Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

nerdtron430

Offline (3 hours ago) | Search for a member

nerdtron430

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 6090
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

nerdtron430's page activity

Visits<b>abdiG</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 5:51pm<b>sawq1023</b> - the 05/21/2014 at 1:57pm<b>coraline123c</b> - the 03/22/2014 at 6:25am<b>Wizardo</b> - the 02/22/2014 at 6:53am<b>alexmac222</b> - the 01/13/2014 at 4:58pm<b>Torrey_Turner</b> - the 01/04/2014 at 9:12pm<b>Teyros</b> - the 11/02/2013 at 10:33pm<b>Typicall</b> - the 10/18/2013 at 5:20pm<b>KatieMajestic</b> - the 10/08/2013 at 1:38am<b>Amelia_Jones237</b> - the 09/13/2013 at 12:13am<b>Faith13</b> - the 09/06/2013 at 1:07am<b>xXNexus13Xx</b> - the 08/28/2013 at 5:21pm<b>AGhost5445</b> - the 08/20/2013 at 8:19am<b>Catkam623</b> - the 08/18/2013 at 12:34am<b>pdp</b> - the 07/31/2013 at 7:09am<b>buckdharma</b> - the 07/05/2013 at 9:20pm<b>xAttackAttackx</b> - the 06/25/2013 at 2:46am<b>mattyice22</b> - the 05/21/2013 at 12:21am

nerdtron430's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of nerdtron430's badges

nerdtron430's favorite FMLs

Today, my husband's laziness got so bad that he asked me to jack him off while he watched porn because he was "too tired" to do it himself. FML

#21258768
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20569) - you deserved it (2361)

On 09/15/2014 at 1:13pm - intimacy - by lovelyanimetits (woman) - Netherlands (Utrecht)

Today, my college did a fire drill, and instructions were given by intercom in English and Spanish. The guy beside me mused: "If they say it in English and Mexican, why not say it in Black too?" That guy is my idiot brother, and he was dead serious. Sometimes I think our parents are related. FML

#21257016
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30932) - you deserved it (2518)

On 09/12/2014 at 4:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I watched with mild confusion as a piece of paper tucked underneath my windshield wiper flapped around on the highway. What could it be? Surely not a parking ticket. Powerless, I watched it fly away. It must have been the insurance information for the person who swiped the back of my car. FML

Today, I was driving to the DMV to take a test, after getting some points removed from my license. On the way there, I got a speeding ticket and got my license suspended completely. FML

#21256258
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15960) - you deserved it (42413)

On 09/11/2014 at 11:44am - misc - by hockusa3 - United States (Maryland)

Today, my daughter's teacher called me, very concerned, because my child told the whole class she's not virgin anymore. The word is "vegan", honey. FML

#21253313
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37165) - you deserved it (3392)

On 09/06/2014 at 9:57pm - kids - by healthfreak - United States (Georgia)

Today, my husband asked our tax professional if we could file my profession as "Expert Dream Murderer." I'm a guidance counselor. FML

#21251173
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33757) - you deserved it (4505)

On 09/03/2014 at 2:24pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I wrecked my car because my mom texted me, telling me not to text and drive. FML

#21249597
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22537) - you deserved it (39336)

On 09/01/2014 at 10:08am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I learned that while other people drunk call their exes, I drunk adopt cats. Seven cats, to be exact. FML

#21248352
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40439) - you deserved it (9425)

On 08/30/2014 at 7:56am - animals - by cat lady (woman) - Norway (Rogaland)

Today, my new boyfriend and I got intimate for the first time. He started whispering in my ear, but I couldn't understand him. He pushed me away and ignored me the rest of the night. Apparently it's a huge turn-off that I can't talk dirty in Klingon. FML

#21246884
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42470) - you deserved it (4916)

On 08/28/2014 at 12:34am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was watching the movie Frozen with my 8 year old daughter. I had seen it before, so I sung along with some of the songs. My daughter put a finger over my lips, said "Shhhhhhhhut the fuck up," then turned back to the TV, giggling. FML

#21245090
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36402) - you deserved it (13654)

On 08/25/2014 at 2:05pm - kids - by JackieD (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I stuck one of those "kick me" signs on my friend's back for fun, and someone took the invitation. Unfortunately, my friend whirled around and beat the shit out of him. I managed to sneak the sign off his back, but now I feel like a total asshole. FML

#21243070
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19023) - you deserved it (44358)

On 08/22/2014 at 10:35am - misc - by oops (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I saw a bulge in my friend's pocket. I poked it and asked, "What'cha got there?" He said, "Uh, that's my dick, Mike." FML

#21235845
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38698) - you deserved it (23848)

On 08/12/2014 at 1:05pm - intimacy - by not a dick-man (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I dropped my kid into a crowded wishing fountain instead of a coin. FML

#21235686
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21534) - you deserved it (35489)

On 08/12/2014 at 6:21am - kids - by jake - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I attended a family gathering. My cousin's new baby was being passed around. By way of politely declining to hold it, I meant to say that I looked forward to getting to know it better once it could talk. What I blurted out instead was, "I can't wait until it resembles a human being." FML



FML's blog

  • Matteor's illustrated FML #2
  • So, is everyone back from their vacation? Can we get back to regular programming? No? OK, I get it. You're all still crying about not being at the beach any more, well, I am anyway. And this time of year…

Thursday 11 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: