About nightwishs : I'm married to an ex army commando, I'm originally from Sydney, I rescue animals. At the moment my husband and I have five ferrets, a cat, a British giant rabbit, two frogs and countless fish! I love tattoos ( hate when they get called tats) I have over thirteen of them a few tattooed by me. I love music, all kind of metal! I am NOT gothic... Mearly a whimsical metal head who happens to like the alternative scene. I love people and most people love me! I'm honest... Very honest! I hate liars. My name is Paige! I've been singing since I was five. Motor bikes are sexy... Cars can be to! I love old stuff, I collect suits of armour! Ask me more questions :)
nightwishs's FML badges
Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
nightwishs's favorite FMLs
Today, I was sitting in the park with my new dog; I got her from the pound last week. We were enjoying the sun when I noticed that every time a black person walked past, she'd bark like crazy. Great, my dog is a racist. FML
by Anonymous / 10/02/2012 at 3:10am / United States (California) / Animals
Today, I was getting a bikini wax to prove to my husband that I could be sexy despite being five months pregnant. As the woman was applying the wax, she said, "You know, if I wanted to, I'm in the perfect spot to reach in and steal that baby." FML
by Anonymous / 10/02/2012 at 1:01am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, a woman stopped me and started chewing me out for wearing a pentagram necklace. I explained to her that is wasn't a pentagram, it was a Star of David. She continued chewing me out because apparently that still means I hate Jesus. FML
by raz / 10/01/2012 at 8:11pm / United States (North Dakota) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 10/01/2012 at 10:50am / Sweden (Stockholms Lan) / Miscellaneous
Today, my brother saw my side when my shirt came up, and asked when I got a tattoo; the pink he saw was in fact my stretch marks. Worst of all, I had to show them to everyone to prove I didn't actually get a tattoo. FML
by screw life / 10/01/2012 at 7:35am / United States / Health
Today, a man with a clipboard came up to me in the street to ask me if I was happy with my life insurance. I couldn't bring myself to admit to him that I'm so clueless about my own life that I wasn't sure I was even happy with the Twix I was eating at the time. FML
by Anonymous / 09/30/2012 at 8:49pm / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 09/30/2012 at 7:02pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy
Today, I was babysitting a six year old girl, when I saw a huge spider on the wall. I screamed and told her to stay back. Instead, she walked up to the spider, squished it, and told me to stop being such a baby. FML
by Anonymous / 09/30/2012 at 1:57pm / Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen) / Kids
by emilyhendrix0414 / 09/28/2012 at 6:53am / United States / Animals
by strawberrywine22 / 09/27/2012 at 10:14pm / United States (California) / Love
Today, my mom decided the time was right to give me the sex talk. Towards the end, I had to excuse myself to the bathroom. As I came back, I overheard my dad telling my mom that I'm so unpopular, the only time I'll get laid is when I'm being put in a coffin. FML
by linn / 09/27/2012 at 4:14pm / United States / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 09/26/2012 at 10:23am / Canada / Health
by bacon lovers worst nightmare / 09/26/2012 at 2:57am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I saw a shady looking person on the street. As I walked past him, he said, "Hey, come here." Thinking he needed something, I went over. He handed me several pictures of my wife, in public and at home. I've never seen this man before in my life. FML
by ahappypenguin / 09/26/2012 at 12:07am / Miscellaneous
Today, I asked my husband to watch our daughter while I ran a few errands. While he treated himself to a long nap, she decided our fish needed a bubble bath, and squeezed out an entire bottle of dish soap. I came home to bubbles all over the floor, five dead fish, and one sleeping husband. FML
by Anonymous / 09/25/2012 at 6:35pm / United States / Kids
- 1Today, I took a test. I got up to turn it in, and accidentally bumped into another student. We both… 2Today, I tried to fire the worst worker I've ever had over the phone because he never shows up for… 3Today, my energetic 10-month-old decided to stay up four hours past bedtime. After I FINALLY got…
- Today, during a family dinner with my grandparents, I showed them some pictures. One was a picture… Today, after recently moving to Australia, I saw my first kangaroo. In the refrigerated section of… Today, my mom had to go to one of her relatives’ funeral. She came to borrow a black scarf from me,…