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neonvortex

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neonvortex

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 7250
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About neonvortex : been here since 2011. just your average FML addict (with the exception of commenting :p)

neonvortex's page activity

Visits<b>spork_of_doom</b> - yesterday at 10:11pm<b>Ardeku</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 10:53pm<b>Mons</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 5:57am<b>Raelthelamb</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 6:40pm<b>p_diddy77</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 11:47am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 04/06/2015 at 11:53pm<b>Koizumie</b> - the 03/22/2015 at 3:22am<b>ohnowhyme123</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 9:02am<b>knightofdarkness</b> - the 03/19/2015 at 1:27am<b>FMLworthy5000</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 4:58am<b>tyler_jay</b> - the 03/14/2015 at 11:47pm<b>rkdstp1995</b> - the 03/14/2015 at 12:41pm<b>thatguynamedsky</b> - the 03/04/2015 at 12:06am<b>mosquito19</b> - the 02/18/2015 at 1:55am<b>MissEris</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 11:06pm<b>olive_r</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 8:00pm<b>K40RU</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 6:36pm<b>spockadelic</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 6:33pm

Fucked!<b>olive_r</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 2:00am

neonvortex's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of neonvortex's badges

neonvortex's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up because of a weird noise. Scared, I turned on my bedside lamp. I saw my older, 17-year-old brother peeing in my bedroom doorway. He was hoping I'd step in it in the morning. FML

#21231132
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38987) - you deserved it (2882)

On 08/06/2014 at 6:18pm - kids - by whymyroomthough (woman) - United States (California)

Today, at work, an old man was having trouble using his credit card at the checkout. I told him to "just stick it in", and he replied with "I love it when you talk dirty to me." The whole line at the checkout laughed. FML

#21228111
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49291) - you deserved it (21293)

On 08/03/2014 at 1:16am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I managed to not laugh as a potential high-profile Italian client with a heavy accent repeatedly pronounced "sheet metal" as "shit metal". Unfortunately, my boss and a senior colleague couldn't contain their own laughter. We lost that deal, and our jobs are now endangered. FML

#21227795
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37192) - you deserved it (4569)

On 08/02/2014 at 6:37pm - work - by Shitmetalseller (man) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)

Today, I was watching my 3 year old brother. He asked me to get him a cookie and I said, "What's the magic word?" He looked at me angrily and said "Bitch, please." FML

#21227114
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43526) - you deserved it (7057)

On 08/01/2014 at 9:57pm - kids - by WickedRene (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my fiancé said "Rachel" instead of my name when asked to repeat, "I take thee, Emily, to be my lawfully wedded wife." I was shocked, so he explained while laughing that he doesn't even know a Rachel. He ruined our wedding for a Friends quote. FML

Today, while wandering around the big city I just relocated to, I asked a seemingly pleasant-looking lady where the nearest library was. She told me to get lost, and started laughing. Then said she was just joking and gave me directions. I'm now standing in front of a gay strip joint. FML

#21225641
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42654) - you deserved it (4382)

On 07/31/2014 at 7:38am - misc - by lostintdot (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, a new session started for my swimming squad. I walked down to the pool, tripped over a stray equipment bag, and belly-flopped into the pool in front of everyone, fully clothed. I'm the coach. FML

#21225439
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40353) - you deserved it (4663)

On 07/31/2014 at 1:00am - work - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I had to sit through yet another one of my mom's, "You need to grow and gain some weight!" rants. I'm 22 and she doesn't believe me when I tell her I'm done growing. I'm pretty sure I'm not getting past 5'2". FML

#21223478
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40968) - you deserved it (3333)

On 07/29/2014 at 4:27am - misc - by Tiny (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I was doing a design sketch for work. I snapped a pic and sent it to my boss. She replied, "Impressive. Nice sketch too." I was drawing at home, naked. My dick was in the picture. FML

Today, I had to take a splinter out of my eight year old son's penis. FML

Today, I went to a bookstore to get "The Grapes of Wrath". I have a problem with controlling the volume of my voice, so once at the counter, I accidentally said quite loudly, "WHERE ARE THE ANGRY GRAPES?" FML

#21217858
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35284) - you deserved it (11541)

On 07/22/2014 at 11:36pm - misc - by Face fucking palm - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was using a public restroom. After about a minute of me being in there, a little girl came in and started pounding on the door, screaming that she had to go. My pregnancy hormones are so bad that I almost burst into tears. FML

#21213357
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35326) - you deserved it (16424)

On 07/18/2014 at 9:04pm - misc - by LissaMccracken (woman) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I ran into a good friend at work. I work at a jail. She doesn't. FML

#21211411
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51471) - you deserved it (4215)

On 07/16/2014 at 11:51pm - misc - by Is that..? - United States (Colorado)

Today, I went to a market. I saw stall which had mainly animal furs and things like that. I found a rounded, furry pen and stroked my cheek with it. Wondering what it was, being so soft and oddly shaped, I checked the tag. It was kangaroo testicles. FML

#21211381
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36312) - you deserved it (17615)

On 07/16/2014 at 11:31pm - misc - by happypineapple - Australia (Queensland)



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