![[fr]](http://cdn1.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_fr_hover.gif)
![[it]](http://cdn3.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_it_hover.gif)
![[es2]](http://cdn3.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_es2_hover.gif)
![[tr]](http://cdn2.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_tr_hover.gif)
![[de]](http://cdn2.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_de_hover.gif)
![[ru]](http://cdn5.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_ru_hover.gif)
![[se]](http://cdn2.fmylife.com/fmylife/images/flag_se_hover.gif)
About nissanman : In my mind, the speed limit is purely optional.
YDI master
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
Fingerprints everywhere
You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Today, after my old downstairs neighbor, who would come upstairs to bang on my door and yell at me every time she heard a sound from me at all times of the day, had finally moved out, it became clear that my new downstairs neighbor gets drunk and yells at the TV in the early hours of the morning. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3606) - you deserved it (367)
On 05/24/2012 at 8:59am - misc - by howsthisforaname (woman) - United Kingdom (Kingston upon Hull, City of)
Today, I was to give a presentation to several of my company's senior employees. The moment I stood up, I accidentally let rip a monstrous fart that lasted a good two or three seconds. When I tried to utter an apology, I clammed up and let out a whiny grunt. They were not amused. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5164) - you deserved it (1052)
On 05/23/2012 at 4:38pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)
Today, I was jumped and savagely beaten to the ground by a group of six-year-olds wearing Disney princess masks. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5218) - you deserved it (1355)
On 05/18/2012 at 10:13am - kids - by 23yearoldtoddler - United States
Today, I tried to swallow a spoonful of cinnamon. I ended up vomiting chunks of burgers, all while bleeding from the nose and suffering throbbing testicles. I then had to clean it all up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (1497) - you deserved it (12246)
On 05/18/2012 at 3:41am - health - by TLJ321 -
Today, I wanted to prank my roommate. So, I thought it would be funny to take all the toilet paper out of our bathroom. She thought it would be funny to wipe with my cashmere sweater. FML
I agree, your life sucks (1397) - you deserved it (11654)
On 05/18/2012 at 2:07am - misc - by Karmaisabitch - United States (Colorado)
Today, as part of my medical anatomy course, I had to give a presentation about an STD and the effects it has on women. The class was comprised almost entirely of girls. I become extremely anxious and accidentally stated "Vaginas are smelly" as my opening statement. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3455) - you deserved it (5947)
On 05/17/2012 at 4:14pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, my first date consisted of him and me in the emergency room of the hospital after his little brother hit me in the face with a baseball bat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6144) - you deserved it (436)
On 05/17/2012 at 1:05am - misc - by secret_source (woman) - United States
Today, I finally got the chance to meet this wonderful guy I met on a dating site. She was very excited to see me, too. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6230) - you deserved it (1147)
On 05/16/2012 at 1:02pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I was at the supermarket checkout. I handed over my items, which included some tampons, tissues, and toilet roll. The security guard standing beside the cashier remarked loudly, "I'll be damned; she's flowing from every hole!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (10343) - you deserved it (1102) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Today, I attended a formal banquet. The host was delivering a speech, when I felt the urge to pee, so I tried to quietly excuse myself. My chair screeched over the floor as I got up, I tripped over my own feet, and I accidentally took the door leading outdoors, where I ended up peeing in shame. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5606) - you deserved it (948)
On 05/12/2012 at 10:21pm - misc - by Andy (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my apartment was robbed by my landlord. Her logic? "I own the building, and therefore everything in it." That TV cost more than my rent. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9370) - you deserved it (706)
On 05/04/2012 at 10:38am - money - by Eragons_Mommy92 - United States
Today, to avoid looking like a loser in front of his friends who all have girlfriends, my brother made up a perfect relationship. He asked me to give him a hickey in exchange for 50 euros. Our parents walked in on us. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3584) - you deserved it (12383) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 05/02/2012 at 1:06am - love - by Flip (woman) - France (Rhone-Alpes)
Today, my new dog unburied my old dog and chewed on his bones. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11945) - you deserved it (898)
On 04/24/2012 at 1:42am - animals - by jessica071509 - United States (Arizona)
Today, I had to get stitches on my foot and was then forced to wear a plastic bag on my foot while showering. The plastic bag made me slip in the shower and had to go back and get stitches in my forehead. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8214) - you deserved it (716)
On 04/15/2012 at 7:39pm - health - by Shone - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I introduced my Spanish friend to a girl I've had a crush on for a long time. Because he only spoke Spanish and she only spoke English, I was the translator. The first thing he said to her was, "You are really pretty." I translated it as "I like other men." Later, they found out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5105) - you deserved it (22355)
On 04/15/2012 at 2:49am - love - by needurlove (man) - United States (Idaho)
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML 
Follow the FML blog Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
