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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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oh_really

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oh_really
  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1733
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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oh_really's favorite FMLs

Today, in the midst of foreplay, this girl tells me I am so hot, I respond "Ditto." She heatedly responds "I love ditto," to which I suavely reply "I didn't know you were into Pokemon. That may make you even sexier." She knows nothing about Pokemon, but I sure know how to kill the mood. FML

#3971030 (321)

I agree, your life sucks (12878) - you deserved it (53048)

On 07/23/2009 at 2:42am - intimacy - by MitchFail (man) - United States

Today, I was at walmart when my stomach began to hurt. I quickly waddled to the restroom in pain. As soon as I got in the stall, a huge crap exploded out of me. The child in the stall next to me started crying. When her mom asked what was wrong she said that I'd "killed her nose". FML

#3361418 (151)

I agree, your life sucks (46074) - you deserved it (6572)

On 06/30/2009 at 7:53am - health - by poopshooter101 (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was sitting at my college campus, there were good looking girls all around me and I was trying to catch their eye and smile, letting them know I'm available. A butterfly flew by me and I screamed. FML

#2123826 (185)

I agree, your life sucks (13113) - you deserved it (42971)

On 05/20/2009 at 8:11pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, a little girl at my work had an accident. She asked me to help her change, and as she was changing she stuck her hand in her vagina to make sure all the "peepee was gone". She then put that same hand on my face to balance herself as she finished changing. FML

#1949482 (193)

I agree, your life sucks (47266) - you deserved it (2244)

On 05/14/2009 at 10:39pm - kids - by thisreallyhappened (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, while teaching English in Korea, my boss gave me a birthday present from her and all of my co-workers. It was a really fancy box. It had very nice wrapping. It had a pretty bow. It was kind of heavy. It was 6 bottles of dandruff shampoo. FML

#1892907 (94)

I agree, your life sucks (35814) - you deserved it (5617)

On 05/13/2009 at 12:39am - work - by eslteacher (man) - Korea Republic of (Seoul-t'ukpyolsi)

Today, I saw a couple of beetles doing it. Jealous, I quickly crushed them with my boot while screaming, "IF I CAN'T DO IT, NOBODY WILL!" All the little kids playing on the local playground, including parents supervising them, gave me dirty, confused looks. FML

#1683543 (544)

I agree, your life sucks (15214) - you deserved it (82664)

On 05/06/2009 at 2:15am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was on the subway and saw this cute guy eyeing me. I crossed my legs, tossed back my hair, and raised my eyebrows slightly. As he came up to me, my heart started racing until he finally started flirting... with the girl next to me. FML

#1449850 (62)

I agree, your life sucks (40561) - you deserved it (7770)

On 04/29/2009 at 6:12am - love - by fmylifebad (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, as I was taking an evening jog around my neighbourhood, I passed an elderly woman. I grinned at her as sign of friendliness to a common pedestrian. She grinned back. Whilst staring at my crotch. FML

#1449103 (102)

I agree, your life sucks (36742) - you deserved it (4201)

On 04/29/2009 at 4:06am - health - by Jake (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was in a shopping center when I went to the toilet. I came out, washed my hands and suddenly got a massive itch in my crotch. Without thinking I itched it. I then had to walk around the center with a wet hand print on my crotch. FML

#1384927 (86)

I agree, your life sucks (7706) - you deserved it (36937)

On 04/27/2009 at 5:14am - misc - by maddie94 (woman) - Australia (South Australia)

Today, I was pulled over by a police officer for speeding. After writing the ticket, he asked me why I was wearing a surgical mask. I told him that swine flu was found in our area and I was scared. He thought that I was insulting him and wrote me another ticket. FML

#1383069 (220)

I agree, your life sucks (59110) - you deserved it (10557)

On 04/27/2009 at 2:24am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I repaired a boiler for a wealthy guy in a big house. While there, I fixed a leaking tap for free. When I went to go, the man slipped something into my shirt pocket and said "have a drink on me." When I got to my truck, I discovered that he'd given me a tea bag. FML

#598491 (161)

I agree, your life sucks (61856) - you deserved it (3900)

On 03/25/2009 at 12:33pm - misc - by toast - United Kingdom (Worcestershire)