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ninjasideoven

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ninjasideoven

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  • Number of visits : 343
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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ninjasideoven's page activity

Visits<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:40pm<b>wtfismyfml</b> - the 12/13/2009 at 5:08pm

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ninjasideoven's favorite FMLs

Today, I was in a public restroom with my 4 year old daughter. I took her in the stall with me, and as I was using the restroom she looked down and loudly asked, "Mommy! Why do you have a beard on your peepee?!!" Then I heard everybody in the stalls next to us laughing. FML

#12677495
262 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41719) - you deserved it (12563)

On 08/22/2010 at 2:58am - kids - by Bailey - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I was walking down the street and spotted a man who was about 6 and a half feet tall passing by me. As he passed me, I turned and asked him "How's the weather up there?" He then turned around, spat on me, and replied "Raining." FML

#12099804
308 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12619) - you deserved it (113034)

On 07/25/2010 at 5:06am - misc - by spriggs (man) - United States (California)

Today, I got bitch-slapped by a walrus at Sea Life Park. FML

#11841759
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37352) - you deserved it (9678)

On 07/13/2010 at 12:34am - misc - by Betchsadface - United States

Today, I got married. I was so nervous right before I said my vows that, in the dead silence, I farted. Loud. My brother showed me afterwards, on tape, over and over and over again. FML

#11028124
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38306) - you deserved it (6760)

On 06/07/2010 at 3:03am - love - by flipflop - United States (California)

Today, I had one more gift to buy: a copy of Fight Club. I asked a person working at Best Buy if they had any in stock. The man wouldn't sell me the last copy because I had broken the first two rules. FML

#6923345
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26712) - you deserved it (11831)

On 12/24/2009 at 3:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I had to perform with my Orchestra at an event. I hadn't eaten at all because I had to get my blood sugar tested. During the middle of a song I passed out. No one helped me and no one stopped playing "because the song wasn't over and they didn't want to ruin the performance." FML

#6724178
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25996) - you deserved it (5455)

On 12/12/2009 at 4:13pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I learned my wife wasn't speaking to me because our daughter told her I kissed another woman. My daughter neglected to mention that this happened when she came to work with me yesterday, and the kiss was between me and the dummy I use to teach my interns CPR. My wife doesn't believe me. FML

#6581083
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36503) - you deserved it (2349)

On 12/03/2009 at 6:34am - love - by fmldr (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I got in a hotel elevator. There was a kid in there also. He got off on the 3rd floor. As he was stepping from the elevator, he decided to press every single button. It's a 35 floor hotel. My room is on the 32nd floor. FML

Today, I woke up to find my house TP'd. I also noticed our entire house was devoid of toilet paper. Someone had broken in just to steal our toilet paper and TP our own house with it. FML

#6382728
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29751) - you deserved it (2635)

On 11/20/2009 at 6:50pm - misc - by WhyTheEff (man) - United States (California)

Today, I must find a gentle way to tell my 71-year-old mother that she's too old to be wearing shirts that expose her belly. FML

#5359755
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37451) - you deserved it (2578)

On 09/19/2009 at 9:22pm - misc - by elmalo68 (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML

#56665
505 comments

I agree, your life sucks (232555) - you deserved it (81231)

On 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm - kids - by offbeans (man) - United States (California)

Today, I found out my teacher writes descriptions next to people's names on the register to remind him who people were. By mistake the descriptions appeared on the computer projector. Next to my name it said "Tubby". FML

#30377
28 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39879) - you deserved it (4745)

On 02/12/2009 at 8:37am - misc - by atterz123 (man) - United Kingdom (Lincolnshire)



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