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neonberries

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neonberries

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 1051
  • Number of comments : 103
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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neonberries's page activity

Visits<b>elbrowntown21</b> - the 03/06/2014 at 11:12pm<b>CinemaFreak</b> - the 11/22/2013 at 7:47am<b>Insanityconfined</b> - the 10/11/2013 at 4:53am<b>IHATEFMYLIFE</b> - the 07/28/2013 at 4:46am<b>chargers2588</b> - the 07/21/2013 at 1:40pm<b>jonsmith01973</b> - the 07/17/2013 at 10:36pm<b>endlessoptions78</b> - the 07/16/2013 at 11:37pm<b>ChewyODU</b> - the 07/16/2013 at 1:30pm<b>mattdwyer</b> - the 07/09/2013 at 1:15am<b>awkwardlysmiles</b> - the 07/09/2013 at 12:22am<b>dancinwookie</b> - the 07/08/2013 at 10:50pm<b>sara_rose7</b> - the 07/08/2013 at 10:40pm<b>AestheticGuy</b> - the 07/08/2013 at 10:34pm<b>sweet0cheeks</b> - the 07/08/2013 at 9:23pm<b>tacocatishere</b> - the 07/08/2013 at 8:13pm<b>Cupcake040</b> - the 07/08/2013 at 7:59pm<b>monkeycrutch</b> - the 07/08/2013 at 7:57pm<b>Nordrag</b> - the 07/08/2013 at 7:25pm

neonberries's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of neonberries's badges

neonberries's favorite FMLs

Today, my friends thought it would be fun to change my dad's name on my phone to my girlfriend's name. Guess who got an erotic text message when standing next to me while in the line to buy groceries. FML

#20826589
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47479) - you deserved it (8742)

On 08/08/2013 at 12:43am - misc - by AnnoyedByFriends -

Today, I had to put my little sister to bed. Usually my mom sings her a lullaby before she puts her to sleep, so I did too. After I finished the song, my sister looked me dead in the eyes and said, "This is why I tell people we aren't related." FML

#20826525
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45497) - you deserved it (5043)

On 08/08/2013 at 12:09am - kids - by NextAmericanIdol? - United States (Maryland)

Today, my mother yelled and yelled at me until I apologized to our cat for not petting him when he sat on my lap. FML

#20825844
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43868) - you deserved it (5093)

On 08/07/2013 at 4:55pm - misc - by wekasdjkasldasdkasdzcawqe (woman) - Sweden

Today, I dislocated my shoulder. I was screaming and writhing in pain, and my eyes were shut for most of the ride to the hospital. We stopped, and I was thrilled because I thought we were at the ER. I was wrong. My dad had stopped to order a cheeseburger. FML

#20823062
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55346) - you deserved it (4313)

On 08/06/2013 at 12:11am - health - by mcdonalds - United States

Today, I came home a little earlier than usual, only to walk in on my dad frantically trying to remove a ballgag from my mom's mouth. FML

#20822450
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50791) - you deserved it (4827)

On 08/05/2013 at 5:42pm - misc - by NO NO NO (woman) - Netherlands (Zuid-Holland)

Today, I was babysitting a kid for the first time. She asked if she could watch a movie, so I downloaded Cinderella for her. An hour later, this 10-year-old girl was lecturing me about unrealistic standards of beauty and abusive relationships, and how I suck for liking the movie. FML

#20806393
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44586) - you deserved it (7883)

On 07/27/2013 at 1:51pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Finland

Today, I went on a blind date that my friends set up. Not only did my date visibly recoil at the sight of me, she ended up trying to convince me that we're actually cousins. When I told her how absurd that was, she muttered "Fuck it" and left. FML

#20806263
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44065) - you deserved it (3574)

On 07/27/2013 at 12:30pm - love - by Anonycunt (man) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)

Today, I returned from a long business trip a day early to surprise my wife. She was sleeping, so I climbed into bed and started spooning her. Thinking I was an intruder, she simultaneously kicked me in the groin, elbowed me in the ribs, and smacked the back of her head into my jaw. FML

#20805942
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43470) - you deserved it (24571)

On 07/27/2013 at 4:03am - love - by good_aim (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was talking to my girlfriend about how I'm jealous of her best guy friend always hanging around her. She responded by saying, "Wait, I thought you knew I was dating him too?" FML

Today, my phone went off, reminding me to take my birth control. Instead of vibrating as per usual, it rang. The ringtone had been changed to my boyfriend singing "It's birth control time, birth control time, take your pill, or I'll say it ain't mine." I was sitting in a quiet waiting room. FML

#20805312
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56091) - you deserved it (9306)

On 07/26/2013 at 9:14pm - misc - by turning red - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. Instead of moaning like any normal person, he just kept saying stuff like "uh-huh," "not too bad," and "yup" in a complete monotone. It was probably the most uncomfortable experience of my life. FML

#20804720
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64785) - you deserved it (6576)

On 07/26/2013 at 2:00pm - intimacy - by awkward (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was taken to the hospital after I fell down the stairs. The physician who saw me bit his lip and said he would have to amputate my foot, and I fainted in terror. One of the nurses later told me to "learn to take a damn joke." FML

#20804580
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47687) - you deserved it (9210)

On 07/26/2013 at 12:25pm - health - by picklebug (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I attended an elderly patient's funeral. He died of a heart attack after his daughter, as his carer, stopped all of his meds in favour of a half-cup of garlic a day. Apparently she'd "read an article" about the healing power of garlic, which trumped my 6-year degree. FML

#20804217
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48105) - you deserved it (2559)

On 07/26/2013 at 3:58am - health - by Saddoc (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my mother and I were discussing how we couldn't believe it's been nearly a year since my dad died. Not paying attention, my husband absentmindedly added, "Time flies when you're having fun." FML

#20804154
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43513) - you deserved it (3179)

On 07/26/2013 at 3:06am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, my grandma walked into my house drunk. She was mumbling something about her being a badass because she beat someone with a pool stick at a bar. She's 68 years old. FML

#20804067
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38516) - you deserved it (3754)

On 07/26/2013 at 2:10am - misc - by dareyale (woman) - United States (Alabama)



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