountainmanneil</b> - the 01/26/2013 at 10:53am

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ohaiicourtney's favorite FMLs

Today, after teaching my 4 year old son about the concept of "Stranger Danger," we had gone to a park full of people. When I walked up to him to tell him we had to leave, he ran, screaming "Stranger! Don't touch me!" FML

#16028300
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34296) - you deserved it (7219)

On 05/03/2011 at 1:01am - kids - by armywife980 -

Today, my house was robbed while I sat helplessly on the toilet with violent diarrhoea. I could hear them laughing hysterically. FML

#15922476
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49133) - you deserved it (5781)

On 04/25/2011 at 5:39pm - misc - by Mike -

Today, I got my wisdom teeth pulled. My usually detached and unromantic boyfriend rushed right over after work with flowers and movies. A little while later, he admitted excitedly that he'd heard the numbing medication also works on gag reflexes and wanted to test the theory. FML

#15741479
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44184) - you deserved it (6371)

On 04/11/2011 at 3:27pm - intimacy - by Numb (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend was buying a new hockey stick; to test it out he started hitting a ball around the aisle and decided to shoot it back into its bin. Instead the ball hit me dead in the mouth, giving me a fat lip. Instead of consoling me, my boyfriend yelled "GOAL!" FML

#15408372
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31451) - you deserved it (6139)

On 03/20/2011 at 11:34pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was late for the bus. I chased after it for 3 blocks until I realized that the bus driver was laughing at me trying to catch her. FML

#15393060
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28827) - you deserved it (7953)

On 03/20/2011 at 1:08am - work - by Matt - United States (Michigan)

Today, after my 22 year old son realized that there was no more contact solution, he decided to use tequila because he thought it would "kill the germs." We had to go to the hospital to have his eyes flushed out. I raised this moron. FML

#15339337
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41711) - you deserved it (11201)

On 03/16/2011 at 6:05pm - kids - by WTF -

Today, I banged into a glass door. My friend laughed at me, so I turned around and gave him the finger, then turned back to continue walking and banged into the door again. FML

#15319937
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14276) - you deserved it (51168)

On 03/15/2011 at 8:37am - misc - by sylverster - Singapore

Today, in an attempt to impress a girl I like, I tried to crush a soda can by hitting it with my forehead. Not only did I fail, I knocked myself out in the process. When I regained consciousness, the girl was gone and someone had taken the liberty of drawing a penis on my face. FML

#15296176
263 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12563) - you deserved it (67196)

On 03/13/2011 at 6:26pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, while driving home I saw a few deer running beside me. I stopped to let them go in front. Instead, one face-plants, ramming into the side of my brand new car. FML

#15266728
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24793) - you deserved it (4236)

On 03/10/2011 at 8:44pm - misc - by JulieClaire -

Today, my dad bought a one hundred dollar collectible light-saber. He plays with it. In the front yard. With sound effects. FML

#15243539
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32331) - you deserved it (7008)

On 03/08/2011 at 8:15pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I took a busy train into the city. I was lucky enough to get a seat. People were forced to stand in the aisle in front of me, and the person directly opposite me, whose butt was level with my head farted in my face. Twice. FML

#15112625
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30399) - you deserved it (3990)

On 02/25/2011 at 8:25am - misc - by WhatsThatSmell (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I had to take an emergency contraceptive. I was talking to my boyfriend about it, and I told him that my stomach really hurt. His response? "Aw. That's just the baby dying." FML

#15109555
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45038) - you deserved it (18947)

On 02/25/2011 at 12:12am - intimacy - by greenchan (woman) - United States (Vermont)

Today, I took a picture of myself and put it on Facebook. After I did so, I realized that in the background, you can see my crush's Facebook page up on my laptop. He tagged himself. FML

#15105515
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16027) - you deserved it (45861)

On 02/24/2011 at 7:37pm - misc - by verasam01 (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I went to my son's high school play. The moment I arrived at the auditorium, I shouted out his name to let him know I made it. Thinking I was a student, a teacher yelled, "SHUT UP AND SIT DOWN!" Scared out of my mind, I quickly obeyed, to mass giggling from the kids. FML

#15098216
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13175) - you deserved it (31224)

On 02/24/2011 at 1:39am - kids - by Annie (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I threw up in the car. While driving. The good news though, I had a bag to catch it all. Bad news? The bag had a giant hole in the bottom. FML

#15084705
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25982) - you deserved it (3370)

On 02/22/2011 at 10:55pm - health - by CarSick (woman) - United States



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