nissa0909

Search for a member

Offline (the 04/20/2016 at 5:40am)

nissa0909

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 942
  • Number of comments : 19
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

This member hasn't filled in their description.

nissa0909's page activity

Visits<b>aliveinthelights</b> - the 01/21/2015 at 9:03pm<b>facelick</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 10:25am<b>ironhead</b> - the 04/09/2014 at 5:49pm<b>Sjus</b> - the 09/25/2013 at 5:24pm<b>BrotherPhil</b> - the 09/21/2013 at 2:18am<b>thistrifelife</b> - the 09/20/2013 at 2:57pm<b>Neyuu</b> - the 08/03/2013 at 5:26am<b>Welshite</b> - the 07/28/2013 at 7:04pm<b>fuckyourlifeOP</b> - the 07/28/2013 at 3:50am<b>Wizardo</b> - the 07/24/2013 at 2:23pm<b>Reva750</b> - the 07/19/2013 at 2:11am<b>Alwaysontherun</b> - the 05/24/2013 at 9:08pm<b>theWulff</b> - the 05/24/2013 at 2:53pm<b>1PersonIsMyWorld</b> - the 05/16/2013 at 12:11am<b>beatlesgirl2u2</b> - the 05/10/2013 at 9:16pm<b>dead_insects</b> - the 05/09/2013 at 2:16am<b>sillybilly132</b> - the 05/01/2013 at 6:25pm<b>karlcolt45</b> - the 04/29/2013 at 12:09pm

nissa0909's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of nissa0909's badges

nissa0909's favorite FMLs

Today, after discovering that our son is already sexually active, I asked my husband to have a talk with him. "Remember, son, it's all about the clit", wasn't what I had in mind. FML

by Anonymous / 06/08/2013 at 6:34am / United States (Alabama) / Intimacy

Today, after months of being pestered to do so, I finally read the first Harry Potter book. I hated it. Upon hearing this, my girlfriend posted the fact on Facebook, where I immediately received tons of abuse and eventual shunning by my friends, family, and coworkers. My girlfriend just laughed. FML

by obnum / 05/24/2013 at 8:26am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, my stalker ex girlfriend turned up at my wedding, uninvited, wearing a wedding dress. FML

by tdrtnlz / 05/11/2013 at 2:25am / United Kingdom (Warwickshire) / Love

Today, my little sister figured out how to use the printer. I came home to pictures of Nicolas Cage all over my room. FML

by Anonymous / 04/02/2013 at 5:22am / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, I went to my daughter's room with clean laundry. I found her lying on her bed with a hand down her pants, totally zoned out and staring blankly at the Justin Bieber poster on her wall. FML

by parental failure / 03/03/2013 at 12:03pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I'm so poor that I've been scrounging around my house all day trying to find quarters and dimes so that I can buy myself a cup of coffee tomorrow. FML

by Anonymous / 02/25/2013 at 3:39am / Canada (Saskatchewan) / Money

Today, I was chatting to a co-worker, upon whom I have a serious crush. It was going really well, until he said "irregardless", as if it's actually a proper word. This grammatical abomination really ticks me off, and I actually had to fight back the urge to beat some damn sense into him. FML

by Rebecca / 06/13/2012 at 7:50pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Love

Today, after having sex with my girlfriend, I jokingly held the condom above my mouth. Somehow, the condom busted, and everything went over my face. Worse still, we're now wondering just how safe this condom really was. FML

by Rob / 06/06/2012 at 12:02pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, in a parking lot, a girl came up to our car and started to knock on the window and scream, "I KNEW IT!" My girlfriend doesn't believe that I don't know her. FML

by Apissedoffguy / 06/03/2012 at 11:20am / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, it's been three weeks since I started using a hair-growth shampoo in the hopes of combating my balding. All it's done so far is make the hair I do have monstrously bushy, both upstairs and down. FML

by bear / 05/21/2012 at 6:47pm / Norway (Nordland) / Health

Today, my boyfriend asked me to marry him, saying that the only thing he would change about me is my last name. I later told him that I wanted to keep my last name after the marriage. I'm now single again. FML

by singleagain / 05/14/2012 at 9:09pm / United States / Love

Today, my wife told me she was pregnant. I don't remember having sex since last year. FML

by rj / 05/12/2012 at 10:42am / United States (Kansas) / Intimacy

Today, I shot a paintball gun at a bees' nest. The bees flew through my neighbors' windows and, for lack of a better word, slaughtered them. An ambulance was called, and I feel like a total dick. FML

by Anonymous / 04/30/2012 at 5:34pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to explain to a potential client that I wouldn't represent him, because suing his neighbor for calling him a pansy would get us laughed out of court and likely get me disbarred. His response was to get violent and threaten to sue me for violating his civil rights. FML

by A Henderson / 04/25/2012 at 4:50pm / United States / Work

Today, I came down with food poisoning of some sort. After hours of scrambling to the toilet to vomit and empty my bowels, my three-year-old daughter got fed up and is now trying to potty-train me. FML

by Anonymous / 04/22/2012 at 1:12pm / United States (Texas) / Kids