About ninneyfooda : I may be trying to increase my 'badges' to be cool...
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ninneyfooda's favorite FMLs
by wallet? GONE / 04/21/2013 at 6:27pm / United States (Colorado) / Money
Today, I had to explain to my girlfriend that taking triple the maximum dosage of painkillers won't actually triple its effects. She rolled her eyes, called me clueless, and said that I should "leave this stuff to the professionals." She's studying to become a doctor. FML
by Anonymous / 04/21/2013 at 1:36pm / Kuwait (Al Kuwayt) / Miscellaneous
Today, while at the store with my mom, we ran into the girl I recently confessed to being interested in. My mom decided to shout, "IS THAT HER?! IS THAT THE GIRL YOU LIKE?!" Embarrassed, I desperately told her to be quiet. She grounded me for being "rude" to her. FML
by Anonymous / 02/15/2013 at 7:39pm / Italy (Lombardia) / Love
by Anonymous / 07/16/2011 at 7:09pm / United States / Transportation
Today, I was arrested by the police for sitting in what they thought was a stolen vehicle. After being slammed into the back of a squad car at gun point, they realized the car was actually recovered a week ago. FML
by bustedfornuthin / 09/08/2010 at 12:42am / United States (New Mexico) / Transportation
Today, at work, I was reprimanded for not engaging with customers enough. In an effort to be more friendly, I complimented the next customer on her interesting accent. Turns out it was from a stroke she had last year. FML
by Flippy / 08/28/2010 at 8:05pm / United States (Washington) / Work
by mrmidi / 05/21/2010 at 1:04am / United States (Oregon) / Health
by Anonymous / 08/05/2009 at 1:15am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
Today, while riding on the car with my family, I put on my headphones and pretended to be listening to music and when my parents talked to me, I pretended I couldn't hear them. They took this opportunity to discuss how fat I was and how I can't hold down a boyfriend. They were laughing as well. FML
by Solemnwishing / 07/13/2009 at 2:33pm / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was watching a movie with my boyfriend. His dog, Baxter, has a bad farting problem. I decided it would be okay to let a silent fart out and blame the dog. Baxter was outside when I blamed him. FML
by silentbutdeadly / 04/27/2009 at 6:04pm / United States (Maryland) / Animals
Today, I was on a blind date with a girl my friend set me up with. We went to a fancy restaurant and she ordered the shrimp. I told her, "I'm allergic to shrimp, so you shouldn't order it in case I want to kiss you later." She looked at the waiter and said, "I'll have the shrimp." FML
by johnfrank / 03/26/2009 at 1:11pm / United States (Michigan) / Love