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nissa0909's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 06/08/2013 at 6:34am / United States (Alabama) / Intimacy
Today, after months of being pestered to do so, I finally read the first Harry Potter book. I hated it. Upon hearing this, my girlfriend posted the fact on Facebook, where I immediately received tons of abuse and eventual shunning by my friends, family, and coworkers. My girlfriend just laughed. FML
by obnum / 05/24/2013 at 8:26am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
by tdrtnlz / 05/11/2013 at 2:25am / United Kingdom (Warwickshire) / Love
by Anonymous / 04/02/2013 at 5:22am / United States (New York) / Kids
by parental failure / 03/03/2013 at 12:03pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 02/25/2013 at 3:39am / Canada (Saskatchewan) / Money
Today, I was chatting to a co-worker, upon whom I have a serious crush. It was going really well, until he said "irregardless", as if it's actually a proper word. This grammatical abomination really ticks me off, and I actually had to fight back the urge to beat some damn sense into him. FML
by Rebecca / 06/13/2012 at 7:50pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Love
Today, after having sex with my girlfriend, I jokingly held the condom above my mouth. Somehow, the condom busted, and everything went over my face. Worse still, we're now wondering just how safe this condom really was. FML
by Rob / 06/06/2012 at 12:02pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy
by Apissedoffguy / 06/03/2012 at 11:20am / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous
Today, it's been three weeks since I started using a hair-growth shampoo in the hopes of combating my balding. All it's done so far is make the hair I do have monstrously bushy, both upstairs and down. FML
by bear / 05/21/2012 at 6:47pm / Norway (Nordland) / Health
Today, my boyfriend asked me to marry him, saying that the only thing he would change about me is my last name. I later told him that I wanted to keep my last name after the marriage. I'm now single again. FML
by singleagain / 05/14/2012 at 9:09pm / United States / Love
by rj / 05/12/2012 at 10:42am / United States (Kansas) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 04/30/2012 at 5:34pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I had to explain to a potential client that I wouldn't represent him, because suing his neighbor for calling him a pansy would get us laughed out of court and likely get me disbarred. His response was to get violent and threaten to sue me for violating his civil rights. FML
by A Henderson / 04/25/2012 at 4:50pm / United States / Work
Today, I came down with food poisoning of some sort. After hours of scrambling to the toilet to vomit and empty my bowels, my three-year-old daughter got fed up and is now trying to potty-train me. FML
by Anonymous / 04/22/2012 at 1:12pm / United States (Texas) / Kids