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oathkeeper99

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oathkeeper99

3Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 17 February 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3743
  • Number of comments : 59
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

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oathkeeper99's page activity

Visits<b>the_rude_dude</b> - 17 hours ago<b>powerkeep</b> - the 12/18/2014 at 11:00am<b>Sandipboka</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 12:38pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 10:36pm<b>totallylosing</b> - the 12/08/2014 at 12:55pm<b>Cautocracy</b> - the 12/07/2014 at 3:30pm<b>Vanillanougat</b> - the 12/04/2014 at 6:13pm<b>DarksideDoll</b> - the 12/04/2014 at 1:27am<b>S232Flash</b> - the 12/03/2014 at 9:02pm<b>The_Shrimp52</b> - the 12/03/2014 at 3:58am<b>TJJOE</b> - the 12/03/2014 at 2:50am<b>pantherfan0877</b> - the 12/02/2014 at 9:58pm<b>brndnmcmillan</b> - the 12/02/2014 at 9:49pm<b>Tendou</b> - the 11/29/2014 at 2:38am<b>tchatfield9413</b> - the 11/27/2014 at 9:13am<b>whatsittoyabitch</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 5:17pm<b>Lct1196</b> - the 11/18/2014 at 4:36pm<b>HopelesslyCiara5</b> - the 11/17/2014 at 9:48pm

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oathkeeper99's favorite FMLs

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, he farted. He blamed it on a "nearby frog." FML

#18320267
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30234) - you deserved it (5256)

On 11/22/2011 at 8:00pm - intimacy - by Gabriela -

Today, I discovered that my dog is an aspiring underwear designer, her latest project being creating crotchless underwear. Mine seem to have been used as prototypes. FML

#18200720
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25024) - you deserved it (3571)

On 11/09/2011 at 9:48am - animals - by blacktyaffair - United States (Texas)

Today, I got shot at. Not by police, but by a hunter. While at work. Driving a garbage truck. How the hell a hunter mistook an orange-clad garbageman in a truck for a deer is beyond me. FML

#18188542
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30630) - you deserved it (2524)

On 11/07/2011 at 10:17pm - work - by lprocter1982 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, after a year and a half, I finally admitted to myself that I'm in an abusive relationship. Not with a person though, with my cat. FML

#18145611
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24426) - you deserved it (9358)

On 11/03/2011 at 6:56am - animals - by Nicole557 (woman) - United States

Today, I was called ugly and viciously ridiculed by a couple of teenage girls. They were wearing uggs and vests that made them look like a freak-show of bleached pomeranians. FML

#18111338
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29194) - you deserved it (2785)

On 10/30/2011 at 12:57pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was struggling to cycle up a steep hill. A guy heading past me on a scooter said I'd lost something. I stopped and looked back. Seeing nothing, I asked him what I lost. He replied, "Your momentum!" FML

#17985302
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30564) - you deserved it (5189) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 10/14/2011 at 9:53pm - misc - by adieuvelib - France

Today, I was struggling to cycle up a steep hill. A guy heading past me on a scooter said I'd lost something. I stopped and looked back. Seeing nothing, I asked him what I lost. He replied, "Your momentum!" FML

#17985302
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30564) - you deserved it (5189) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 10/14/2011 at 9:53pm - misc - by adieuvelib - France

Today, I was struggling to cycle up a steep hill. A guy heading past me on a scooter said I'd lost something. I stopped and looked back. Seeing nothing, I asked him what I lost. He replied, "Your momentum!" FML

#17985302
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30564) - you deserved it (5189) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 10/14/2011 at 9:53pm - misc - by adieuvelib - France

Today, I was playing video games at 2am. My guinea pig started squealing at me, and wouldn't stop until I turned out the lights and got into bed. I'm 20 years old, and I've let a rodent dictate my bedtime. FML

#17911621
301 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25344) - you deserved it (19969)

On 10/05/2011 at 2:58pm - animals - by Beeisc00l - Reserved

Today, at work, my boss went to the single-stall bathroom on our floor. The next thing I know, I'm on suspension pending review because some asshole left an upper-decker in the toilet. Since I'm the office prankster, all suspicion is now on me. I've been framed by my own colleagues. FML

#17888360
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18131) - you deserved it (12844)

On 10/02/2011 at 4:35pm - work - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)

Today, the shy girl in my class decided to bring a cake to share with everyone, since it was her birthday. Excited about the cake, I got everybody to sing "happy birthday" for her, only to realize too late that nobody in the class know her name, myself included. FML

#17801637
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11619) - you deserved it (39575)

On 09/22/2011 at 12:44am - misc - by mortenp - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was eating some popcorn with a guy, and I noticed a piece of hair coming out my mouth. I pulled it... and pulled it... and eventually some popcorn pieces came out attached to the end of the hair. I was so embarrassed, he tried to make me feel better by saying it looked like a magic trick. FML

#17708928
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28759) - you deserved it (3787)

On 09/10/2011 at 1:57am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I caught my husband farting on my wind-chime in an attempt to make it ring. It did. FML

#17668852
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29062) - you deserved it (4346)

On 09/05/2011 at 8:05am - misc - by Anonymous - Reserved

Today, I walked into my shed to find my daughter's boyfriend asleep and completely duct-taped to the ceiling, with his face painted like a clown. FML

#17628781
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31915) - you deserved it (3056)

On 08/31/2011 at 10:00am - kids - by piece of shed - United States (New York)

Today, my mum gave me half-raw chicken for dinner. After she refused to cook it again, I threw it away saying that I didn't want to get salmonella. She told to be more grateful, and that I was an idiot for trying to use salmonella as an excuse because 'it's chicken, not salmon'. FML

#17610443
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37011) - you deserved it (3373)

On 08/29/2011 at 4:33am - health - by SoupCanoe - United Kingdom (Hampshire)



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