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nickbest077

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nickbest077
  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 67
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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nickbest077's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

nickbest077's favorite FMLs

Today, I was taking a piss when a fly landed inside the urinal. I thought it would be funny to try to aim and pee on it until it flew away and I stupidly continued aiming, peeing all over the floor and the wall. Another man came in time to see it. FML

#21026318
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21343) - you deserved it (47501)

On 01/13/2014 at 2:34am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Hawaii)

Today, after working my shift at McDonalds, I went to clock in at my dispatch job. During a 911 call, I blurted, "Would you like to try the McRib while it's back?" FML

#21023934
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44400) - you deserved it (8167)

On 01/10/2014 at 9:25pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while I was working, someone came in and attempted to purchase GTA 5 with a medical marijuana card. FML

#20892589
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35642) - you deserved it (2596)

On 09/23/2013 at 2:15am - work - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my 18-year-old daughter texted me and told me that she got in a car crash. She texted, "I forgot wich way wus left lol" and then quickly added "yolo right? Lol". FML

#20814697
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53831) - you deserved it (8959)

On 08/01/2013 at 2:21am - kids - by father of the year - United States

Today, my 16-year-old son broke two of his fingers playing with Play-Doh. FML

#20735100
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42042) - you deserved it (4060)

On 06/19/2013 at 12:12pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I witnessed an elderly lady getting mugged. I ran over to the guy mugging her and offered him the money in my wallet in return for him leaving her alone. The old lady snatched my money and ran away with the mugger. What the hell just happened? FML

#20733745
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50943) - you deserved it (8423)

On 06/18/2013 at 6:01pm - money - by No money, mo' problems - United States

Today, my best friend called me a moron for disputing her belief that Canada is in South America. FML

#20729679
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41207) - you deserved it (3651)

On 06/16/2013 at 4:20pm - misc - by not a brain cell in sight (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was walking down the stairs with my guitar in hand, singing "I Don't Wanna Miss a Thing" to my wife. I sang, "I don't wanna close my eyes, I don't wanna fall". Before I could say "asleep", I fell down the stairs. My wife almost pissed her pants laughing. My bum hurts. FML

#20691071
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61552) - you deserved it (13915)

On 05/28/2013 at 12:37pm - love - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I saw a coin on the ground. As I bent over to pick it up, some dude came up from behind, grabbed my waist and humped me three times. He ran away before I could get a good look at his face. FML

#20664572
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49251) - you deserved it (8662)

On 05/15/2013 at 4:08am - misc - by asdffhhjk (man) - Philippines (Manila)

Today, I was wearing a black shirt, black pants, and a black beanie at a grocery store. I came around a corner, bumped into a woman and she screamed, "Murderer." I was immediately thrown out. FML

#20664547
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42113) - you deserved it (9278)

On 05/15/2013 at 3:20am - misc - by notarobber (man) - United States (California)

Today, a homeless man tried to sell me a "magic, one-finger glove". It was a used condom. FML

#19838531
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24198) - you deserved it (2047)

On 06/24/2012 at 10:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, a homeless man tried to sell me a "magic, one-finger glove". It was a used condom. FML

#19838531
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24198) - you deserved it (2047)

On 06/24/2012 at 10:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)



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  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

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