neonvortex

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Offline (the 10/19/2016 at 10:15am)

neonvortex

6Fucked!

neonvortexneonvortex
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 13861
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About neonvortex : been here since 2011. just your average FML addict (with the exception of commenting :p)

neonvortex's page activity

Visits<b>Kiro476</b> - the 08/05/2016 at 11:58am<b>mineller</b> - the 07/12/2016 at 2:32am<b>weirdncrazy</b> - the 03/11/2016 at 1:47am<b>getoffmyscreen</b> - the 03/10/2016 at 9:35pm<b>Karau</b> - the 03/02/2016 at 4:26pm<b>Neut</b> - the 03/01/2016 at 12:29am<b>missa8604</b> - the 02/28/2016 at 11:25pm<b>Toonice45</b> - the 02/27/2016 at 7:00am<b>Michelle1121</b> - the 02/26/2016 at 10:29pm<b>karacakal2</b> - the 02/12/2016 at 3:58am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 01/29/2016 at 4:53pm<b>ananicosia</b> - the 01/29/2016 at 2:35pm<b>Feklfekl2222</b> - the 01/14/2016 at 8:50am<b>dirty_dan_</b> - the 01/09/2016 at 6:59pm<b>JMichael</b> - the 01/08/2016 at 11:40pm<b>Tripartita</b> - the 12/03/2015 at 2:42pm<b>Y0UI34574RD</b> - the 11/30/2015 at 8:23pm<b>Saraj07</b> - the 11/30/2015 at 10:56am

Fucked!<b>Toonice45</b> - the 12/17/2015 at 4:59am<b>LilMissCanadian</b> - the 10/28/2015 at 11:33pm<b>DogeDogeDoge</b> - the 10/20/2015 at 2:39am<b>karacakal2</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 6:15pm<b>venomXVII</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 3:25pm<b>olive_r</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 2:00am

neonvortex's FML badges

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

See all of neonvortex's badges

neonvortex's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to the store with my 4-year-old daughter. When I went to change into tight jeans which weren't completely on, my daughter opened the curtain and yelled: "It's the mommy show!" Everyone there heard her and saw me. FML

by Anonymous / 08/09/2015 at 8:37pm / United States (Texas) / Kids

Today, my girlfriend and I were making love. It got hot and intense and we were really into it, until she blurted out, "Oh baby, rub your penis against mine". FML

Today, I had to imagine myself savagely beating my cat to death, just to stop myself from getting a boner while a girl laid her head in my lap. FML

by strangely / 07/24/2015 at 8:12pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I lost out on a job opportunity because the interviewer said my "fake fangs are unprofessional and frankly disturbing". The "fangs" are my real canines, and they have always looked this way. FML

by (-,..,-) / 07/24/2015 at 1:24pm / France / Work

Today, while on my Dad's computer, I looked through the browser history to find the name of a website I'd visited on it the other day. I soon found out he watches a staggering amount of downright frightening incest porn. I'm disturbed on so many levels. FML

by Anonymous / 07/22/2015 at 7:52am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went downstairs early in the morning to watch a movie. As I walked into the living room and reached for the light switch, I heard my dad say "Knew you'd change your mind. Get them panties off." followed by the sound of a zipper being undone. I've never been so mortified in my life. FML

by Anonymous / 07/15/2015 at 12:29pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend admitted that he thinks I'm cheating on him, with my brother. FML

by dollfacee / 07/09/2015 at 12:51pm / United States / Love

Today, a week after my miscarriage, my little sister thought it appropriate to wrap her belt around her neck and scream, "Hey look, it's your baby!" FML

by Anonymous / 07/09/2015 at 10:38am / United Kingdom (Birmingham) / Kids

Today, I had to sit through an entire movie where every time a new character was introduced, the guy sitting behind me would say, "My name is Jeff." FML

Today, I walked outside to see the fireworks. I also got to see my neighbors burning a couch in the parking lot of my apartment complex to celebrate, right next to my car. FML

by hamiltonma / 07/04/2015 at 1:27pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my extremely religious mom ranted at me, saying I'd only bought an electric toothbrush so I could masturbate with it. I'm a guy. FML

by but cum to think of it... / 07/03/2015 at 5:29pm / Intimacy

Today, I had to profusely apologize to a woman after my six year old son decided to crawl between her legs at the supermarket, then look up her skirt and loudly ask why she didn't have any panties on. FML

by Anonymous / 07/03/2015 at 4:51pm / United States / Kids

Today, my boss is on the phone with a Russian customer, who keeps saying, "Speak Russian please!" My boss asks me to translate, as he hired me for my knowledge of Russian. He says something, I translate in Russian, then the customer says, "Speak English please!" FML

by Claudine / 06/30/2015 at 2:18am / Belgium (Liege) / Work

Today, a woman came through drive-thru and placed a long order while screaming at her kids in back. When we forgot a doughnut, she became enraged, threw her iced coffees at me, told me I was a no-life and that I always get her order wrong. It's my first day and I was only giving her the order. FML

by CoffeeGirl2000 / 06/29/2015 at 3:40pm / United States / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, another idiot was admitted to my hospital with a foreign object up his ass. Yet again, the excuse went along the lines of "I tripped and fell on it." Please, someone tell me how you can accidentally trip anus-first onto the end of a cucumber, which just so happens to have a condom on it. FML

by Idiot says "HIPAA violation" / 06/26/2015 at 9:21pm / United States (Virginia) / Work