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neonvortex

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neonvortex

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2404
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About neonvortex : just your average FML addict (with the exception of commenting :p)

neonvortex's page activity

Visits<b>715chiefs</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 6:32pm<b>vividpictures</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 7:43pm<b>Ichiya</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 6:36pm<b>domclark94</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 12:14pm<b>elly94</b> - the 08/09/2014 at 2:56am<b>Mons</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 4:14am<b>inner_peace</b> - the 08/01/2014 at 10:35pm<b>Bulldozer36</b> - the 07/31/2014 at 12:12pm<b>Miku01</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 5:12pm<b>decimater</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 4:44pm<b>buckdharma</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 12:45pm<b>Peck_Kcep</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 6:51pm<b>EnoshimaJunko</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 12:01am<b>Taira_Yuzuki</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 9:35pm<b>nunchux88</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 11:22am<b>AH1Zviper</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 4:58pm<b>Wolverine33</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 2:47pm<b>morondon000</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 7:10pm

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neonvortex's favorite FMLs

Today, to spice things up, my boyfriend suggested we wear disguises. Amused by the idea, I accepted. That's how I ended up having sex with Gandalf. FML

#21240323
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35289) - you deserved it (7225) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 08/18/2014 at 12:48am - intimacy - by Degueusement (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, I tried skydiving for the first time. The professional I was attached to had a boner the whole way down. FML

#21237831
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44835) - you deserved it (4380)

On 08/14/2014 at 11:36pm - intimacy - by emmamrose7 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, after months of dinners, coffees, drinks, and a few nights together, the girl of my dreams told me about this awesome guy she met yesterday. FML

#21235196
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41216) - you deserved it (3933)

On 08/11/2014 at 8:34pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, I attended a family gathering. My cousin's new baby was being passed around. By way of politely declining to hold it, I meant to say that I looked forward to getting to know it better once it could talk. What I blurted out instead was, "I can't wait until it resembles a human being." FML

Today, my psychotic step-dad asked me if I'm doing drugs. I replied with a massive amount of sarcasm: "Yeah, all of 'em. Especially meth." He flipped out, searched my room top to bottom, then grounded me "for good" until I tell him where I hid the supposed drugs. FML

#21233273
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38939) - you deserved it (11652)

On 08/09/2014 at 1:32pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I found a piece of erotic fiction on my brother's computer. It involved two lesbian teenagers, who just so happened to have the same names and physical descriptions as my sister and me. FML

#21233221
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41675) - you deserved it (3757)

On 08/09/2014 at 11:43am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - India (Maharashtra)

Today, I went to a coworker's wedding. Instead of getting to celebrate their marriage, we spent most of the service being lectured by the priest on how women are a freak by-product of "God's masterpiece design" and are the cause of all the world's problems. FML

#21233096
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35417) - you deserved it (3088)

On 08/09/2014 at 4:56am - misc - by Anonymous - Malawi

Today, I went with my girlfriend to the gym for the first time. I knew I was in bad shape, but I bet her that I could lift more than her. Not only did I get my ass handed to me by a 5', 115lbs girl in front of the entire gym, I also have to attend Zumba in bright pink spandex. FML

#21231691
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26072) - you deserved it (37450)

On 08/07/2014 at 11:36am - health - by Dancing King (man) - Norway (Rogaland)

Today, I woke up because of a weird noise. Scared, I turned on my bedside lamp. I saw my older, 17-year-old brother peeing in my bedroom doorway. He was hoping I'd step in it in the morning. FML

#21231132
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37272) - you deserved it (2578)

On 08/06/2014 at 6:18pm - kids - by whymyroomthough (woman) - United States (California)

Today, at work, an old man was having trouble using his credit card at the checkout. I told him to "just stick it in", and he replied with "I love it when you talk dirty to me." The whole line at the checkout laughed. FML

#21228111
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48196) - you deserved it (20931)

On 08/03/2014 at 1:16am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I managed to not laugh as a potential high-profile Italian client with a heavy accent repeatedly pronounced "sheet metal" as "shit metal". Unfortunately, my boss and a senior colleague couldn't contain their own laughter. We lost that deal, and our jobs are now endangered. FML

#21227795
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37181) - you deserved it (4260)

On 08/02/2014 at 6:37pm - work - by Shitmetalseller (man) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)

Today, I was watching my 3 year old brother. He asked me to get him a cookie and I said, "What's the magic word?" He looked at me angrily and said "Bitch, please." FML

#21227114
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42720) - you deserved it (6968)

On 08/01/2014 at 9:57pm - kids - by WickedRene (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my fiancé said "Rachel" instead of my name when asked to repeat, "I take thee, Emily, to be my lawfully wedded wife." I was shocked, so he explained while laughing that he doesn't even know a Rachel. He ruined our wedding for a Friends quote. FML

Today, while wandering around the big city I just relocated to, I asked a seemingly pleasant-looking lady where the nearest library was. She told me to get lost, and started laughing. Then said she was just joking and gave me directions. I'm now standing in front of a gay strip joint. FML

#21225641
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42365) - you deserved it (4352)

On 07/31/2014 at 7:38am - misc - by lostintdot (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, a new session started for my swimming squad. I walked down to the pool, tripped over a stray equipment bag, and belly-flopped into the pool in front of everyone, fully clothed. I'm the coach. FML

#21225439
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39027) - you deserved it (4342)

On 07/31/2014 at 1:00am - work - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)



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