About nyrangers1022 : Hey my name is andy. i see a get alot of profile views, bunch of creepers, lol....nah u can message me, ill respond. or jus IM me on AIM at nymetsfan1022
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Today, I had to pick my parents up from jail. They thought it would be okay to have sex behind a bush. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40050) - you deserved it (3366)
On 06/20/2011 at 11:57am - intimacy - by Username - United States (Texas)
Today, while a very cute girl was explaining the apartment's laundry machines to me, I blurted out, "It's okay, my pants are used to handling huge loads". FML
I agree, your life sucks (12226) - you deserved it (26055)
On 06/20/2011 at 3:37am - misc - by NewTenant (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, my husband bought me a bouquet of roses. They caused me to sneeze seven times in a row. That was the closest he's ever got me to an orgasm. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30156) - you deserved it (6160)
On 06/20/2011 at 1:45am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)
Today, I purchased an app to track my period. When my mother asked me why I got it, I told her I was going to use it so I knew when to not go on a date because I don't want to be uncomfortable during a long movie. She slapped me in the face and called me a dirty prostitute and a liar. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37640) - you deserved it (6584)
On 06/19/2011 at 9:46pm - intimacy - by stillAvirgin:( - United States (Arkansas)
Today, my back hurt really badly, so I decided to stay in bed. After a while, I sat up to shut the door. When I leaned over to reach it, I fell off my bed and face-planted the floor. After picking myself up and getting comfortable in my bed again, I realized the door was still open. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21417) - you deserved it (7714)
On 06/19/2011 at 2:46pm - health - by no one - United States (Mississippi)
Today, my back hurt really badly, so I decided to stay in bed. After a while, I sat up to shut the door. When I leaned over to reach it, I fell off my bed and face-planted the floor. After picking myself up and getting comfortable in my bed again, I realized the door was still open. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21417) - you deserved it (7714)
On 06/19/2011 at 2:46pm - health - by no one - United States (Mississippi)
Today, I told my five year old daughter that no, she could not have ice cream for breakfast. She retaliated by pooping in the living room and smearing it on the walls. My in-laws, whom I've been trying to impress for ages, are visiting today. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27568) - you deserved it (5192)
On 06/19/2011 at 2:03pm - kids - by screwedwoman27 - United States
Today, at the DMV, I was told to push my forehead against a vision testing device on the counter to activate a blinking light. When nothing happened, the employee started yelling for me to push harder. I tried again, only to knock the whole thing into her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21087) - you deserved it (2136)
On 06/19/2011 at 1:51pm - misc - by sabadaba - United States (Arizona)
Today, I saw myself on the news. I was one of the random passers by they had filmed for their story on the "Fat Epidemic." FML
I agree, your life sucks (32438) - you deserved it (17749)
On 06/19/2011 at 5:51am - health - by Username - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, after a long and tiring day at work, I went to the movies, loaded up on soda, popcorn, and candy. I ended up falling asleep and being woken up two hours later by an usher. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18227) - you deserved it (5777)
On 06/18/2011 at 5:49pm - misc - by Stormy - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I realized that my boyfriend will only have sex with me if I am on my stomach and not revealing my face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34977) - you deserved it (4785)
On 06/13/2011 at 1:05pm - intimacy - by sheyshey0413 - United States (Florida)
Today, I discovered a tick on my penis. After a long battle, he finally let go. Four hours later I'm in the hospital. My penis is twice the normal size. I may have won the battle but lost the war. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40876) - you deserved it (4218)
On 06/13/2011 at 2:25am - intimacy - by John jacob - United States (Georgia)
Today, my boyfriend and I pulled over to have sex in his mother's car. It was going great until I leaned back onto the horn, waking up our whole neighborhood. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8311) - you deserved it (35437)
On 06/12/2011 at 10:50pm - intimacy - by Shelly - United States (Indiana)
Today, I found out all about my son's secret online double life. He's been moonlighting for two years as a male prostitute by the name of Peter Parker. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33293) - you deserved it (3819)
On 06/11/2011 at 1:25pm - intimacy - by Mom (woman) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I dreamed that I was making out with a cute girl. Just as I was about to take it to the next level, she suddenly burst into tears and said, "I'm sorry, I can't do this." I can't even get laid in my dreams. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48232) - you deserved it (6283)
On 06/11/2011 at 10:24am - intimacy - by Ryan - United States (Wisconsin)
Friday 24 May 2013
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