nightwishs

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nightwishs

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 8 November 1989 (26 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2830
  • Number of comments : 90
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 13 posted

About nightwishs : I'm married to an ex army commando, I'm originally from Sydney, I rescue animals. At the moment my husband and I have five ferrets, a cat, a British giant rabbit, two frogs and countless fish! I love tattoos ( hate when they get called tats) I have over thirteen of them a few tattooed by me. I love music, all kind of metal! I am NOT gothic... Mearly a whimsical metal head who happens to like the alternative scene. I love people and most people love me! I'm honest... Very honest! I hate liars. My name is Paige! I've been singing since I was five. Motor bikes are sexy... Cars can be to! I love old stuff, I collect suits of armour! Ask me more questions :)

nightwishs's page activity

Visits<b>RawrPancaked</b> - the 10/22/2015 at 2:38pm<b>thatsbs123</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 3:50pm<b>Baller_Bob</b> - the 12/10/2013 at 7:13am<b>Drag0nb0rn</b> - the 09/17/2013 at 11:29pm<b>matticus27</b> - the 04/11/2013 at 8:47am<b>mariam55</b> - the 03/28/2013 at 5:36am<b>B5B0N35</b> - the 12/19/2012 at 4:42pm<b>Nakoma</b> - the 07/09/2012 at 2:29pm<b>mehwhocares</b> - the 07/09/2012 at 1:13pm<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 07/05/2012 at 12:37pm<b>tj4234</b> - the 05/20/2012 at 8:14pm<b>Strychnine</b> - the 05/10/2012 at 10:12pm

nightwishs's FML badges

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

See all of nightwishs's badges

nightwishs's favorite FMLs

Today, my friends and I were playing truth or dare game. It was late and we were drunk, so they dared me to run naked into my neighbor's yard while yelling, "Help! The pixies took my penis!" I ran screaming right into their big family reunion. FML

by nekkidness / 11/21/2012 at 4:06pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dog climbed onto the dining room table to eat the cat's food. Then whined until I showed him how to get down. He does this every night. My dog is a genius. FML

by Anonymous / 11/21/2012 at 12:00am / United States (Florida) / Animals

Today, a nearby volcano erupted for the second time. We were all urged to keep our windows and doors closed in case of ash clouds. My father responded by opening every window and door and shouting, "Come at me, bro!" FML

by vanillatwilight2 / 11/20/2012 at 11:50pm / New Zealand (Auckland) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I took a crowded train home. I was holding on to the rail when an old man started rubbing his crotch across my hand. I moved my hand but he moved too and kept doing it. When I moved my hand higher, he started licking it. I had to wait ten minutes for the next stop. FML

by needanewride / 11/15/2012 at 9:40pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Transportation

Today, I brought a fluorescent tube to the store to make sure I got the correct replacement. Trying to charm the sexy cashier, I waved the tube in the air, saying "I need a new light sabre, there is no force left in this one and the Empire is attacking." Turns out she'd never heard of Star Wars. FML

Today, my girlfriend snapped at me for being lazy and incompetent, and declared that if I was going to behave like a child, she would be treating me like one. This includes safety-proofing the house, talking to me like a 3-year-old and slapping me with a wooden spoon when I do something wrong. FML

by Z / 11/13/2012 at 7:43pm / Australia / Love

Today, I found a wounded turkey in our backyard. I brought it inside, put it in a cage, and tended to its wounds. I then left. When I got back home, I smelled the wonderful aroma of my mother's cooking. She had prepared a turkey, the one I'd rescued. FML

by Anonymous / 11/13/2012 at 6:17pm / United States (Vermont) / Animals

Today, I arrived home after a hard day's work to see my 12-year-old sister had greased up my 8-year-old brother with butter and olive oil, and was attempting to slide him down the wooden floorboards in the hallway. FML

by Anonymous / 11/13/2012 at 5:00am / New Zealand (Wellington) / Kids

Today, I woke up after a night of drinking to find that while I was passed out someone stole my prosthetic leg. FML

by poserpilot / 11/12/2012 at 10:10am / United States (California) / Health

Today, the father of my unborn child told me he isn't sure he'll be able to make it to the birth, since there's no guarantee of when it will happen, so he can't schedule time off. This would be understandable if he actually had a job. FML

by Anonymous / 11/11/2012 at 1:50pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I stepped outside the house with my wife. She looked up at the sky and asked me in all seriousness if stars are man-made. FML

by baby, baby no / 11/09/2012 at 1:39pm / United States (South Carolina) / Love

Today, I was told that my insurance will no longer cover my birth control as it's deemed "unnecessary" for a man, which, according to them, I've been since August. I'm definitely still a woman. FML

by pheebs314 / 11/07/2012 at 4:16pm / United States (Washington) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was bitched out by my supervisor because of my lack of "customer service" skills. I work at a jail and all my "customers" are criminals. FML

by jailofc / 11/07/2012 at 12:48am / United States (Arizona) / Work

Today, I found a limp head of celery in the fridge. I thought it looked like the squid alien baby from Men in Black. After nursing it for a couple of hours, giving it food, and rocking it to sleep, my parents found me. Then I realised it was just celery. Too bad it took that long for my meds to kick in. FML

by Squid / 11/07/2012 at 12:11am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found a limp head of celery in the fridge. I thought it looked like the squid alien baby from Men in Black. After nursing it for a couple of hours, giving it food, and rocking it to sleep, my parents found me. Then I realised it was just celery. Too bad it took that long for my meds to kick in. FML

by Squid / 11/07/2012 at 12:11am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous