nightslayer

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nightslayer

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Friday 1 June 1990 (26 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 7149
  • Number of comments : 37
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About nightslayer : Well yeah

nightslayer's page activity

Visits<b>mkmon7</b> - the 05/28/2016 at 5:22pm<b>natty11</b> - the 01/15/2016 at 11:24pm<b>JLBavard</b> - the 12/17/2015 at 6:45pm<b>Envy22</b> - the 10/28/2015 at 12:50pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/27/2015 at 4:24pm<b>Jennandco</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 10:57am<b>grimmangel13</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 7:53pm<b>alexmac222</b> - the 01/03/2014 at 9:19pm<b>kjblack</b> - the 04/14/2013 at 2:24am<b>Bobissmall</b> - the 09/21/2011 at 4:07am<b>sammybearbby</b> - the 08/06/2011 at 8:41pm

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nightslayer's favorite FMLs

Today, I was sitting at the computer browsing various websites. In my attempt to scoot the chair forward, I hit my knee against the desk that my computer was on, and ended up breaking it. I literally broke my knee sitting on my ass. FML

by Charles / 06/21/2011 at 12:59pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Health

Today, I was eating Star Wars gummy candies and I bit R2-D2 in half. My girlfriend looked at it and said "Oh look, now he's R1-D1". It was super cute, but I couldn't help thinking, "That's not how the numbering system works for droids." FML

by techiefIve / 06/14/2011 at 6:04am / United States (California) / Geek

Today, I was at the park with my daughter. She walked up to a boy at the swings, held her hand out, and said, "Hi I'm Vanessa, and someday you'll be working for me." FML

by Rachel / 06/10/2011 at 5:57am / United States (Alabama) / Kids

Today, I was reading a crappy "How to spice up your marriage" book with my husband for laughs. One of the ideas was for the guy to whip his knob out, stand behind his girl and say "Can you say that into the microphone?" Now he does it every chance he gets, and I fall for it EVERY TIME. FML

by Kate / 06/07/2011 at 3:50am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I thought it would be hot if I sent my boyfriend kinky message. He didn't reply so I sent a few more. 10 minutes later I got a reply saying, "Honey, this is his mom and you should be a little less desperate." FML

by yup / 06/05/2011 at 3:23am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, my friend pushed me into the swimming pool. Unfortunately, we were eight feet away from the actual pool, so I face-planted and rolled in. FML

by kyle / 06/05/2011 at 3:00am / United States (Ohio) / Health

Today, I found out my ex boyfriend's band has become quite popular on YouTube. My friends and sister won't stop singing their songs. Most of them were written after I dumped him, and go on to say how much better off he is without me and how horrible I am. FML

by guttedgirl / 06/04/2011 at 7:35am / United Kingdom (Staffordshire) / Love

Today, my girlfriend told me how she loves when I kiss her out of the blue. I don't have the heart to admit I only do it so I can get some peace and quiet for a few seconds. FML

by romantic84 / 05/31/2011 at 12:51am / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I accidentally said, "Yes, Sir." to my female teacher. I then apologized by saying, "Sorry, Sir." FML

by OopsKid / 05/30/2011 at 2:14pm / France / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because of something I said 2 years ago, as a joke. I guess she took a while to get it. FML

by Username / 05/29/2011 at 12:41am / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, my sister and I were eating at Wendy's. On the way out, I thought it would be funny to kick the door open and yell, "This is Sparta!" I lost my balance and fell flat on my butt. FML

by taydean / 05/26/2011 at 5:31pm / United States (Colorado) / Health

Today, I went to hand in a resume. The secretary happened to be a girl I liked in high school. When leaving, I shook hands with the employer, waved goodbye to the girl, turned around and walked straight into a glass wall. FML

by Fred / 05/26/2011 at 2:00am / Canada (Alberta) / Work

Today, my boyfriend told me I looked pretty. I said, "Aww, that's the first time you've said that to me." He replied, "Well, it's the first time you've looked pretty." FML

by Username / 05/25/2011 at 12:06pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, I went on a blind date at a fancy restaurant. My date was running a bit late, so I went ahead and got a table. I got bored, so I decided to ask my waiter how I looked. He stood there, then said that "it's against company policy to mock customers to their face." FML

by BurnedByAWaiter / 05/24/2011 at 9:59am / Miscellaneous

Today, my family went to Seaworld. When we got there, my dad sarcastically told me not to get lost, because I might get mistaken for Shamu. FML

by Username / 05/19/2011 at 6:46pm / United States / Miscellaneous