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nkom

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nkom's favorite FMLs

Today, I was drawing while on the train, when a very good-looking woman looked at my work and said, "Wow, she's pretty. Is it supposed to be me?" She said it in a flirty tone, but before I could stop myself, I'd said "nah, it's just a generic face". FML

#20022605
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19425) - you deserved it (9352)

On 08/15/2012 at 1:41pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was on the bus when I felt a big yawn coming on, one so big that my mouth stretched and my eyes closed. It was at this point that the strange man beside me decided to lean over at lightning speed and put his tongue in my mouth. Technically it was my first kiss. I'm 21 years old. FML

#20014909
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41785) - you deserved it (4795)

On 08/11/2012 at 6:33am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, after my boyfriend and I had gotten frisky last night, I found a note on the front door of my building that read, "Dear girl in apartment 3D, from now on please close the blinds all the way or lose 30 pounds. Either would be acceptable." FML

#20012782
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29795) - you deserved it (16412)

On 08/10/2012 at 1:29am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Europe

Today, I was pooping at a local Target when I heard someone say "You need to eat more solids, you're pooping like a rabbit." FML

#20001897
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21296) - you deserved it (3673)

On 08/04/2012 at 7:35am - misc - by llaurenmariee - United States

Today, after being annoyed one too many times by my students' whiney attitudes, I accidentally blurted out, "Quit being such a bitch," to the superintendent's daughter. FML

#16017887
256 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21639) - you deserved it (41298)

On 05/02/2011 at 10:30am - work - by MathTeacher (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I auditioned for my school's production of Romeo and Juliet. When they announced that I got the part as Juliet, all the guys auditioning for Romeo suddenly disappeared. FML

#15260385
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41110) - you deserved it (5390)

On 03/10/2011 at 7:36am - misc - by Juliet -

Today, while walking to my car through the snow, I noticed the sunroof was open and 2 feet of snow had poured in. Angry, I opened the door to start cleaning. That's when I noticed all the wildlife that had taken refuge inside from the cold. Not only were my seat cushions wet, they were torn open. FML

#9085698
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8377) - you deserved it (21766)

On 03/14/2010 at 9:39pm - misc - by grann (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was in my car and a cute guy pulled up next to me. He looked at me and smiled, but in order to be cool, I pretended not to notice. I also pretended that I was listening to music and was completely absorbed in it, singing passionately. I wasn't even listening to music and my window was down. FML

#3531560
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6520) - you deserved it (76196)

On 07/06/2009 at 6:36pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)



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